


In Another Life

by TrinityRose



Category: The Flash
Genre: F/M, Snowells, harry the flash, speedster harry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-18
Updated: 2018-10-14
Packaged: 2019-07-14 01:46:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 60,608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16030442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TrinityRose/pseuds/TrinityRose
Summary: Alternative universe in which Harry Wells becomes the Flash





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully, I will manage to keep it completely AU, pulling from canon only a tiny bit and when necessary and not enough to make this boring LOL Also, I'm adding surprising powers and villains to the mix.
> 
> Video promo: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MxbLDXtYo8I

* * *

After months of hard work and countless hours spent in the Labs, they could finally take a break as all the preparations for the particle accelerator to go online were finished; the official launching party happening in a few days. Yet, once their boss, dr. Harrison Wells, relayed the news in the morning, they still stayed at work, by now so attached to one another that they seemed to have become an actual family. For Caitlin Snow right now there really wasn't any other place she'd like to be, working for S.T.A.R. Labs always being her dream job and dr. Wells the best boss she could've asked for. Well, if only it did end on _that_ , she thought with a sigh when cleaning up her work place, preventing the moment she would actually have to leave and figure out what she would do the next few days. Or maybe the bigger problem was actually figuring out another project she would like to work on. Harrison assured them all that after the success of launching the particle accelerator they would have the occasion to present him with their own suggestions for further research and Caitlin was very excited about that. At least until she hit a wall, not able to figure it out. And it wasn't even because she wasn't smart enough to come up with something. In fact, she was brilliant and that was the reason to why she'd been hired in the first place. No, the problem was the person of her boss, the man she'd grown so attached to those past few months that… she actually developed feelings for him. It was truly killing her, because despite him obviously being fond of her, she couldn't possibly tell if he felt the same way or not. Or maybe the lack of action from his side should give her an answer. Though she wasn't sure she liked it.

She knew she should just stop thinking about him, but every time she tried it only got worse because she couldn't help but marvel at his genius, the depths of his love for science and the way he cared for them all. Ok, well, maybe that last one wasn't entirely true. He cared, he did, but only about the people closest to him, which included her. To the rest of his employees he was actually a jerk. In fact, most of the times he acted that way even towards Barry and Cisco, but the guys were used to it by now and thought nothing of it, usually teasing their boss just because they knew they could get away with it. He had a fond spot for the two guys and for Caitlin as well, never actually being mean to her but always warm and despite some occasional gruffness she always seemed to reach him. Still, maybe not enough.

She sighed when biting on her lip and packing some stuff into her bag that she was to take with her home. She truly needed to work on her research proposition, but for now she would head to the Labs' cafeteria for lunch, sure she'd find her best friend there. Misery loved company, right?

She finally gathered everything up and left her lab, looking behind at the room with nostalgia. She was really happy that the work on the accelerator was finished, but she was also apprehensive of the future. She knew that after the launch the team they had managed to form so far wouldn't be working so closely anymore with Cisco and Barry moving on to technology and physics and herself leaning towards biochemistry. Which also meant so much less time in the company of her boss…

She sighed, telling herself she had to be strong-headed, because pining after he own boss never ended well. As she was walking down the corridor, immersed into her own thoughts, she nearly collided with someone and then realized it was Ronnie. Great, she nearly huffed. Because _that_ was just what she needed!

He didn't disappoint when immediately smiling brightly at her and asking whether she wanted to go somewhere to celebrate tonight.

"You never give up, do you?" she just sighed, so tired of saying no.

"Never," he assured her with a smile as he watched her go.

Her heart started beating faster as she spotted Harrison walking towards her from the opposite side and just as she predicted, he smiled to her – it did not miss her attention that she seemed to be the only person he smiled to around here – and came to a stop.

"Fantastic job on the accelerator, Snow. Are you heading off home or out celebrating?" he asked.

"Actually, I'm on my way to the cafeteria," she answered him with an equally broad smile. She just couldn't help it in his presence. Though she needed to be careful not to stare too much because she could easily drown in his azure eyes.

"You know," he said then after what seemed like a slight moment of actual hesitation, "maybe you should say yes for a change. Who knows, you and Ronnie would look good together."

Caitlin stilled, cursing inwardly, her good mood evaporating completely. Maybe what she really should do was quit her job and run far away from Harry – only she, Barry and Cisco could get away with calling him that – and try to salvage whatever was left of her heart and sanity.

Instead, she just pulled herself together and said, "I don't… I don't like Ronnie that way, so why force it?"

"What's not to like? He's nice and smart and your age," dr. Wells still pointed out, sticking his hands into the pockets of his ever-present black jeans.

"You do realize you've just described hundreds of men in this country, do you?" she did her best to sound normal, but inside she was screaming. She didn't mind at all that Harry was so many years her senior, in fact it was a good thing, if someone asked her. She liked his experience that could only come with age and he was actually so good-looking that she wondered whether he was even real. Because she'd actually seen once the pictures from his youth and right now he was so much more handsome than _then_.

"I wouldn't go as far as assuming all those single men are smart," he teased her just then with another smile.

"You know, I see a single and genius standing right in front of me and still can't figure out why that is."

"Why am I a genius?" he asked, a foreign note suddenly appearing in his voice.

"No, why you're single," she dared say and immediately felt flushed all over.

She did notice his pupils dilating as he heard her say that and his mouth was already opening when… her phone beeped, damn it!

"Sorry," she quickly apologized, fishing that stupid device from her bag. What a moron invented them anyway!

"Don't let me keep you occupied. Have fun at lunch!" she heard Harry say quickly and then he was just gone. In fact, as she thought of it some more, still stupefied by his sudden exit; he did that a lot. He was always in a hurry, always running towards something. All their conversations started all nice and in the end he always retreated and she could never quite figure out why that was.

Maybe she would never figure dr. Harrison Wells out. Was he a declared bachelor? Was he married to science or maybe there'd been someone in his life that successfully shattered his heart? Maybe she would never find out.

So instead of thinking about that some more, she walked into the cafeteria in an even worse mood than she'd been before she ran into him.

* * *

"Someone's in a bad mood," Barry pointed out when Caitlin put her food tray and the coffee cup on the table before falling into a free chair next to him.

"You don't look so good yourself. Is this because of that pretty barista you can't seem to ask out?" she answered him back, feeling prickly.

"Hey! That stung!" Barry bristled. "Besides, I lost my chance. She's a not a barista anymore, so not as easy to approach. She started working for the CC Picture News."

"A reporter? Nice!" Caitlin approved. "I bet she'll be at the accelerator launch."

"And I bet you'll be the one standing next to Harry on that stage," Barry told her and she shot him a look. "What?" he asked. "You're the one he trusts the most."

"Yeah…" she grumbled when reaching for her coffee.

"Who knows, maybe he'll finally ask you out," Barry suggested and she almost spat the coffee out.

"Barry, be serious! I have as much of a chance at being asked out by him than you have of approaching that girl."

"Ah, then maybe we should change that," he suddenly suggested, leaning forward in his seat. "I'll make you a deal. I will go and find Iris West in the crowd of those reporters and I _will_ ask her out. And you won't let Harry run."

"Run?"

"Oh, you know I mean! Dude's always in a hurry after you two are left alone."

"Maybe he just can't stand my company," she joked.

"Or maybe he's head over heels for you, which is not surprising by the way, and he just thinks he can't be good enough for you."

"Yeah, right," Caitlin snorted at that.

"Hey, Cait, I'm serious. Cisco and I have been making bets…"

"You've been doing _what_?!" she raised her voice slightly just then, feeling appalled.

"Can you blame us?! You two have been staring at each other for weeks!"

"Oh my God, is it that obvious when I look at him?" Caitlin seemed terrified. "You think he's figured everything out?"

"You're not listening," they suddenly heard a third party and looked up to see Cisco joining them. "I'm pretty sure Barry said that the _both_ of you are making googly eyes at each other and quite frankly, it's disturbing. Just go for it already!"

"Yeah, right and that is exactly why Harry just suggested I should go on a date with Ronnie," Caitlin informed sarcastically.

"He really did that?" Barry asked with a frown.

"Yep. Right after he told me there are plenty of nice men my age around… oh, God, he _does_ know!" Caitlin groaned, hiding her face in her hands, her meal abandoned as she suddenly lost her appetite. "This is so humiliating!"

Barry and Cisco exchanged glances.

"I think I've figured it all out," Cisco spoke and Caitlin lifted her head to look at him. "He thinks he's not good enough for you because of the age difference."

"Or he's been single for way too long," Barry threw his idea to the pile. "I heard rumors that he got rejected once by a woman he was in love with, so maybe he's also insecure."

"Yeah," Cait snorted again when finishing her coffee. "Why would a handsome, accomplished and brilliant man be insecure about anything?"

"The world is a strange place," Cisco declared when sticking fries into his mouth one by one.

* * *

It was, indeed, Caitlin Snow thought the night of the particle accelerator launch. There was huge lightning storm heading their way, but it wouldn't stop them. The weather could not intervene anyway as the accelerator was located an actual level _below_ the Labs.

What seemed truly strange, though, was that Barry's words actually came true and Harry did call Caitlin to his side the moment she arrived, telling her he needed her there during the press conference for some emotional support.

Well, she would gladly let him know she could be that kind of a support for him for the rest of his life, but she didn't, obviously; instead just walking right by his side when they were heading to the door that opened into the main atrium.

"Ready?" she asked him with a smile, not able to hide her true emotions as she took into the handsome sight of him in an actual black suit. He wasn't a typical boss when it came to his attire nor behavior. He usually just wore black jeans and black sweaters or hoodies, being mean and gruff towards his employees who usually just preferred to get out of his way, but he treated those closest to him like the family he didn't have. Caitlin knew his parents had died young, leaving him a pretty impressive inheritance with which he'd funded S.T.A.R. Labs, dedicating his life to science. The rumor Barry had mentioned a few days before seemed to be true as Caitlin found out there had been a woman in Harry's life, but she'd actually rejected him when choosing someone else. Could it be where his insecurity came from? She wondered. Or maybe he was just one of those men who preferred to stay single and enjoy life. Though he didn't seem to go out that much, if at all, just rather stay in his lab, working on another invention.

"Are you all right?" She came to a sudden stop when he asked her that, the door right in front of them.

"Yeah. Yes, I am." She managed to compose herself as she looked up into his eyes, again seeing more there. Maybe she really should follow Barry's advice and say something. The worst that could happen would be her forced to move on. Maybe that was better than daydreaming and wondering. "Harry, can I ask you something?" she suddenly said before she would change her mind.

"Anything, Snow," he assured her in a husky voice that rattled her. Because she loved the sound or it and truly, every time he said her name, he sounded so seductive that her knees went weak.

She was already opening her mouth and making a step forward and he actually smiled, his eyes lighting up when… the door opened and someone informed they were about to start.

Harry smiled to Caitlin apologetically before walking through it.

* * *

The conference was a resounding success and once they were all back in the cortex, ready to celebrate after Harrison pushed the button and initiated the launch, Caitlin caught Barry's eyes across the room. He winked at her and then smiled brightly, so she truly hoped he would seek Iris West out after this was over. For now, she looked back at Harry who just happened to be looking at her as well and in a way he hadn't seemed to before. Her heart fluttered in her chest and she felt color hitting her cheeks when…

There was a loud bang.

And everything went to hell.

People started screaming and panicking as they quickly made a dash for the exit.

Caitlin was just about to follow Cisco and Barry out the building as well when she spotted Harry walking in the opposite direction.

"What are you doing?!" she got to him before her friends managed to stop her and she grabbed his arm. He seemed surprised at the sudden touch, but still told her calmly, "I need to shut it down, Snow."

"What? No! It's too dangerous! You can't!" she protested, trying to pull him towards the exit when Ronnie suddenly got to them.

"I know how. I can help! Let's go!" he offered.

"Harry, no!" Caitlin protested and his blue eyes settled on her again, some kind of a shadow of understanding suddenly passing through his expression and for a moment everything stood still as their eyes locked together.

"Dr. Wells, there's no time! We have to go _now_!" Ronnie yelled and that seemed to wake him up.

"Caitlin, I have to," he eventually told her, briefly covering her hand on his arm with his own and she felt sparks there. Next, he removed her hand gently and gave it a little squeeze before finally letting it go and turning away from her.

"Cait! We have to go now!" Barry got to her just then and when she turned back she realized he was the only one beside her that was still left in the cortex.

"What if he gets hurt?!" She started panicking, looking at her best friend. The fact that he was risking everything by staying behind just to take her back with him meant a lot, but that was what best friends did, right? They'd known each other for a very long time, befriending in college before they even met everyone else. They always stuck together, being each other's support. Cisco didn't join them until they started working for dr. Wells.

"It's Harrison Wells. I'm sure he knows what he's doing," Barry assured her."Let's go!"

She hesitated before finally nodding and following him to the corridor and then to the fire escape. Only once she put her foot on the first stair, she heard a loud rumble again, an echo of another explosion and she looked back. Her common sense told her to get out of the building, but her heart was pulling her in the opposite direction.

With the third and loudest bang, she ran back inside, registering the sudden and terrible silence that followed and the smoke that seemed to be everywhere now. She heard Barry's voice calling her from the distance, but she ignored it. She just needed to find Harry. She needed to make sure he was all right…

* * *

She found him by sheer accident and in the worst way possible.

She was running, not seeing anything, but still moving forward. She called his name again and then started coughing violently because of all the smoke until…

She stumbled over something and lost her balance, falling down to the floor painfully, her breath knocked out.

Only then she realized that that _something_ was a body.

"Oh, no," she murmured, ignoring the pain in her body in places where it collided with the floor. "Please, God, no…"

She could barely see, so she needed to use her hands and she stilled when she touched what seemed to be an arm. She trailed it up to the person's neck, feeling a fabric of a suit underneath her fingers and then she buried her hands in soft hair.

The moment she finally managed to turn him to his back and cup his face, she immediately screamed his name, recognizing this person for her boss.

"Harry! Harrison!" she kept on calling his name, still holding his face in her hands as though it was the most precious thing. And it was, damn it! It _was_! "Harry, please, wake up!" She quickly straddled his body, not even registering the position as she leaned forward, checking his pulse and then immediately proceeding to CPR. "You are _not_ dying on me today!" she screamed when massaging his heart. She next opened his mouth and blew some air into it and went back to the heart massage. "You hear me?! Come back! Harry! HARRY!"

The smoke cleared a bit and she could see him clearer. Eyes closed. Body immobile. Hair and his suit all grey from the dust.

"Harry! Come on! Come on!" She blew the air into his lungs again. Her arms were already aching, but she would not stop. She would go on until she herself collapsed.

That was how Barry found her.

"Cait!" he screamed her name and then he was on the floor right by her side. "Oh, God. How can I help?" he offered and she truly felt like crying because the fact that he'd actually followed her into the ruble and risked his life for her was too much.

"I can't… I can't do this anymore…" she sobbed, still massaging Harry's heart.

"It's ok. I'm taking over," Barry immediately offered and pushed her out of the way.

She truly didn't have any strength left, too traumatized, too tired. Inside she was a whirlwind of emotions, her throat felt like sandpaper and she couldn't seem to catch a breath, all the crying and tears not helping at all.

And then, just when she thought she would pass out, she heard the most amazing sound in the world.

Harrison took a breath.

Barry collapsed right next to her, exhausted, still pulling his arms around her, though, to provide her comfort.

"Thank you. Thank you so much…" she whispered as she pressed her face into his neck, just now registering that she was shaking.

"He's gonna be all right," Barry assured her when stroking her back. "We're all gonna be all right."

* * *

_Two Months Later_

There was no change, Caitlin registered when performing the same routine as every other morning. She came to work. She walked straight to the lab adjacent to the cortex. She saw that Harry was still lying motionless in bed there, hooked up to a machine monitoring his heart rate. She checked the readings, releasing another breath of relief when she registered nothing bad happening during the night. Right after the particle accelerator explosion he'd been moved to a hospital and it'd been truly the worst week of her entire life as he'd kept on having heart attacks. Right after, everything always came back to normal and once Caitlin got over her initial horror at facing another loss, she figured out those couldn't be cardiac arrests since he was still alive. With the help of Cisco and Barry they transported dr. Wells back to the Labs and ever since he'd been under her care. She deduced his cells were moving so fast that it could look like a heart attack, but in fact wasn't. His heart was just beating _that_ fast, never actually ceasing to stop. Which was extraordinary and terrifying.

Still, he wasn't waking up and she began to lose her hope, slowly dying inside. She figured it was time to shave his face again, something that she enjoyed doing because it made her feel closer to him. She knew he always kept his cheeks smooth, so she did her best to maintain that. Everything so he would feel more like himself after waking up. Everything so she could maintain at least some of her sanity.

There was one line she didn't dare cross, though. She didn't give him any sponge baths nor do anything that would require seeing him naked. She would actually want to see his body, she'd had ever since she'd developed feelings for this man, but not in those circumstances. Never in those circumstances. So she left that to a qualified nurse that came and left long before she or her friends did.

Caitlin actually knew what had happened to Harrison and the worst part was that she couldn't seem to help him despite that knowledge. Ever since the particle accelerator exploded, strange beings appeared in the city, people gained powers and they quickly started to be called metahumans. In fact, everyone who'd so far worked in the Labs, left, because the person to blame was Harrison Wells. Everyone abandoned the sinking ship, but the three of them would go down with the captain because he meant too much to them to let him go.

The blood tests Caitlin regularly performed showed her the changed DNA, the indicator that Harrison, too, was a meta now. Only he wasn't responding to any stimuli, nor the medications Caitlin tried to give him in order to wake him up. It was all futile and useless and she was running out of ideas.

"Why don't you just open your eyes already, Harry?" she asked him, looking at his peaceful face. She really missed his eyes. She missed the way he looked at her. She missed _him_.

She reached to his hand and took it, running her fingers over his skin. It was a bitter irony, really, that she could finally touch him so shamelessly and he couldn't even respond.

"Please, wake up. I need you. I don't know how long I can go on like this…" She eventually sighed and left the room, entering the cortex and finding Barry sitting in front of a computer and staring at the two months old article on the CC Picture News page. _Reporter missing,_ the title said and below was a picture of a pretty Afro-American girl – Iris West.

Caitlin walked over to Barry and placed her hand on his shoulder, squeezing gently and giving him comfort this way because she'd run out of words to say a long time ago. It still meant the world to her that he'd helped her bring Harrison back, that he'd risked his own life for her and his boss. She already thanked him numerous times. There was truly nothing else to do or to say. Just wait.

She just didn't know for how long and that was the worst.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, what do you, girls, think? You did point out that I always seem to write Barry as the bad guy and the fact is that I actually love him, so I decided to go a different route in this story: )


	2. Chapter 2

Everything about his waking up was peaceful.

His cells gradually started moving so fast, his heart finally calming down as well, breathing evening out. The machine picked up the slow change in his body, but just because it was so calm and peaceful, the readings going down instead of up, the alarm didn't sound.

Caitlin was just sitting in the cortex, readying herself for another morning check up but also delaying the process as much as she could. Because the truth was that she had already lost her hope, every day the exact same replica of the one that passed. No one moved forward in the Labs anymore, everything was still, stuck in stagnation. For her, Barry and Cisco the pain started as soon as they walked onto the path leading to the building, seeing it so deserted and neglected. It'd used to be crowded with people rushing in and out of the Labs, either to work or to sightsee. Now they entered an abandoned building, still able to hear the ghosts of those who'd used to work there and who left in a hurry the moment they realized the ship was sinking, the moment they found out there was no future for them in there anymore. Mercury Labs took them all in, preying upon what happened to S.T.A.R. Labs and to its owner.

"Hey, don't do that," Caitlin suddenly heard Barry's voice and then he was right behind her, his hand landing on her shoulder. "You're falling into depression and I'm seriously worried about you."

"I just…" she sighed before hiding her face in her hands. "I don't even know what's the point anymore, Barry," she confessed, sensing him taking the chair next to her. "What's the point in going on? I have the impression that we're actually moving backwards, Barry. Where are our lives even going?" She looked at him just then.

"You know, it's ok to let go, Cait," he told her, leaning forward as he braced his arms on the desk. "No one expects you to stay here. We could always leave. We could always move Harry to some kind of a facility where he'll be comfortable."

"No," she denied fiercely when fisting her hands. "Listen, I… I know we weren't even together, but…" she bit the inside of her lips before finishing that sentence, "coma or not, I can't just leave him. He's… he's my _everything_ and he doesn't even know it, Barry." Tears welled up in her eyes just as she said that and Barry moved forward, pulling her into his arms. They'd been doing that a lot lately. She was comforting him when he was working himself up over the Iris case, actually taking upon looking for her himself and coming up with nothing. And then she was the one having the worst day ever and he was there for her for a change. "I know, it's stupid," she added when she pulled away.

"No, it's not. I wasn't the only one who saw that there was definitely something between you two. I mean, even Cisco noticed."

"Speaking of? Where is he anyways?"

"Well, I actually heard he had a date last night, so maybe…" Barry's voice trailed off significantly and Caitlin laughed through her tears.

"Good, a least someone is having a well-deserved good time." She nodded in appreciation. "Wait…" she then frowned when picking up on something Barry had said a few minutes prior. "What do you mean _we_ could always leave this place and start over?"

"Um… I thought you figured that out by now," Barry eventually decided to give her the whole truth, though he was a little sheepish about it. "I stayed here for _you_ , Cait. Not for me."

"But… but why?" She still didn't seem to understand, shocked with his revelation.

He shrugged before following with, "Because I knew you wouldn't leave Harry behind and we're a team, right?" He smiled to her and she just had to reciprocate, seriously having no idea what she'd done in her life to deserve such a best friend. "And Cisco…" Barry then added, "Cisco stayed for Harry, actually. They were always so close, having that special bond."

Caitlin slowly nodded, agreeing that. Dr. Wells and Cisco worked great when together, always bickering and teasing each other, but at the end of the day being best friends. She knew Cisco thought of Harry as somewhat of a father figure, but he never said that aloud just because of Caitlin's own feelings for the man. Cisco was actually a little younger than both Cait and Barry were, but she was still grateful he never brought those fatherly feelings up, because truly, thinking of Harry as of a father made her sick. Despite the age gap between them, they were never like that, closer to being almost lovers than anything else.

She saddened again, the word _almost_ becoming her ultimate doom. It would probably forever haunt her.

"Ok, enough of procrastinating," Caitlin eventually sighed and heaved herself out of her chair, walking into the small lab in which Harry was located. It was time for the daily check up.

* * *

Harry had been awake for a while before Caitlin actually noticed, her back turned to him as she was checking the readings of the machine with a slight frown on her face. Looking at him those days sometimes became too much, so she closed herself off more, avoiding any contact because it hurt. Right now she was studying the printed results, something bothering her, but she couldn't figure out what it was just yet because everything seemed normal.

First, he moved his fingers, feeling the soft fabric of the sheet on the bed in which he was lying. Next, he realized he was actually down on his back, a slow and steady beeping reaching his ears, telling him there was a heart rate monitoring machine close by. Yet, his pulse didn't seem to elevate just yet as he opened his eyes, taking in the view of the ceiling above him. Somehow he was perfectly calm, feeling as though he'd just woken up from a very long and very relaxing dream. He felt stronger. In fact, he seemed stronger than he'd been for years and that was kind of confusing, his pulse finally jumping a notch.

He heard some papers being ruffled and that was when he finally turned his head, seeing Snow standing there, her white lab coat on, her back turned to him.

It was also the moment he realized _he_ was the patient.

And it all came rushing back to him.

Not that he actually recalled anything after telling her to go and following Ronnie to the particle accelerator. He just had a vague memory of something going very, very wrong and himself feeling incredibly guilty about it just because he could actually stop it, seeing the danger long before and ignoring it, sure that nothing would happen in the end. Yet, it had. Next thing he remembered was some explosion and a cloud of smoke and… _nothing_.

Caitlin frowned even harder when she raised her eyes from the paper to the machine that suddenly came to life, indicating a strange reading and then she froze, not able to move at all even though it was truly all she wanted to do.

Because she heard him. And it wasn't her imagination.

" _Snow_ …" the voice low and raspy, the throat dry.

She had no idea how she managed to compose herself, but somehow before she even moved to look at him, she reached her hand to the machine and turned it off, its sounds dying out, leaving nothing but the two breathing people in the room.

She could hear footsteps in the cortex outside as Barry must've already noticed something and that was when she finally turned around slowly, her eyes opening widely and immediately filling with tears.

Because she didn't meet with Harrison still in a coma. She actually met with his own eyes. Radiant blues. Like the sky in the most beautiful shiny day. Like the cleanest of streams. Her favorite shade of also favorite color.

He was back.

She smiled, not able to stop now that she did so, a stray tear flowing down her cheek. She spotted his eyes actually following the drop, so she brought her hand to her face to wipe it off.

"Dr. Wells!" Barry stopped in the door, his voice excited, alive, _hopeful._

Only Harrison didn't even look at the younger man, his entire attention now focused on Caitlin. She was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen when she was just standing there with that awe and happiness painted all over her face.

"Harry," she finally said his name and he smiled to her before wincing slightly when his hand traveled to his throat. "You want some water? Sure you do! You haven't had anything in your mouth for months!" she said just then and reached to the bedside table where she kept the pitcher and a glass. It had no sense being there until _now_.

Harrison braced himself on his elbows and slowly sat up, accepting the glass from her. Their fingers brushed when she handed it to him and she felt a jolt of electricity. _Sparks._ She didn't think much of it, though. It was enough for now that he was _awake_.

"Wait…" A deep frown appeared between his eyebrows, pursing the lines on his face that came with age. He put the empty glass down and looked back at Caitlin. "What did you mean _months_?" There it was. Nothing about his waking up was peaceful anymore as he suddenly felt panic welling up inside of him, just now registering how weird it was to wake up in the lab adjacent to the cortex. And an empty one to that when not counting Snow or Allen.

"Um…" Caitlin started, but somehow she couldn't finish, desperately wanting to spare him the pain that would surely follow once he found out that his lifelong dream, all that he'd worked so far to achieve, all of that was just _gone_.

" _How long_?" he asked in a changed voice, his hands tightening on the edges of the bed on which he was sitting.

"Three," it was Barry who answered, walking inside the room and standing next to Cait. "I'm sorry, dr. Wells, but you've been in a coma for three months."

Harrison's lips parted in shock as he stared off into the distance, not seeing anything or anyone, just trying to _remember_ , but coming up with _nothing_. Everything about the explosion he heard was just blank.

"What happened?" he eventually asked as he digested that information, readying himself for more.

"The particle accelerator… it… exploded," Snow answered him this time and their eyes met again, a concerned and pained look on her face. "I'm sorry."

"For what? It wasn't your fault," he told her brusquely and she winced at the tone. Well, it wasn't her fault because it was _his_. From the very beginning it was _his own damn fault_. And now he was the one who was going to have to live with that.

"What happened to me?" he followed with another question.

"I… I found you unconscious in one of the corridors near the accelerator," Caitlin started explaining. "With Barry's help, we brought you back, but you've been in a coma until today."

Something passed through his expression as he heard that and he looked her in the eye again. If only did he know how difficult it was for her to act all normal when he was doing so. The past three months all she'd been dreaming about was looking into those blues again and now she couldn't seem to escape its radiancy.

" _You found me_?" he made sure there, his pupils enlarging as he took it all in. "Snow, that is…" he started right then, feeling so terribly guilty. And to know that she'd come back for him and saved his life… to know that she could've actually _died_ in the process… It was too much.

"If I didn't, you wouldn't be here today," she told him with a shrug, yet, he could see the coiled energy in her just now. He could also sense it. There was something nameless between them, something unspoken and it was nearly as palpable as any physical object could be. It had always been there, but none of them acted on it so far. Now that he was awake, he didn't think he finally could just because of what lay so heavily on his conscience.

He really had screwed everything up.

"Oh, my God!" they suddenly heard Cisco's voice coming from the cortex and then he was right there, throwing himself at Harrison and hugging the man. It was the first hug the doctor received and Caitlin felt strangely jealous that she didn't seem to have enough courage to do that herself. Then again, despite their constant eye contacts and exchanged looks, they never seemed to be touching all that often. She desperately wanted it to change, but she knew she couldn't simply lean forward and put her arms around him without giving too much away. Because once she felt him close, once she was actually able to sense the smell of his skin, that chest raising and falling with every breath he took and the warmth coming from his body… she wouldn't be able to handle herself. She always seemed to be at awe when she realized how much this man seemed to be affecting her without even getting close physically. Then she thought what it would be like if they finally did cross that line and she truly couldn't imagine the fireworks erupting then.

"It's good to see you, too, Cisco." Harry smiled to his younger friend when he was finally released from his arms.

"So why didn't you, guys, call me, hah?!" Cisco then turned to Caitlin and Barry.

"He literally _just_ woke up, man," Barry tried defending himself. "Besides, you were out with a girl, so…"

"So nothing! You call me! Nothing's more important than you, guys! So, what happened?" he then asked Caitlin and suddenly they were all looking at her and she truly didn't know how to escape the ever-present light of certain blue eyes…

"I have no idea. I haven't run any tests just yet… I… I will have to get down to it. But first, maybe you would like something to eat, Harry?" She turned to the man with concern on her face. "Your metabolism works really fast now and I'm sure you'll soon get dizzy. After all, you were being fed through IV the past few weeks."

Harry's hands pressed against his belly and a strange expression appeared on his face.

"If that's true, then why... why my stomach muscles are still so hard?" he gasped, finally getting out of bed and towering over them all. Caitlin nearly forgot how tall he was. And so handsome. Oh, God, she had it bad… she saddened and then her eyes enlarged, resembling two big plates as she watched the man walk over to a mirror and pulling up his shirt with S.T.A.R. Labs logo on it, examining the muscles on his flat and taut stomach with scientific curiosity.

"How is this possible?" He then turned to his remaining team, his shirt still lifted and Caitlin's mouth went dry as she traced down his stomach to the tantalizing v line disappearing under the grey sweat pants that hung way too loosely on his hips.

She couldn't compose herself in time and Cisco actually chuckled when he spotted her expression. Barry, on the other hand, chose helping her instead and he said, "Well, there's something we haven't told you, yet, dr. Wells… you're a… um…" Yet, somehow, those words couldn't seem to leave his mouth.

"A what?" Harry asked with a frown, finally dropping the shirt and placing his hands on his hips, looking at them expectantly.

"A metahuman, apparently," Caitlin finished and he just had to stare at her with those eyes again.

* * *

"So, am I gonna have powers now?" Harry asked during Caitlin's examination of him. "Or do I have them already? How does this even work?" He wanted to know.

She looked up at his face as she was just measuring his pressure. She knew there was more to those questions. In fact, she knew _him_ all too well as not to see it. Whereas she'd disappeared to her private lab in order to prepare all the tests she was going to have to run on him, Cisco and Barry filled him in on what happened to the Labs. And quite frankly, she was glad she wasn't there for that because to see the devastated look on his face… it would be too much. She wouldn't be able to stop herself then from reaching out to him.

And now he seemed to be doing anything and everything so he wouldn't have to deal with losing everything just yet.

"Honestly, Harry," she said when meeting his eyes and taking a deep, ragged breath, "I don't know. This is still a new area of study to me. We're grasping in the dark."

"So now I'm your study subject?" he teased her just then and she froze, not knowing how to answer that. "Relax, Snow, I'm kidding."

When did he exactly develop such a sense of humor? She wondered, figuring it must've been the denial and defense mechanism working its magic so far.

The truth was that she couldn't stand this anymore. Her face had been burning red for quite some time now. In fact, it'd started when they found themselves in her lab alone and he had to remove his shirt so she could stick electrodes to his chest. And damn, he was perfect. She had no other word to describe his physique but by _perfect_. He never was a bulky man with muscles too large to ever be natural and that was still the case. Thankfully, she thought, never liking that about men. His muscles were beautiful, natural, pleasing to the eye. At least to her eyes. So yes, he was perfect _._

Unfortunately, the whole process of testing him didn't end just with the electrodes. She had to stay close to him to perform all the examinations she could think of and she was barely holding on to her control. Because the smell of his skin, the close proximity to him and those muscles and all that nakedness… She couldn't take this anymore, feeling so hot she actually started to sweat.

She breathed out in relief when all was done and she could move away from him, walking to her desk where she left all the thingies she just took off of him. Next, she turned back to face him, remaining her distance, though.

"I'm all done. You can put your shirt back on," she informed. _Or else I'm either gonna jump you or have a heart attack_ , she added in her thoughts, desperately needing some air.

He did grab the piece of clothing, though with a frown. She knew that it had nothing to do with any unwillingness to get dressed. He simply hated the grey sweatshirts and pants of S.T.A.R. Labs, feeling most comfortable in his usual black clothes.

He was free to go, yet, when he got up from the gurney, he did linger around, apparently not so eager to leave her company. Truth be told, she'd rather he stayed as long as possible as well.

"I should thank you, Snow," he said in a hoarse voice and truly, she didn't think she could feel hotter, "for saving my life," he then added awkwardly. She knew him well, so she realized how hard it was for him to say that aloud. She appreciated it that much more.

"You'd do the same for me, I'm sure of it," she responded with and she immediately regretted it. Because his pupils dilated as he heard that, the blue of his irises scorching her. She really meant it as casual 'you're welcome', but once those words left her mouth, they seemed to convey a much deeper meaning and one that they were both painfully aware of.

"Yes," he agreed with her to her astonishment, his eyes still boring into hers. She desperately wanted to look away, knowing she was holding his gaze for way too long to be considered polite or normal. It could only mean one thing and that was something they never felt like ready for. "Yes, I would," he confirmed.

The sound of his voice, the texture and the tone of it and the way he said it… oh, God, Caitlin was so far gone she didn't even know what to do or how to act anymore or whether she should respond somehow. She just couldn't seem to find herself in this suddenly discovered new world of possibilities. She wasn't in stagnation anymore. In fact, she was now moving with the speed of light and she desperately wanted to hit pause so she could come to terms with everything that happened. It was just too overwhelming.

"So, I heard from Cisco that Ronnie and Iris among some employees of mine are still missing and so much more got hurt," he eventually started on the elephant in the room.

Caitlin nodded. "Few more weeks and they'll be considered dead. You don't remember what happened when you followed Ronnie, do you?" she then asked in plain curiosity. "I mean, I know he must've been the one to shut the particle accelerator down since I found you unconscious, but…"

"No. I don't," Harry admitted, sticking his hands into the pockets of the grey sweatpants, causing them to ride a little lower on his hips and she truly had to struggle not to look _there_. "My guess is that he was obliterated, though. Sorry."

"For what?" She frowned. "I am sorry that he is dead, obviously, because he was the hero who turned it off on time, but… I never cared about him and you are well aware of that."

Harrison nodded, looking at the floor. "Yeah. Yes, I am."

There was pregnant silence for a moment and Caitlin didn't even realize that she chewing on her lip, trying to come up with something more to say when his eyes settled on her mouth, igniting a fire inside of her again, but then he only sighed, closing them and rubbing with his hands.

"Snow," he finally spoke again, this time in a changed voice. It took her a while to realize it was _pain_ that she heard there. "I don't…" he came to a stop, shook his head and then finally continued, "I don't know what to do now. I'm ruined, aren't I? I still..." He shook his head again, clearly feeling uncomfortable admitting that to her. "I still can't believe the Labs are just gone. That all my employees…"

"Harry," she said his name just then, making a few steps closer to him. "We will figure it out together. Barry, Cisco… me… we all stayed for you. Because we care. Because we're a team, right?"

He met her eyes and eventually followed with, "No. No, this goes _beyond_ that, Snow and we both know it. What you did… it wasn't just blind loyalty. It was… it's what family does and I don't deserve it," he confessed to her surprise. What was he even talking about?

"Of course you do," she argued when making another step. This was already too close, but she couldn't help it. He was hurting. "I know how hard this must be for you, Harry," she then started again when he remained silent, looking away. "All you've worked so hard for, for the most part of your life is… is…" now she had trouble speaking as she just couldn't seem to say it. She didn't want to cause him even more pain. "We will get through this," she eventually settled for. "We are not going anywhere. We are staying and if you want, we will help you bring S.T.A.R. Labs to its former glory. There is no such thing as a lost cause, Harrison."

He looked at her just then. "Yes, it is," he still argued and she couldn't be sure what exactly he meant by that, a unpleasant weight settling in her stomach.

"I don't understand," she admitted, making that one final step and arriving right in front of him. They were face to face now, so close yet still so far away and everything she could ever want was for him to just reach out and pull her in, to kiss her or at least embrace her. God, how much she craved to just lose herself in this man. Besides him there was truly nothing she had left, even her career going up in flames. And it wasn't his fault. She had done that to herself because she couldn't leave his side. What more did he need? She thought, bravely meeting his eyes and seeing him looking back with everything that was still unspoken between them. She just wanted to tell him without having to use actual words that she was there, that she would _always_ be thereand that he was truly all she needed.

She saw his lips part, a slight hesitation on his face when he suddenly raised his hand. She didn't know what he was going to do with it. She didn't know whether he was going to touch her face or brush her hair. She didn't because one moment he was standing there and the next he was just gone. The door opening so fast that it hit the wall as he sped away.

Caitlin just stood there, her mouth hanging open, pretty sure now about what his powers actually were.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Are you still alive? Because I'm quite sure I died a few times when writing this LOL Also, sorry in advance if I didn't get all the mistakes. I can't even see anymore. Though, if there are some left, I will get them once I spell check this story again when it's finished.
> 
> I decided to go with 3 months instead of 9, because… Caitlin wouldn't survive that long.
> 
> And damn it, once those two finally start, a bomb would surely go off…


	3. Chapter 3

It actually took them a while to locate to where Harry had disappeared to, obviously having no control over his suddenly developed powers. In fact, once the trio came up with a solution of how to find him when tinkering with the S.T.A.R. Labs' satellite the same way they had done before to track down some other metas and Cisco actually ran to the garage to grab a company van in order to get to Wells and drive him back, the man in question himself managed to return, rendering Ramon's trip useless.

The younger man was still a little offended that he had to drive there and back whereas Harry just popped out and in as he pleased. Yet, in the end, they were all just relieved he was ok, even if a little banged up since he couldn't slow down in time and crashed with one of the Labs' walls.

"This is truly remarkable," Caitlin was just saying when checking up the arm he pretty much broke as he collided with the hard surface. "There is no trace of the fracture anymore… and the bruises are already gone as well," she informed when putting her hands on said arm and gently bending it and then straightening to make sure everything was working all right. It did not miss her attention that they were again so damn close and that his eyes avoided hers for all cost. Luckily, at least this proximity didn't affect her as much as she was more concerned about his health at the moment, his bones and a possible concussion rather than daydreaming about his body, so that was a plus. Yet, once she finally let go, already missing the feel of his muscles underneath her fingers as they flexed and unflexed, she did swallow, feeling color hitting her face. "You're completely healed," she then informed when looking at him and she knew immediately that this was a mistake, because she finally got to meet those blue eyes and then she noticed the sheen of sweat covering his forehead. Did she have this effect on him while she was working on his arm? She wondered. In the end, she dismissed that, burying all the feelings that threatened to come up to the surface inside of her and moving away, clearing her throat and looking up at both Cisco and Barry who were standing in the door now, their arms folded over his chests as they were waiting for the diagnosis. Cisco was still grumpy and at least this sight amused Caitlin a little, so she was able to let go of some of the tension. She did notice Barry's eyes following her, though, and she could swear he wanted to tell her that he wasn't sure how much of this both he and Cisco would be able to handle before they went crazy.

"So, I guess you can safely hit the treadmill now," Caitlin said to no one in particular, but they all knew it was meant for Harry.

"So I could obliterate it?" Wells asked in response, his voice gruff and unpleasant. She wondered what his deal was, but then she remembered that he not only got powers he'd never even dreamt of having, but also lost everything that he _had,_ actually, so she would let it slide. For now. Because sooner or later they would most definitely have to talk about his behavior towards her. It was truly getting ridiculous.

"Have a little faith, man! Just a second ago I was out in the speed lab…" Cisco immediately followed with.

"Speed lab?" both Barry and Caitlin asked in the same time whereas Harrison just raised his eyebrows and then frowned.

"Yeah, speed lab! What a cool name, hah? Anyway… I _Ciscoed_ the treadmill! It will be completely safe for you to run on it so we could check how fast you can actually go!" he finished, clearly very proud of himself, but then his smile faded away when he realized that no one else shared his enthusiasm. "What is so wrong of me to choose to look at the bright side here? I just don't get you, people."

For the first time since Harry had woken up, he and Caitlin exchanged knowing looks that had nothing to do with any kind of desire or yearning between them. In fact, it suddenly made her feel happy and relieved, seeing that what had been there between them before, this amazing friendship, this special bond, was still there. They had to just try and find their way back to it and then sort of all their issues. Or she hoped so.

Or maybe once of those days she would get a heart attack. Or would end up brokenhearted and truly, despite her always priding herself on being a strong, independent and happy single who didn't need just any man, but the right one who would not be her half but a welcomed addition; she could tell that Harrison had undone her in a way she'd never anticipated. She wasn't sure she could ever go on with her life without him and that thought was downright depressing.

"Snow?" she heard his hoarse voice calling her name and she stilled, then finally turned to look at him and discovered that they were alone in the room, Barry and Cisco already gone to the _speed lab_. Again, the way Harry was looking at her just now was only conveying concern. "Are you all right?" he asked and she had to blink a few times before she realized she was still trying to tidy up her already cleaned desk.

"Yeah…" she finally answered, her voice hoarse. "Yes, sure. Let's go," she just said, walking over to him as he let her through the door first. She sent him a small smile then when passing him by, suddenly remembering the last walk they'd had together to the press conference before everything went to hell.

"I never asked how you were doing," he was clearly in the mood for continuing this conversation and it came as a surprise to her again.

"What do you mean?" she followed with, not able to look at him just yet as her heart seemed to speed up.

"I wasn't the only one who lost everything," he hinted. "I still don't understand why the three of you stayed, but… well," he hesitated and she sensed a foreign note in the tone of his voice. "I guess I should be thanking you instead of being so pissed about everything." In the end, he chuckled and it was both a welcomed sound and sight to Snow as she couldn't help it but look at him eventually.

"We wanted to," she simply said, "so it was no problem."

"But you couldn't have known for how long I'd be in that coma or whether I'd even wake up."

Their eyes met again and she let go, feeling herself falling forward and down, down, down into the wells of his eyes… which was funny, she then thought, almost laughing when comparing his eyes to a wells. Cisco would love that. Or maybe he would simply roll his eyes at her for getting all mushy and romantic.

Harry was looking at her in that special, meaningful way again and she forced herself to take her eyes off of his face, welcoming their arrival at the speed lab with relief.

"We're here," she said, "so show us what you got, dr. Wells," she then encouraged him with a smile.

She crossed over to the small platform on which Cisco and Barry were already standing, ready to start whereas Harry headed to the treadmill with a heavy sigh.

Barry did send her another knowing and exasperated look when she approached him, so she frowned at him, letting him know what she thought of this.

"How long…?" he still started when suddenly, a binder that held the thread mill instruction landed on the floor. All three of them just started at it, not able to comprehend how it even got there since it was placed right in the middle of the table and Harry didn't even start to run yet, so there was no way there was any heavy wind around. Then again, the binder was pretty thick and heavy, so how on earth…

"That was weird," Barry frowned.

"And creepy," Cisco added.

"Guys! Can we just start already, damn it?!" they heard Harry complaining from the treadmill, so Cisco raised his thumbs up at him, smiled broadly and nodded.

"Oh, boy!" Barry exclaimed the moment dr. Wells started running. "He's going realllly fast!"

"Yes, that he is," Caitlin agreed with a nod, her eyes opened widely as she took in all that Harry could do now. "Even too… uh oh," she then frowned. "Harry! Harrison, stop!" she screamed to him, but he didn't seem to hear her. "Harry! Your glucose level… you're gonna… pass out," she added in a much quieter voice as he suddenly lost his balance and… fell out of the treadmill, crashing against another wall and probably breaking something _again_.

* * *

This time it was his wrist that Caitlin was gently holding in her hand. Just a few minutes before it had been in a terrible condition and she actually had to set it to which he almost groaned in pain, but held on bravely. She nearly sighed just then, still holding his hand, her fingers absentmindedly brushing over his skin to soothe the pain, even though she knew it was ridiculous. Whatever pain killers she could give him, it would have to be a huge dose, because she was sure his system would immediately handle it and there would be no trace of it. Not to mention that she needed to act fast because of his speed healing and so did not want those bones to set badly so she would have to break them again…

So now Caitlin Snow was basically stroking the place where his wrist had been broken as she held it, waiting for it all to set properly. None of them said anything, none of them even commented on what she was doing. And who knew, maybe she helped him somehow anyways. There were various medical and psychological studies indicating that a person might indeed feel less pain when touched or hugged by someone they cared about. The question remained, though – did Harrison truly cared about her?

She couldn't think of it much, staring at the wall ahead of herself instead of at him. The problem was that she kept on finding him hotter and hotter every single day and that process had started a long time ago. She was also constantly in awe with his genius, with the person he was, even if sometimes mean or rough on the edges, she knew his heart was in the right place.

Oh, yes, he was most definitely hot, she decided, a faint scent of his sweat reaching her nostrils; probably because of everything he'd done that day. And it wasn't unpleasant at all, she discovered. In fact, it turned her on and she wouldn't mind if he just pushed her against…

"Snow?" his voice sounded annoyed and impatient when he finally spoke, shattering her sexual illusions to pieces.

She snapped herself out of it and finally looked him in the eye. And he didn't look pissed at all. If so, she knew he tried to cover his own anguish by acting all hostile. He must've been suffering from something that reached beyond physical wounds which were already inexistent anyway. "Is it healed yet?" he asked her then and she shifted her eyes to his wrist, touching it gently, feeling the bones there. She could swear he inhaled sharply to which she winced.

"Does it hurt?"

"No. So, can I go now?" Without waiting for her answer, he got up, almost bumping into her and she needed to jump away from him, the close proximity suddenly becoming way too much.

In fact, it'd been too much ever since… she couldn't even tell… _met him_?

She was already missing the touch of his skin when he moved to the door in which Barry and Cisco suddenly appeared.

"Um…I was just leaving?" Harry told them sarcastically, folding his arms over his chest as they were standing there, not letting him pass.

"But aren't you a little bit excited?!" Barry chirped and it was the first time Caitlin had seen him truly hyped about something for months.

"Dude!" Cisco called out in shock. "You can totally be the hero the Central City needs right now!"

"Um… how about… not?" Harry just said, shifting from one foot to another.

"Wait… what?" Cisco seemed to be surprised with that answer, both his and Barry's smiles fading. "But… but now you have so much potential! You can be a superhero! I can totally make you a supersuit and…"

" _Ramon,_ " Harry said in one of his most menacing voices, " _let me through_."

"So you don't even care that you can help so ma…?" Barry just needed to ask, but he then came to a sudden stop as she noticed Caitlin behind Harry, shaking her head at him. "Um… never mind…" He listened to her just because his friend knew their boss best. He had to trust her on this, so he eventually moved away from the door.

"Thank you!" Harry growled.

"But, dude!" Cisco still refused to give up. "You need…"

"What I need is a shower and a good night sleep!" They all felt the sudden whoosh of air when pissed off Wells used his powers to get away, yet, once again.

"But… but…" Cisco stammered, turning back to Cait and Barry who just walked over to her.

"He needs time, Cisco," Caitlin told him, a concerned look on her face. "After all, he did just lose everything."

"But he gained so much more!"

"Yes, but S.T.A.R. Labs was really what he wanted to do. He dedicated his life to science and making new discoveries, finding fantastic scientists… and now it's all gone. Just like that. Gone overnight because of one failure."

There was sudden silence, morose expressions appearing on the boys' faces as they took it all in.

"He did wake up and find himself having powers, but…" Caitlin only sighed when bringing her hand to her forehead and rubbing it, "he's so confused. He doesn't want _this_. He wants what was _before_. He just wants to come back to that."

"The thing is that we can't," Barry said in a defeated voice, "we can only move forward."

Caitlin nodded. "That's gonna be the hard part."

"Hey, don't worry. It's gonna be all right," her friend then comforted her when putting one of his arms around her and pressing her briefly to his side. "He'll come around and then maybe you two…"

"Honestly, Barry, right now I think Harry's well-being is what's most important."

"So, maybe you could go over to his place and talk to him? Since you're obviously the one who understands him best," Cisco suddenly suggested.

"To his actual _home_? Are you kidding me?" Caitlin seemed horrified. "No, I can't do that!"

"Why not? Maybe after a little heart to heart, you two will finally hit it off" Cisco pushed, suddenly feeling very proud of his advice. "I mean, dude needs some comfort and who's gonna be better than…"

"Cisco, the man doesn't have a full control of his powers just yet," Barry reminded him, "he might not even be up to the task! I mean… talking physics… what if he finishes before she even feels anything and…"

"Oh, my God!" Caitlin suddenly exclaimed, clamping her hands over her ears, but it was too late, obviously. " _Seriously,_ Barry?!"

At least he had the decency to look ashamed.

"I'm sorry… physics… I just got carried away."

"Um… yeah, I was wondering where you were going with that…" Cisco nodded and then he couldn't help it anymore, he burst out laughing. "Can you even imagine?! All that sexual build-up… and then just sorry, major disappointment."

"Dude," Barry said in a warning tone just then, seeing that Caitlin looked like she was going to cry. "That's so not cool."

"You're the one who said it first!"

"And I am sorry! I have a fat mouth! But stop already! Let's give Harry some time. I'm sure he'll come around."

"I'm just… I'm gonna head home," Caitlin said in a quiet voice and gathered up her stuff.

"Cait… wait…" Barry caught up with he by the door.

"I really need to be alone right now, ok? Don't try to follow me, Barry. I appreciate your concern, I really do, but I need some me time to breathe, ok?"

Eventually, he nodded and just watched her leave with a sad expression on his face.

* * *

Caitlin didn't really show up at work early, which seemed off to her as those past three months she'd wanted both to get to the Labs as fast as could to check up on Harry and prolong her walking there so she wouldn't have to face, yet, another disappointment. Now she barely got up from bed, so tired she was, the emotional strain from the day before still keeping her in its vise. In fact, she'd been sure she wouldn't sleep at all once she'd gotten home the night before, but surprisingly, the moment her face touched the pillow, she was gone, buried in her land of dreams. Which she never seemed to remember the next morning, that was. Still, as a medic she knew that every person dreamed every single night despite their ability to recall said dreams.

When she got to the cortex, already nursing a tall cup of coffee she'd gotten on her way there, bracing herself for seeing Harrison, she was met with disappointment because he just wasn't there.

She started wondering how long she should wait before actually having to go over to his house so they could talk when Cisco and Barry showed up, both excited.

"I've been up all night!" Cisco informed. "Look!" He then ran over to the dummy that Caitlin had actually missed standing in the far corner of the cortex and ripped the blanket from it, showing… a yellow supersuit.

"Um… I recall Harry telling you he didn't want a suit," Caitlin reminded, slowly sipping from her cup when settling herself in her chair.

"Correct," they suddenly heard Wells's voice coming from the door.

They all turned in that direction, pleasantly surprised to see him there. In fact, he'd always been the one showing up first at work and one day Snow deduced he sometimes didn't even bother coming back home, which was quite a sad discovery if someone asked her.

"I'm glad you're back," she told him now, sending his way a warm smile.

"I didn't want to show up," he said to her astonishment, "but then I realized I had nowhere else to be."

His answer alone caused her heart to ache because she felt so sorry for him and she wished she could've just gone over to him and put her arms around him, embracing him tightly. She wished she could've been there for him the previous night and there was nothing naughty about it in her thoughts now as she just wanted to be able to be there for him, to talk and to hold him. Maybe she should have listened to Cisco, after all. Still, it was too late now.

"Can you just listen to me for a moment?" Cisco asked, waving at them all to attract their attention back to the suit. "Isn't this cool?"

"No," Harry quickly voiced his opinion when grabbing Snow's coffee cup from the desk. "Do you mind? I'm exhausted," he asked for her permission, but before she even managed to answer, he brought the cup to his lips and drunk the rest of the liquid. "Thanks… Next one is on me," he added after a moment of hesitation and Caitlin bit on her lower lip, suddenly wondering whether there was some hidden meaning behind this.

"Ok, Ramon," Harry then said to his friend, sighing when taking a chair next to Cait and putting his arms behind his head as he settled himself in. "Amuse us." There was no excitement in his voice whatsoever and he clearly didn't care about the suit, but Snow could tell he missed their company. Without them he was all alone and it was the most heartbreaking thing in the world. Because he had nothing and no one else left.

"So, the cool thing is… that it's fireproof… you know, I already had this prototype of a comfy firefighter's suit that I've been working on for the last three months just to occupy myself with something… and I spent the whole night adjusting it to you, dr. Wells… I checked all your test results and readings and this… this has inbuilt comms… to, ya know, have communication when you're out in the field…"

Instead of watching Cisco's presentation of the suit, Caitlin actually found herself studying Harrison's face and it didn't take a genius to see that he did not like this idea at all. If someone asked her, she would say it was too soon, that he needed to get back on his feet first, to adjust himself to this new and scary reality. He had to lean on his friends, the only people he had left and _then_ , when was ready, he could finally put on a suit. He had to accept this possibility, this new calling. It couldn't just be thrown upon him. Career changes didn't happen overnight and even if it'd been three months, to him the particle accelerator launch felt like yesterday because he wasn't aware of the time passing.

"So, will you take it for a spin?" Cisco eventually asked, done with the presentation.

"No," Harry simply answered, getting up from his chair and disappearing in the hallway.

"Um… wait… what do you…? Dr. Wells!" Cisco took upon running after him, but Caitlin immediately shook her head, a sad expressions ever-present on her face.

"I'm going to my office! Try and follow!" Harry still called out to his younger friend and eventually, Cisco did stop, letting him go.

"You can't push him," Caitlin advised. "He's not ready. You cannot just push someone into the field when he's not ready."

"But he has powers now! It's so exciting!"

"Yeah, not to him," Barry backed Caitlin up. "He feels like his life just ended. He's ruined and he lost everything. He doesn't care. Maybe he never will," he finished with a sigh.

"So, we're all just gonna let this dude give up?" Cisco asked then, the smile finally disappearing from his face. Now he was wearing a troubled expression.

Caitlin briefly placed her hand on his shoulder and gave it a little squeeze as she walked over to him. "No, we will never let him go, but we have to be supportive, not pushy." Then she made her way to the door.

"Are you going to talk to him?" Barry wanted to know.

"Actually, no, I think he needs some alone time now to deal with it all," she answered with a sigh. "I need to make another coffee run."

"Bring more, will ya?!" Cisco still called after her.

* * *

Caitlin didn't know where they even came from, but as she made her way to the S.T.A.R. Labs parking garage, there were tears in her eyes. She just felt so horribly helpless, her heart heavy and aching. She wanted nothing more than to help Harry, to be the support he needed, but she didn't seem to know how to approach him anymore. Things seemed to have complicated between them even more if that was possible and despite some moments when she could clearly feel her being on the right track as they talked and smiled to each other the way they'd used to, there was so much more of unspoken between them as well, of glances and things that should mean _something_ , but none of them dared say or do anything. She just couldn't understand why. Could she be so mistaken that he didn't really have feelings for her? But even Cisco, who was usually dumb about stuff like that, could tell he did.

Caitlin sighed when finally reaching her car, bringing her hand to her eyes and wiping the tears away when sniffling. She needed to find some tissue in that bag of hers…

She started rummaging through it, finding her car keys right away, but of course, no tissues…

She just didn't know what to do anymore. She figured she would have to seek Harry out and talk to him, because if they didn't resolve all their issues, there was no way they could ever move forward or even deal with his powers without any emotional baggage.

Yes, that was exactly what she would do, she thought, changing her mind about the coffee.

She turned around and… came to a sudden stop, a scream escaping her lips.

Because she just saw Ronnie.

Ronnie Raymond standing right in front of her, though she barely recognized him because of his eyes. Which were red. And the smile. Which seemed evil.

She was just about to run, but she felt herself being snatched away with such a speed that she felt dizzy.


	4. Chapter 4

"Wasn't Cait supposed to bring us coffee?" Barry asked Cisco with a frown when he came back to the cortex about an hour later. "She never came to find me."

"Well, yeah, because she obviously didn't get any for us," Cisco informed his friend without even turning to look at him as he was still tinkering with the suit.

"Let it go," Barry advised, finally making his way to his friend and placing his hand on the guy's arm. "He's not gonna wear this anytime soon. You know how dr. Wells is… there is no such thing as forcing him to do anything. If you try even harder, you may wait for him to be the speedster you dream of forever… Now, seriously, where is Caitlin?"

"Dude, just relax, ok? Poor girl has been through enough those last few months and now we seem to be in an even bigger mess. Give her some time. She's probably sitting at Jitters, brooding over her coffee."

"Which she would totally get for _me_ ," Barry emphasized when scratching his head.

"That is offensive, you know?" Cisco folded his arms over his chest as he turned to him. "I'm your friend, too! You can't just be this little clique…"

"I think that two people is actually not enough to call it…"

"Then ok! Best friends! And maybe I'm jealous!"

"Dude… I…"

They would probably argue some more if they weren't interrupted by a thud, a noise Barry's phone made when colliding with the floor.

The man in question came to a stop, touching the pocket of his jeans and then looking at the phone with a weird expression on his face before eventually reaching for it and picking it up.

"That's weird…" he said, still staring at the screen which gladly hadn't shattered. "How could it just fall out of my pocket?"

"I don't know! You probably haven't stuck it there deep enough…" once having said that, Cisco actually burst out laughing, but Barry didn't even seem to hear him as he unlocked the screen and chose a number.

"She's not picking up," he said with a frown.

"Maybe she just needs some time."

"No, Cisco, this seems weird. She always answers when I call her… and I mean _always_."

"Great! Then maybe you should stop chasing after some dead girl who's long gone and actually ask Cait out and maybe _then_ we will all be able to kill two birds with one stone!"

"What a great idea," came a very sarcastic answer from the entrance to the cortex and both the guys turned around, seeing Harrison Wells standing there.

"Um… dr. Wells…" Cisco started, giggling briefly before he continued, clearly embarrassed, "I didn't… I mean, I didn't really _mean_ it… I…" He stopped talking on seeing Harry narrowing his eyes at him.

"Guys, guys!" they suddenly heard coming from the main computer by which Barry was now standing. "Cait's gone!"

"Yes, we know that!" Cisco rolled his eyes when coming over to his friend, but then his expression faltered when he saw what the man was seeing. "Oh, my God!"

"What is it? What's happened?" Wells asked and was immediately right there, pushing both the boys aside so he could stand in front of the screen. "Oh, God," he then repeated after Ramon when seeing the feed from the parking garage on which Caitlin looked like she changed her mind and wanted to come back upstairs, completely oblivious to the dark shadow of a man following her. "Wait… is that…?" Harry gasped.

"Ronnie?!" Cisco raised his voice in shock and then he made a few steps back, placing his hands on his head when seeing that their _friend_ was now a speedster as well and most probably evil.

"We have to help her!" Barry seemed to be going out of his mind. "He can hurt her!"

"Ramon," Harry said in a strangely calm tone, though both the younger men knew their boss well enough by now to tell that he was nervous. And worried. In fact, he was also beyond angry as he was watching the part of the video with Caitlin in a loop. Whenever he was truly simmering with rage or working himself up over something, he was always just this calm yet vibrant presence that could be described as the stillness before the storm hit. "Use the satellite to locate Raymond. It should be easy when considering his powers seem to be identical with mine," he finished commanding his employee.

"And then what?" Cisco asked, already bracing himself for the inevitable.

"And then I'll go and get her. I'm gonna need this," Harrison pointed the suit.

Cisco and Barry exchanged glances, knowing that in any other circumstances they would raise their fists into the sky and scream in excitement. But not those circumstances. Right now all that mattered was saving Cait.

* * *

Caitlin was terrified.

In fact, she was panicking and therefore couldn't seem to catch her breath, helplessly struggling against the ties bounding her hands. All that she'd managed to gather so far in her shaky state was that she was somewhere cold and dark, hearing the hum of some generators in the distance. She was sitting down, her arms behind her and tied up to a metal pipe. She couldn't even focus hard enough to figure out how she managed to get here. Had this man – _Ronnie_ , she reminded herself – knocked her out? Because one moment she was facing him in the S.T.A.R. Labs parking garage and the next she was suddenly here, tied up, screaming for help.

And the help wasn't coming.

He could've as well taken her far, far away from Central City. How would her team even find her? Then she remembered that Ronnie seemed to have powers now. Powers so dangerously similar to those she'd already seen in Harry. Did it mean she hadn't actually passed out? Maybe he really did bring her here in a flash and tied up. Maybe ever since she'd been taken merely seconds passed.

She groaned, feeling her throat already sore. She was tired of screaming for help that wasn't coming and would probably not come at all. All she could do, she thought, forcing herself to take a few deep breaths which were ragged so far, but she would get there; was to wait it out. She was sure that once she wouldn't be back with the coffees the team wanted, they would start worrying about her. How long would that take them, though? How long before they'd realize something was wrong?

She tried searching for her bag, but she couldn't see it anywhere. And of course she couldn't. Ronnie was smart enough to rid her of it so she wouldn't try to call for help.

Speaking of…

She rather felt than heard the whoosh of air and he was suddenly right there, standing in front of her, holding said _bag._

_Crap_ , Caitlin thought, starting to struggle, though she knew it was to no avail. All that she'd managed to accomplish so far was successfully chaffing her skin.

"Relax, I'm not going to hurt you, Caity," he finally spoke.

She saw her phone when he raised his hand with the device in it.

"Barry called. A few times, actually," he provided her with the information. "I always thought you two were too close and that it was just weird," he voiced his opinion when squatting down so his face would be at the level with hers.

"He's like a brother to me," she explained, her voice coming out hoarse.

"Oh, that's right," Ronnie nodded, pursing his lips. "Because there's someone else you've always wanted, right? How is good, old dr. Wells these days? Last time I checked he was in a coma. And I think you know how much it pissed me off that you refused to leave S.T.A.R. Labs."

So Ronnie had no idea Harrison was awake and with powers, Snow quickly assessed in her mind. Good. She could work that to her advantage.

"I will never abandon him," she just said.

"Of course. Because you love him, right?" Ronnie snorted, shaking his head. "And that fool never even noticed. Is that really happiness, Caity? Is pining for someone who's never gonna see you the way you want him to, provided he ever wakes up, that is; is that even normal?"

"You know nothing about Harrison and me," she tried defending her own feelings, but then again, why did she? Ronnie was clearly unhinged. She should swallow her fear and try a different approach. She still had no idea what he wanted from her, why he even kidnapped her. He hadn't hurt her so far other than by tying her up, so she should gather as much info about him as she could. "What happened to you?" she asked. "Why couldn't they find you?"

He just smiled in response when getting back to his feet.

"I thought I was dead. I turned the particle accelerator off and what did I get for that? I was hit with something… something _dark_ released from it and… and then I don't really remember much other than picking up running and not being able to stop."

_Interesting_ , Caitlin thought, seeing that Ronnie's story was so much different from Harrison's. Was it because he'd been closer to the accelerator when it exploded? She could find no other explanation since both he and Harry were hit with the same dark energy. Though one just started running fast whereas the other had spent three months in a coma before waking up and discovering his powers.

"You have no idea how long it's taken me to finally return home. To even realize _where_ I ended up," Ronnie continued, by now pacing around the dark room. "By the time I figured out what I could do, everyone back home thought I was dead. And I actually decided to use that to my advantage. I was powerful, right? _I am_ more powerful than anyone in this city. I mean, yes, there are metahumans running around now, but I have superspeed. What can be better than this?" He stopped right in front of her and spread his arms. "I only had one regret."

"Yeah? And what's that?" Caitlin asked.

"You."

She started panicking again on hearing that simple and straight to the point answer and actually praying her team would find her on time. That… that _Harry_ would find her, she realized that if anyone could save her now, it was him. She also knew that the moment he found out she was gone and taken by Ronnie out of all the people, the same man Harrison had suggested once she'd go out with; he would be furious and there would be no force on this earth able to stop him from coming for her.

"How many times do I have to say no to you, Ronnie?" she asked then, just to keep the conversation going, just to buy herself more time. "I meant it the first time around and my answer was never going to change. It sure as hell won't change now."

"Can't you see how perfect we could be together? How powerful?"

"No." She shook her head and the brief smile that flashed on his face disappeared. "I don't, because I already have a team. I have family. Friends. This… this is never going to happen. I mean, look at yourself! You have those amazing powers and what you're doing? Kidnapping me? You could've been out there, saving people, making a difference and instead…"

"Oh, really? Do you think your precious Harrison Wells would do what you just said if he had powers himself? Because something tells me that selfish old fool wouldn't care. He doesn't care about anyone. You should do yourself a favor and just let him go. Leave S.T.A.R. Labs, Cait. You're only rotting there and your career is rotting away with you."

"Actually, I believe in Harrison," she told Ronnie bravely. "And I will never stop. He may be confused about his powers now, but given some time, he will come to accept who he is and I am _sure_ that he will be nothing short of _amazing_ when using them."

Ronnie came to a sudden stop and narrowed his eyes at her. "What are you even talking about? Dude's still in a coma!"

"Actually," they suddenly heard a deep husky voice coming from the shadows, followed by a man stepping from out of there. A man wearing a yellow leather suit with a mask on. "The lady is right."

* * *

_Sometime earlier_

Harrison was pacing back and forth in the cortex, impatiently waiting for Barry and Cisco to finally track Ronnie's speed signature.

What were even the odds? He thought. What could be the odds that both he and Ronnie shared the same or at least similar powers? It wasn't as though the explosion infused everyone in the near vicinity with speed. There were metahumans running around with powers so different from one another that it was safe to assume that the dark matter had a different effect on everyone. Why would the two of them share the speed then? Maybe because they were both in more or less near vicinity of the accelerator? Maybe because they were both in a rush? Harrison didn't know and quite frankly he didn't even care. He was just thinking about it to keep himself from worrying about Snow. And he was practically going crazy working himself up over her being gone. His whole body quite literally _ached_ for him to get out of there, to just _run_ , the speed cursing through his veins, prompting him into action. But he couldn't. Not yet. What would he do anyway? Search every nook and cranny of the whole city? Even when being a speedster, this was impossible to do in a short period of time and he would tire fast and would need to stop and refill with food. He just didn't have the time for that. And he couldn't even be sure that Snow was even being kept in this city! With Raymond having powers, she could be just about anywhere right now, even at the other end of the world!

Harrison ran a hand through his hair once again, messing the brown curls even more, but he didn't care. He just didn't fucking care about anything but keeping her safe and what happened? She was gone! And the worst part was that he was afraid he would never get the chance to tell her what he really felt inside, that he would never get the chance to actually _explain_ why he couldn't… She was too good for him. She would always be too amazing and too good and too pure to even…

He groaned loudly without realizing it.

That was the moment when he suddenly felt someone placing a hand on his shoulder and he came to a stop, facing Allen.

"Did you find her?" he asked.

"No. Not yet, but…"

"Then keep on looking!"

"Harry, Cisco is perfectly capable of doing that himself, ok? I just… I need to tell you something…"

" _What_?" Wells just asked impatiently, facing Barry when folding his arms over his chest. "What could possibly be so important _now_ that Snow is _gone_?"

"You know that she saved your life, but… but you don't know one thing."

"Yeah?"

"You don't know how I found her…"

Few seconds later, Cisco raised his hands up into the air and screamed, "Got it!"

" _Where_?" Harry just asked, turning to his friend and once having given the location, he was just gone.

"Dude!" Cisco called out to Barry, staring at the empty dummy in the cortex. "He took the suit!"

* * *

"Harry!" Caitlin couldn't help it. The moment she saw the man, she just had to scream his name, so happy to see him. In fact, she suspected she might be dreaming, still not able to believe that he was really there, that he came for her and what more, that he was actually wearing the suit Cisco and Barry had made for him. And damn, if he didn't look _good_. And _sexy_.

Ronnie turned to him in surprise, clearly taken aback by his sudden appearance. Wells still had his mask on, so technically the younger man couldn't be sure whether it was really the doctor, but both the newcomer and Caitlin kind of already gave that away.

"A costume? Really?" Raymond actually laughed straight into Wells' face and the man simply ignored him, shifting his eyes to Caitlin.

"Ok?"he just asked her and she nodded, the familiar and deep sound of his voice finally calming her down. Because she believed he could speed them both out of there, that he could get the upper hand when fighting Ronnie.

Only while looking at her, he didn't notice his opponent actually speeding forward with a roar and they both disappeared, crashing against some door with a dull thud and then falling through to the other room.

"Harry!" Caitlin called his name again, actually starting to worry because what if she was wrong? What if Ronnie was the one who would win?

She actually heard a groan coming from that other room that clearly came from Harrison and she started to struggle against the binds, but to no avail. All she accomplished was cutting her skin and feeling blood running down her hands.

She heard another clash and then she was suddenly swept away again, her hands free and… she was standing in the cortex.

Well, no, that was wrong, she suddenly realized. Because she wasn't on her feet at all. In fact, Harrison carried her in his _arms_ , the feel of the leather he was clad in pleasant to the touch.

"Oh, my God, she's on fire!" she suddenly heard Cisco call out and the happy expression he was wearing on his face immediately turned into a terrified one.

Harrison put her down right away and she actually shed the shirt she was wearing because her friend was right. The fabric really caught fire. It hadn't happened when Ronnie had taken her, so she must've assumed Harry's powers were either stronger or slightly different.

Next thing she knew, she stood frozen in the middle of the cortex, her destroyed and discarded shirt on the floor whereas she was only wearing her bra.

Her eyes briefly met Harry's and though he still had the mask on so she couldn't really see his expression, his blues immediately fleeted away, focusing on something, _anything_ else than her standing there half-naked.

Eventually, he spotted something else and he was finally able to rid of the heat that he was suddenly overcame by. "Snow, you're _bleeding_ ," he pointed out.

* * *

Caitlin put the antiseptic away and she reached for the band aid when she stilled, seeing the small bottle suddenly landing on the floor. She frowned, staring at it in surprise.

"Are you all right?" she heard Harry's voice coming from the door and then he was right by her side, picking up the bottle and placing it back on the table.

"Yeah, it's just… I swear… it's like we're living with a ghost. Did you notice those strange things happening around here recently?" she asked him when raising her eyes to his face. He'd changed, now dressed in his usual clothes that were black pants and a black sweater whereas she had a sweat shirt with S.T.A.R. Labs logo already put on.

The bottle on the table was knocked down again, but none of them seemed to notice this time as they eyes locked.

"Here… let me," Harry then said hoarsely when snapping himself out of it and reaching for her hands. "Those cuts are pretty bad, Snow."

Caitlin nearly sighed. Once again they was clearly _something_ passing by between them and he retreated, choosing to focus on something else instead. Why was that? Why did he keep on doing that? She wished she could've understood, but she guessed she would eventually have to just ask about it. The thing was that she was scared to open that particular Pandora's box.

"Harry, what you did for me…" she started when he began to put the band aid on, being unusually gentle with her hands.

"It's only fair, right?" he interrupted her, finishing with her wounds and then raising his eyes to meet hers again. "After what you did for me," he hinted.

"Right…" She nodded, her voice trailing off. "Right…"

Her hand was still in his and eventually he let it go as though he just now realized he still hadn't done that.

"Listen, Snow…" he started just in the same time as she went with, "Listen, Harry…"

They smiled at each other awkwardly.

"May I?" he eventually asked and she nodded, giving him the permission. She had no idea what she was going to say anyway. Her head was spinning and she couldn't find the right words even if she tried to.

"Barry told me about what you did."

Caitlin frowned, trying to figure out what he meant by that.

"I don't…"

"He told me how he… found you," Harrison finally confessed, the tone of his voice significantly changing, a foreign note appearing there.

"I…" Caitlin started and stopped, the blue irises suddenly so close she couldn't seem to remember how to breathe. Ok, she thought, ok… Her heart started beating fast. Way _too_ fast, actually. And Harry was way _too close._ He'd already known before that she saved his life, but what he hadn't known was _how_. And now Barry told him how he found her, going out of her mind, desperately trying to revive him, risking her own life for him because she just couldn't lose him.

Eventually, Harrison followed with, "You know… you make me want to actually be a hero. You were the reason I ran today," he confessed and suddenly, they both seemed to have moved even closer and Caitlin's heart actually stopped beating as she anticipated that Harry might finally kiss her, all her nerves being on fire as she savored the anticipation, as she tried to rule it in when…

He was suddenly gone.

She was standing alone in her lab, completely stupefied that he would run away like this _again_.

"Story of my life," she sighed eventually, wincing at the feel of a bitter disappointment and actually… what followed might've been a broken heart. Because this was one time too many and maybe she finally got the hint that she and Harry were never going to happen. Maybe Ronnie was right. She didn't deserve _this_.

Her morose thoughts and the prickling in her eyes that quickly followed were luckily interrupted when she heard Barry calling her name from the cortex.

She found him staring at his computer screen and when she came closer she noticed he was reading the article about Iris's disappearance again.

"Barry, I'm sorry, but I think you really should just let it go…" she started, but then he just looked at her with a strange expression on his face. His eyes were actually sparkling.

"No, Cait. This… I didn't do this. I was just turning my computer off and… and it flickered back to life and I saw _this_ on the screen."

Caitlin stilled, actually feeling excited for a change and momentarily forgetting about her own devastation of a love life.

"You think that…?" she then started slowly.

"That this little ghost we're having trouble with… is Iris West."

As in response, the screen flickered again and then died.


	5. Chapter 5

Early in the morning they all gathered up back in the cortex, having received the messages Cisco had sent their ways. Needless to say, it was rather awkward between Harry and Caitlin and so far none of them actually looked at the other, just being there, feeling each other's presence stronger than ever but refusing to acknowledge it. Caitlin even started suspecting that the harder they tried to ignore the problem, the worse it would get, but she had to focus on Barry for now since they might've been on the right track regarding the disappearance of Iris West.

"So, let me get this straight," Harrison finally spoke, having listened to Barry's explanation. "You think that all those strange occurrences that have been happening around us so far, all those falling objects… it's this miss West? I'm far from dissuading a theory of poltergeist or a ghost, because with the dark matter being released in this place, just about anything is possible now, but _this_? How can you be sure? And don't tell me it's because of your feelings, Allen, because…"

"Will you keep it down?!" Barry suddenly interrupted. "Man! She can be right around the corner, listening!"

"Like you could get far with an actual ghost," Cisco said and then laughed at his own joke. "Too soon?" he asked sheepishly when everyone else just glared at him.

"Personal feelings aside," Caitlin started when reaching her hand out, "we have to figure it out." For some reason, she could clearly feel Harry's gaze on her _now_ , but she refused to meet his eyes. She would not do that first no matter how much it hurt. He was the jerk who kept running away from her and that wasn't fair since he had superspeed now. "Barry, I'm sorry, but if Iris has been around all this time, it's really no secret that you like this girl. We just need to figure out what exactly happened to her and how to fix it."

"What if she died and is liked… trapped between dimensions? Because of the dark matter?" Cisco suggested. "I'm sorry, Bar, but what if that's true? She had a reason to be here, she was a reporter…"

"She _is_ a reporter," Barry corrected his friend absentmindedly, "and she was here. I was going to talk to her after… um…"

There was sudden silence as they all thought he might've gotten to Iris on time if hadn't been for him coming back for Caitlin and the latter actually felt guilty. Barry had saved Harrison for her and for what? They weren't even near figuring things out between them than they had been _then_.

"Cait, hey," Barry immediately addressed her, seeing the expression on her face, "I don't regret coming back for you two," he then glanced at Harry. "I don't really know this girl. I never really knew her, but… but I wanted to. It's all."

"I still don't understand how you can be so sure that it's her?" Harry asked again and this time his voice sounded exasperated.

"Because of the article that popped on my computer the moment I shut it down," Barry explained.

"Um… and that's science how?"

"Stop being so skeptical," Cisco chastised him."Seriously, man! Sometimes I fail to get you! You got out of a coma! You are all right and on top of that you got superspeed now! You should be _grateful_ that it's turned out so good for you because others weren't as fortunate!"

"He's actually right, you know." Caitlin couldn't help it. The words were out of her moth before she could stop them and then she was looking into those blue eyes and she stilled, feeling some kind of peace settling over her. This man either had this effect on her or he could just as easily make her furious.

"Okaaaaay…" Cisco said slowly, looking from one to the other. "Okay… I don't know what's with you two, but I need both of your heads in the game, ok? We gotta figure this out!"

"I'm still gonna need some proof," Harry said, folding his arms over his chest when shifting his eyes back to Barry.

"Fine!" Cisco exclaimed when raising both his eyes and hands to the sky. "If you really are Iris West, give us a sign!" he screamed and they all raised their eyebrows at that, ready to laugh him off when… the nearest computer just went up in flames.

* * *

The three guys disappeared to somewhere right after Harry put the fire down, being the fastest of them all. Caitlin kind of felt left out with nothing to do since they all wanted to try out some idea Harrison had, for the first time since he'd woken up truly looking excited that he would get to practice something well-known to him. Snow couldn't really help much with physics, her own input always being bio-chemical, but then again she also chose not to go after them because she needed some distance. Maybe to think. Or maybe now the only way out of this situation was just confronting the man and demanding an answer no matter how much it might hurt her in the end. She knew she would have to do it in order to find a way back to her own self because recently she'd just been feeling like she'd been losing that, getting herself too worked up and too lost in his person and it wasn't even physical. She needed to put an end to this, she needed to regain her balance, to come back to her axis because truth be told, for the last few months she'd been thrown out of it, barely standing.

They said when you lost your ground, you learnt to fly, but she was pretty sure that in her case it just meant that she was plain losing herself and getting addicted to another human being. And she couldn't do that. She couldn't bet everything she had, her entire happiness on one person. It was too much pressure on Harry and he didn't deserve that either. So, in the end, she forced herself to do some studying of her own field of expertise and once she started, it actually felt liberating. She truly began to feel like herself again, just spending time with herself, being happy with her research, feeling herself calm down inside.

Until the boys came back, that was and she heard Cisco calling her in an exciting voice.

"What's that?" she asked when entering the cortex and seeing the strange device they brought in and placed on the desk now rid of a computer.

"This is a frequency adjustor," Harrison said proudly as though he kind of found himself again as well and it brought a surprising smile to her face. She was glad he'd gotten to forget about his own problems for a few moments and do something he loved and was familiar with for a change.

"I still think it's a terrible name and I could do you one better," Cisco complained.

"Well, you're not the one who came up with the idea! I did!" Harry argued and again, the tone of his voice, the banter between those two that ensued seemed so familiar it actually make Cait feel happier. It was as though things might be finally slowly getting back to normal.

"Ok, what does it do?" she wanted to know, now very curious about how they were going to help Iris.

"Miss West seems to be wandering around the halls of this building, disappearing and appearing, managing to sometimes affect some things and sometimes probably not…" Harrison started, the tone of his voice soothing and familiar. It actually reminded Caitlin of how she'd used to love to listen to him whenever he'd been explaining something in the Labs back when it'd been up and running. The awkward tension between them was gone now and they both seemed to be relieved about that, too, now focused at the task at hand. "It was a wild guess, but I figured that maybe the dark matter affected her body at a cellular level, causing said cells to become all out of whack, moving between different frequencies... sometimes becoming stronger, other times weaker…"

Snow frowned, trying to understand it the right way. Eventually, she asked, "So you think that finding the right frequency might put her back together?"

"Maybe. Probably not. But we may be able to hear her. Maybe even see her."

"But what if you're wrong?"

"Snow, please!" Again, he turned to her with such a familiar expression on his face that this time her heart ached, feeling the tension back. Or maybe it was just the memories flooding her mind of all the times she'd dared question him for the sake of him getting all worked up over explaining to her why he was right. "Just observe, will you?" he eventually settled for with a heavy sigh and then looked away and back to the device. "Ramon, ready?"

"Born ready!" Cisco answered with a bright smile on his face.

Caitlin located Barry and she actually registered how nervous he was, pacing back and forth, playing with his fingers.

"Barry, it's gonna be…" she started and then came to a sudden stop, her eyes opening widely because suddenly… there was a transparent person standing in the middle of the cortex and just where Barry was walking. It actually looked like she was standing _in_ him, only as a ghost would.

Cisco barely stifled the outburst of laughter when Barry noticed the apparition and stilled before jumping away as though Iris burnt him, horrified that he might actually step _into_ her.

"Wow!" he yelled, by now standing right next to Harry and Cisco and staring. Caitlin quickly came closer, aligning with the three men and was watching the woman in front of them in awe.

"You have no idea how good it is to actually be seen, guys!" Iris West spoke. "But still, I can't touch anything…" she then complained when walking over to a desk and reaching for the device but her hand just flew through it.

"I guess that one is up for our dear dr. Snow to figure out," Harrison said in a soft voice and Caitlin's heart thumped harder at the clear conviction there.

"Um… yeah… I… I'll try?" she eventually said, pretty embarrassed.

"The problem now is clearly biological," he followed. "We got her back, but there must be something chemical in her body that is still out of whack."

"And how do you suggest I take a blood sample or run any kind of tests if I can't even touch her?" Caitlin asked, stupefied, truly never before facing such a problem. The dark matter was really something else, wasn't it?

"Maybe she could just learn how to make herself more corporeal?" Cisco suggested, scratching his head. "Even if just for a moment so Cait could take her sample?"

"Gee, dude, if it were that easy… Anyways," Iris just now realized she was still talking to strangers. "I guess I should introduce myself. Where are my manners? I'm Iris West."

"Hi, I'm Iris West," Barry was the first one to reach his hand to her and say that and then he froze as the rest of them, including Iris herself. Needless to say, laughter followed from anyone but the poor guy.

"Dude!" Cisco just yelled.

"I mean… yeah… I'm _not_ Iris West… obviously… because that's _you_. I'm Barry Allen," he finally finished, taking his hand away and making a step back, his face all red.

Iris actually smiled at him merrily. "Nice to meet you, Barry."

"I'm Caitlin Snow and as you heard, a doctor in bio-chem and bio-engineering."

"Cisco Ramon, engineer."

"Dr. Harrison Wells…"

"…the Flash?" Iris asked and they were all rendered speechless.

"The what now?" Harry was the one to ask that first.

"Um… I'm sorry. It's the reporter in me," West quickly apologized. "Also, I know I was peeking a lot…" she hesitated, shifting her eyes from Barry and then to Cait and finally to Harrison as she couldn't truly figure everything out just yet, "though not for long. Just saw bits and pieces, but I remember you being the newest speedster clearly. I hope I'll be back to my corporeal form, as you say, to be able to break the story! This name is amazing, don't you think?! Because you come and go in a flash?"

Harry didn't say anything to that, just running his hand over his mouth.

"Why don't we focus on getting you back first?" Snow suggested, seeing that he was actually retreating, clearly with the intention to leave the cortex. "Why don't you, guys, work with her for a bit, ok?" She then turned to Cisco and Barry, seeing the older man already gone. "I'll be right back!"

She went after him. She was just about ready to put an end to this silliness. It was now or never. Otherwise she might not be able to actually focus enough on Iris West, so she could help the poor girl.

"Harry! Harrison, wait!" she called his name and finally, she caught him by the elevators. "Well, I guess it's a good thing you didn't use your speed when running from me _this_ _time_ ," she then added sarcastically when he just turned to her in exasperation.

"Snow… I…" he started, but she lifted a finger at him.

"Let me, ok? I need to say something."

He opened his mouth, but then he must've changed his mind, because he closed it right back and sighed. He did nod in silent agreement, though.

"I'm sick of this situation, Harry," she started slowly, carefully, looking at him bravely, but seeing him avoiding her eyes. "We have to talk about it, because I don't know how else we can just work together…"

"Snow, this is really not the right time," he cut.

"And where will it be?" she just asked him, refusing to let it go. "I am tired, Harrison, ok?!" His eyes opened wider as she raised her voice and then he finally looked at her. "Why do you keep running away from me?!" she demanded to know.

"This is really not…" he tried one more time.

"Harry!" she screamed his name and rendered him unable to say anything else. In the end, he didn't use his speed, but he did send her a sad and apologetic look before turning on his heels and leaving.

"Harry! Don't you dare walk away from me!" she still yelled after him, but he didn't listen and that was it. She felt the tears prickling her eyes. This was just too much. She couldn't understand why he was doing it, why he refused to talk to her. If what he wanted to say was that he didn't feel the same, then it would still be better than _this_. She needed the truth, no matter how painful it would be, so she could put her life back together.

* * *

Caitlin somehow ended up in her lab, crying her eyes out and feeling so ashamed of it that she hated her own self. Because clearly, Harrison wasn't worth her tears. Yet, she couldn't help it. She couldn't help loving him. She had for quite some time despite him bringing her nothing but pain. Maybe it would be easier to hate him, but if she did, then what? Would she leave the Labs? Abandon him and her two amazing friends? Because she couldn't handle her _feelings_? She was stronger than this, damn it! She loved this job and she loved this team and she was so staying!

"Um… sorry," she suddenly heard Iris apologize and she jumped in her seat, quickly wiping the tears from her face, though she knew it was all futile. Iris had already seen everything there was to see. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to be the peeping Tom again… God, this last few months has truly turned me into a spy, hah?" she tried joking and finally, Cait did smile at the girl a little.

"It's ok. I'll get easy on you," she promised, "just because I can't imagine what you must've been going through."

"Yeah… the first few weeks were the hardest," Iris confessed. "I kept on screaming, waving my hands in front of people and… nothing. I was so angry and then I was crying all the time and… I truly thought I was dead and being this ghost was punishment for something I didn't even remember doing because what do you have to do in order to deserve _this_?"

Caitlin saddened again, realizing the magnitude of the guilt Harry must've been feeling because…

"I'm sorry," she then said, "in dr. Wells's name. It's all his doing, isn't it?"

"Well, it's not like he knew it would happen. He couldn't have. So I guess it was just an accident."

"Yeah," Caitlin agreed when grabbing a tissue and wiping her nose. Maybe her falling for him was an accident, too. A very unfortunate one.

"You know, I just saw him in his office," Iris then provided the information. "And I know, I know, I need to stop sneaking around, but for my defense I was trying to see whether I can will myself out and back and… it worked. "

"It did?" Caitlin got interested. "That's amazing, Iris!"

"Yeah, whatever that device did to me, it must've stabilized me somehow… Anyways, he was trying to work and then he just kept on sighing and he took his glasses off, rubbing on his eyes. There's something on his mind and something tells me it's you…"

"Um… what?" This time Caitlin had no idea how to react. She didn't really know Iris whereas the woman seemed to already know everything there was to know about the team. It was strange and confusing and… Caitlin should have maybe given the woman a piece of her mind, but then again, how could she, really? If she was in Iris's shoes, she was sure she wouldn't resist the temptation and peek as well. At least Iris was brave enough to admit it.

"I don't want to pry, but…" the woman then hesitated before going on, seeing that Cait didn't protest, "what is the deal with you, Barry and dr. Wells?"

"What?" This was unexpected. "What do you mean by the three of us?"

"Is this some kind of a bizarre love triangle?" Iris followed. "I wasn't here all the time, but I did see you and Barry being very close and then were those moments with you and dr. Wells and… I think I'm just confused, is all."

Caitlin was still staring at the woman, stupefied.

Finally, she composed herself and made it clear, "There wasn't, isn't and never will be anything between me and Barry. He's like a brother to me. He's the best friend I could've ever asked for, but nothing more. I don't have feelings for him. God, no!"

"Because you're in love with dr. Wells."

"That obvious, hah?" Snow only sighed, burying her face in her hands.

"And you were crying because of him?"

"Yeah. He's… God, he can be such a jerk sometimes that I wonder why I even have those feelings in the first place!"

"We can't choose the ones we fall in love with, I guess," Iris said and then took a seat.

That caused Caitlin to stir.

"Oh, my God! Don't move!" she called to the girl and got on her feet.

"What?" Iris seemed confused.

"You're corporeal! I need to take that blood sample before you lose it!"

Iris froze, surprised by that discovery herself, a smile suddenly appearing on her face and then tears in her eyes.

"Oh, my God, Caitlin! It's… it's so amazing!"

The moment Snow took the sample, Iris got up and threw her arms around the woman.

"I'm sorry," she said straight into her ear, "it's just been a while since I could feel human touch. Oh…" Next thing Cait new, the embrace disappeared and Iris was transparent again.

"Don't worry," Cait comforted the girl. "We have this. We'll figure it out!" She raised the hand with the vial full of blood.

"Thank you. And just a note of advice… before you do get down to it, find that jerk and settle things between you two once and for all. The both of you deserve it because he's clearly as bothered by this whole situation as you are."

"As long as you promise not to peek," Caitlin tried joking, really not feeling like following that advice.

"Cait, I'm serious. I will not peek, but you _have_ to go talk to him."

"No need," they suddenly heard Harrison's voice coming from the door and both turned in that direction to see him standing there. "I'm here. I know you deserve the truth, Snow." When saying that, he looked strangely small and vulnerable and Caitlin swallowed hard, bracing herself for what was to come. Iris, on the other hand, walked right through the wall, disappearing. "Useful skill," Harry said in approval once she disappeared.

"Really? Because you have some pretty awesome skills yourself and yet, you still refuse to make use of them," Caitlin said harshly when turning around to put the vial safely on its place. Maybe she was a little too hard on him, but she didn't care.

"Ok, I admit. I deserved that," Harry agreed with her and she turned back to him in surprise. He was just standing there, his hands stuck into the pockets of his pants. "But I did save you, didn't I?"

"And that just reminds me of another problem we're facing that is Ronnie." She sighed. "So maybe you were right. Maybe we shouldn't talk about us." Wait… _us_? Why did she have to put it like _that_?!

"But we have to. You were right. You deserve to be treated with respect, Caitlin and I failed majorly when not delivering," he told her calmly. It actually surprised her that he was willing to lay it all out on the table.

"Ok, then," she agreed, folding her arms over her chest in a defensive gesture. "I'll bite. Why are you constantly running away from me?" she asked one more time.

"Because I don't deserve you," the answer came and she frowned. What the hell was that supposed to mean?

"I'm sorry?"

" _I am_ the one who's sorry," he told her, taking his hands out of his pockets and spreading them, then bringing them up to mess his curls in a nervous gesture. "I'm sorry for the way I've been treating you lately. In fact, I'm sorry for the way I _always_ treated you, Snow. I'm sorry for not acting up on my… ah," he then came to a stop and sighed heavily. "The truth is that you are my conscience," he confessed just then in an honest voice, meeting her eyes bravely.

"What's that supposed to mean?" she asked, still with a frown, because the more he said, the more confused she actually was. "Harry, all I want to know is why you always run away from me when things get… you know." She just couldn't say it, damn it!

"Real?" he finished for her.

"Yes!" she admitted, gesturing with her hands and raising her voice. "As I think of it, you were _always_ running away from me just when we started to get closer! It was either that or trying to push me into the arms of another man!"

There was sudden silence as she spoke that truth out loud, just waiting for him to retreat, to disappear. Yet, he didn't. He was still there, facing her.

"Now you're just taking running to a whole new level and I'm starting to think maybe that is exactly why you're a speedster," she tried for a lighter tone, but it didn't work. He didn't laugh and nor did she. They were just there, the atmosphere heavy, still so full of unspoken things between them.

"I already told you the truth. I don't deserve you. And you deserve _better_. It's that simple."

"No!" she disagreed, shaking her head. "It's not. You don't tell me what or whom I deserve! Only _I_ can do that and I want yo…!" she came to a sudden stop, but it was too late anyways. He already guessed perfectly what she was going to say.

"I am not the man you think I am, Snow," he simply said then.

" _Again_ , Harry," she nearly hissed, "what is _that_ supposed to mean, damn it?!"

"That I took the risk!" he suddenly screamed, rendering her speechless because so far he'd kept himself calm. Her pupils enlarged, so he took it down a notch. "I never said anything. I never said anything to anyone, even those close to me, even _you_ , even Ramon! But I _knew_ there was a possibility that the particle accelerator would explode. I knew it, Caitlin and I didn't care. I just kept telling to myself that sometimes when you couldn't find a key, you had to kick open the door. And that's what I did." He spread his hands, looking defeated, "I kicked it. So I am _not_ a good man, Caitlin and you don't deserve this," he pointed himself and there was sudden silence during which she was digesting his words, this confession of his, her eyes opened widely, her heart thumping wildly in her chest. Because she'd just heard Iris say it wasn't dr. Wells's fault. It wasn't as though he'd _known_ what would happen. Only he had. He had known there was _risk_. And he'd done it anyway.

Then, after a long moment of silence during which Caitlin was deep in thoughts, processing, just when Harrison lost his hope that she would speak and was readying himself to leave, she finally said, "You _are_."

"What?" he asked with a frown. She was surely admitting him right. She was probably telling him he wasn't good enough. It had to be that, right?

"A good man," she made it clear. "You _are_."

He closed his eyes, an unexpected pain shooting straight through his heart. Because she couldn't be serious. She couldn't have this much faith in him after _everything_ he'd just told her.

"I never cared about anything and anyone in my life, Snow," he seemed to be adamant on proving her wrong, "so I could never deserve someone like you no matter what I truly feel for you. How deeply…" He came to a stop just then, closing his eyes and wincing again. And hear heart was just filled with hope at the sight.

"So you knew there was danger," she slowly began again. "Ok. You made the wrong decision there, but you can still make the right one now. Do better. Save as many people as you can. Use those powers for good. You already saved me," she reminded him. "You didn't want the suit. You didn't want to be a hero, but you did come for me. That _has_ to count for something. You can still undo the damage you have done. I believe in you, Harrison."

When he met her eyes just then, his heart truly broke. She was just telling him all he'd ever wanted to hear from her. She was accepting him for who he was, she was accepting his mistakes without trying to change them or him, without finding any excuses. She wanted him just the way he was, with all of his flaws and she believed in him. It was too much. And then she had to say it again, "I still believe in you Harry. I did then and I always will. That will _never_ change. I think you're selling yourself too short. Besides, if you truly were the bad man you paint yourself to be, don't you think you'd be taking everything and anything you wanted without consequences? And here we are," she spread her hands, looking bravely into his astonished blues, "you're still holding back. You don't just take what you desire, don't you? How many times exactly did you try to convince me I would be a better match for someone else than you? That I would be happy with Ronnie? And look at yourself now. You are a hero whereas he is the one who needs to be stopped. If you didn't care at all, you also wouldn't care for Cisco or Barry or Iris just now. You wouldn't have built this whole S.T.A.R. Labs empire to improve people's lives. You took a risk. You lost. But we all make bad decisions sometimes and they don't mean we're bad people."

There was sudden silence as they were just looking at each other.

And then, Harrison finally moved, walking towards her purposefully, cupping her face into his hands and simply pressing his lips against hers in their first kiss. And it was _everything_ she'd ever dreamt of and so, so much _more._ At first his lips brushed against hers gently, tenderly, his smell invaded her nostrils, her body responding immediately, set on fire. At the touch of him she felt peace again as though the stars and the universe finally aligned in a perfect harmony, bringing them together, an overwhelming feeling of this being right washing over them both, forming a bond that seemed unbreakable now that the first step was finally taken, that there were no barriers and no lies and no understatements between them anymore. Caitlin knew this was the _right_ man for her as she relished the kiss that grew deeper, his tongue moving along her lower lip and then prying her mouth open, joining her own, dancing around with it. She moaned, bringing her hands to his face as well and then burying them in his soft messy curls, crashing her body against his, feeling even more of his heat and his overwhelming presence. She could feel his ragged breath and then…

"What was _that_?" she gasped as their lips parted after she felt something amazing and so improbable her head started to spin even more.

"Sorry, I guess…" he said sheepishly, "I got a little… excited?" She spotted a nervous smile on his face as he moved away a little so he could look into her eyes. "It's my powers."

"Vibrating lips, hah?" she teased him with a smile, placing her hand on his cheek and stroking the skin there gently. "I guess you're gonna have to show me later what other thing you _vibrate_."

They both chuckled and then they locked their eyes together again. "Don't ever be sorry," she assured him, her voice growing serious again as she stroked his cheeks with both of her hands. "For anything."

"Thank you. For believing in me," he responded in a hoarse voice. "For… not giving up."

" _Always_ ," she assured him and they were just about to crash again when…

The door suddenly burst open and this time it wasn't Iris peeking.

"Wow!" Barry screamed when coming to a sudden stop. "Guys, I'm so… so sorry! It's just that… we got a problem!"

Harrison rolled his eyes.

 


	6. Chapter 6

Caitlin's head was spinning when she and Harry followed Barry into the cortex. She knew she should be focusing on the task at hand, on what was happening and how they could help, but all she could think about was that kiss. And what a hell of a kiss it was! By the time she came to a stop right by Harry's side in the middle of the cortex, facing Cisco who was sitting behind a console and Iris who was standing nearby with a confused and lost look on her face; Caitlin was breathless and truth be told, she wasn't sure what caused this state. Whether it was the kiss she still couldn't seem to recover from, now keeping a close distance to Harrison just because she felt like she finally could, like all those unspoken things had finally been resolved between them and they could maybe move forward and… and what? Be together? Her whole world spun even more as she realized what it meant. No more pain and no more heartache, just blissful happiness by the side of the man she'd been in love with for months! Though she knew it wouldn't be easy. If so, it would be so, so complicated when taking into account the newest developments with his powers, the Labs being ruined and all the metahumans on the loose. But she was all right with it as long as they were just together.

"What's up?" Harry asked Cisco and Caitlin noticed Iris's expression. The girl looked from her to the man by her side and then back to her until she finally raised her thumbs up. Snow really wanted to roll her eyes at that, but in the end she couldn't help it and she simply smiled. She was just too damn happy.

"There's been a meta alert. We have trouble," Cisco informed.

"Is it Ronnie?" Caitlin asked and she could already feel Harrison's gaze on her.

"No. Some dude who seems to be extra strong since he's just pulled a metal door off its hinges. Bank robbery in progress… Um… Listen, Harry…" Cisco then hesitated, suddenly remembering that the man was clear on how he didn't want to be a hero, but to the surprise of the whole team – well, except Snow – he just said, "I'm gonna suit up."

Cisco opened his eyes widely in surprise as Wells suddenly disappeared from Caitlin's side and then reappeared next to his younger friend, wearing the suit.

And damn, Cait thought, watching him in that leather, did he look hot!

"Tell me where," Harry just turned to Cisco when folding his arms across his chest, the leather becoming tighter. He caught Snow watching him and once she met his blues, she saw the amused expression on his face. She was most definitely caught red-handed as he knew exactly why she was staring. She had half a mind to tell him not to take the suit off once they were finally alone again, but she refrained herself from her fantasies. They'd only barely kissed once. She wouldn't just jump him like some animal… but then again, why not?

"Earth to Caitlin?" Cisco's voice reached her like through a broken connection. "M.d. Caitlin Snow!"

She finally shook her head and looked at her friend, noticing that Harry was long gone.

"Seriously, girl! What's with you?" Cisco wanted to know. "Wait a second…!" He then got up, pushing the chair behind as he stared with his finger pointed at her.

"Dude! They were totally going at it when I went to find them!" Barry informed happily.

"Barry!" Caitlin chastised him.

"What?!" he just asked her with a shrug. "It's about bloody time!"

And just then she saddened, her enthusiasm dropping. Because no matter how happy she was with the outcome of what had happened between her and Harry, there was still this issue of him knowing the risk of the particle accelerator exploding and going through with his plan anyway. She knew him all too well, she knew the person he was at his core and she forgave him, understanding that people made mistakes, even good people, even mistakes that had the potential to ruin other people's lives, but… what would Barry and Cisco think once Harrison told them? Not to mention Iris? What would they say when knowing that their beloved mentor, the man they'd risked their entire careers for and stuck around in the Labs for, wasn't as perfect as they painted him to be? Caitlin was scared out of the sudden that in the end she would be forced to actually choose between her friends and the man she couldn't live without and she really did not want to have to do that. She'd better start figuring out a way for them all to accept that Harry was just human and he made mistakes like everyone else. She would have to convince them he was worth forgiving… Then again, as much as she believed Cisco would eventually come around, she was worried about Barry just because Iris, the girl he liked so much, was affected by the accelerator herself.

Still, for now, they had other problems like the bank robbery.

"Damn it!" Iris just now spoke when coming loser to Cisco's computer and looking at the screen. "Can you guys help me come back to work? I need to break this story!"

Caitlin was actually grateful for that distraction since it gave her something to do and prolonged the inevitable talk she and Harrison would have to have with the team.

"Right," she said, nodding. "I'll head to my lab and see what I can cook up for you, ok? In the meantime…" she hesitated, "Iris, why don't you practice those powers of yours?"

"Practice?" the girl raised her eyebrows at that, not getting Caitlin's point. "Wait… you mean that this… this is gotta stick?"

Barry hesitated when looking from one woman to the other.

"Well, I'm pretty sure of that," Caitlin confirmed. "The change happened directly in your DNA. I can work on a concoction that would stabilize your cells and make it possible for you to have a normal life again, but I'm sure those powers will stay. You will just be able to use them like… like Harry used his. Or every other metahuman."

For a moment there was silence as they all waited for Iris's answer and then, to their astonishment, she nearly squealed, "So I'm gonna be a reporter who can turn invisible?! Awesome!" She jumped up and down in excitement.

"Well… yeah… I'm not sure how that one will work since you do need some work integrity as well…" Cisco hesitated, looking at Barry.

"I know," Iris agreed. "But it doesn't mean I can't take down some scumbags who clearly deserve it in the meantime! Facing an arms dealer to expose him can be dangerous and this way… I can actually do something good, right?"

"As long as you don't cross the line, I suppose," Caitlin agreed and was just about to turn and finally head for her lab when Cisco called after her.

"Hey! Wait! We're not done! What's with you and Harry?"

"Major lip lock," Barry provided the info. "So on their best way!"

"This is really not the time," Cait just said when heading to the exit.

"But, hey! Did you serve him a speech about being a hero or something? Because last time I checked he didn't want to even hear of getting himself out there!" Cisco refused to let it go. "So? What kind of a push did you give him?"

"None, actually," Caitlin told him when stopping in the exit. "I just told him I always believed in him and that to me he already is one."

"You totally reversed psychology him!"

"Um, no," Snow denied again with a frown. "It's called support, Cisco. I would be fine with whatever decision he made because I simply support him. I'm not here to change his mind, but to respect it." After that, she finally left, directing herself to her lab to work on the cure for Iris.

There was silence as Snow left and Cisco scratched his head. "Is it just me or she makes us feel like she's years ahead of us? I mean, she's not _that_ much older than I am! She's your age, dude!" He then turned to Barry.

"I think you still have a lot to learn about relationships, Cisco," his friend just said when patting his shoulder. "That's probably why you're still single," he then joked and ran away from Cisco once the guy got mad.

"That wasn't very nice! Besides, last time I checked you were single, too!" Ramon raised his eyes to Iris and Barry was already opening his mouth, saying a silent no, begging the guy not to do or say something stupid, but then he breathed out in relief when all that he heard was, "Hey, just because you can't come back to work right now doesn't mean you can't write. Help yourself! There's a free computer out there," Cisco pointed the other side of the cortex when talking to the girl. "You can practice your powers and write an article, what do you say? Blogging is very fashionable these days."

"Oh, yes! You're totally right!" Iris raised her voice in excitement. "Thank you! I actually do have a blog. I've been inactive ever since I got an actual reporting job, but I'm totally coming back to it now! What's the news on the Flash?"

"The Flash," Cisco repeated as though he was trying it out on his tongue. "I like that, girl! Me approve! Let's see… oh…"

"Oh?" Barry raised his eyebrows at that.

"His vitals are normal, judging by the sensors I put into his suit and the meta is definitely down, but… yeah… he did get hit pretty hard and that dude… he had like superstrength! I judge a few broken rips. Dr. Snow to the rescue?" he then hinted, his tone significant.

"Dude, just… don't." Barry winced. "I've seen enough. I don't need another show!"

* * *

Caitlin smiled brightly as she checked the concoction one more time and deduced it was ready to admit to Iris. After this, she would still have to adjust to those powers of hers, but she would be able to lead a normal life or… as normal as it got after such a major change. Though, despite the terrible thing that had happened to her, Snow already saw how positive Iris seemed to be about the change and how excited that she would be able to achieve more as a reporter. And if the team was worried about her overusing those powers like some – or most of – metahumans out there, then they would definitely be there for her to pull her back.

Yes, Caitlin tried to convince herself as she put the syringe aside, everything would be all right because it just had to be. They'd been through enough of bad things. Only good must've been left now, right?

As though in answer, she heard a groan coming from the door.

"Nice to see you happy," she then heard Harry's gasp and she immediately turned around, seeing him stumble into her lab in his suit still on. Well, this wasn't exactly what she had in mind when she wanted him to come back to her wearing this…

"My, my, dr. Snow. I didn't peg you for being this dirty," he joked when she reached for him and helped him to a lab bed.

"Did I just say that aloud?" she asked, realizing her mistake.

"Yes. And please, don't be sorry. I'm glad you did," he assured her in a husky voice as she suddenly found herself standing directly in front of him sitting. Their faces were on the same level now and she made a step forward without even realizing it as his arms went around her and his lips crashed against her own, kissing her again, just needing to feel her mouth moving over his again and to taste her…

When she put her arms around his neck, forgetting he seemed to be injured and then came even closer, pressing her body into his, he groaned, breaking the kiss.

"Oh, my God!" She immediately moved away. "I'm so sorry! Where does it hurt? What is even wrong?" She was just looking at him, stupefied when seeing the amused expression on his face. "Harrison?"

"Nothing." He smiled to her when shaking his head. "You're just so cute when you worry. And don't. The kiss didn't hurt me. In fact, I enjoyed it very, very much. My ribs, though… I think they might start to set back by now."

"You broke your ribs?! Get this thing off _now_!" she quickly called out to him, not even knowing where the zipper on this suit was. There was truly no time to waste because she so did not want to have to break his bones in order for them to reset properly.

"I can't…" he gasped when reaching behind and then giving up. "Can you maybe, please, help?"

This would be hot if it wasn't for the circumstances and they both saw that. Caitlin immediately moved to his back and finally found the zipper, pulling it down and then carefully peeling the upper part of his suit away, exposing the undershirt he wore. He couldn't seem to raise his arms above his head just yet, so she had to cut the fabric off of him and finally, she saw the purple bruises scattered all over his chest.

"Harry!" she gasped in horrification.

"What? Guy had superstrength!"

"Aha. And where is he now?" she asked when gently pressing the palm of her hand against his bruised ribs, checking if they were setting right.

"Thanks to Cisco's power dampening cuffs he'd come up with while I was in a coma, the police took the meta into custody. They're already in a process of building a special dampening prison for those kinds of criminals."

"Good to know," Caitlin said with a nod, still running her hand gently along his flesh. To her relief, everything was back on its right place and she just watched in awe as the bruising slowly disappeared. Her hand then stopped right above his heart, feeling it thump widely in his chest. "Your heart beats really fast," she said just then and met his eyes.

"It's because you have that effect on me," he told her in complete honesty and then his hand was covering her own over his heart, securing it there against his flesh. "Are you sure about this, Caitlin?" he asked out of the sudden.

"What do you mean?" she wanted to know, frowning.

"This. Us. Are you _sure_? Because one this happens… once we're together… I'm not sure I will ever be strong enough to let yo…" His words were cut off as she suddenly leaned forward, kissing him, hoping this was enough of an answer for him.

This time he wasn't in any pain so he let her hand go and put his arms around her, closing her in his strong and hot embrace as their lips collided, tongues battled and tasted and explored. Before she knew it, she was completely pressed up against him, her arms around his neck, her hands then burying in the soft curls of his hair, his legs on each side of her as he pulled her even closer…

Eventually, they stopped to catch a breath, forehead leaning against forehead, heavy pants released from their mouth.

"That was…" he gasped.

"Yes, it was," she agreed when placing her hand on the side of his face and stroking his skin gently. Then she leaned back so she could look into his eyes, her second hand landing on his other cheek, reaching further to brush his hair.

"We really need to go on a proper date," he suggested, resting his hands in the crooks of her elbows.

She smiled at him brightly. "Yes, dr. Wells. We should most definitely do that," she agreed happily. "But first I need to give Iris the cure."

"Of course. And I… I need to change into my own clothes."

"Oh, you don't have to bother," Caitlin threw his side when turning away to grab the syringe abandoned earlier.

"There is it again. I really like that seductive side of you, dr. Snow," he teased her just then.

"Oh, dr. Wells, you have seen nothing yet," she assured him when grabbing the object and leaving the lab.

And truth be told, she left him in quite an embarrassing position because his pants were too tight now.

* * *

When Harrison finally joined the team in the cortex, the article was already online and the solution Caitlin had come up with was cursing through Iris's veins. Right now they all waited for it to take effect.

Cait smiled at him when he entered the room, wearing all black from head to toe again. She immediately reached for his hand and he took it willingly, their fingers intertwining together as they stood there, waiting to see some progress.

Barry smiled at Caitlin when seeing her and Harry holding on to each other and she smiled right back, though it was a little forced, because she could feel the heavy weight settling in her stomach again. Eventually, Harrison would have to come clear about the accelerator and she was really dreading that.

"Guys, I think… I think it worked!" Iris then gasped, looking at her hand as she flexed her fingers. "I lost myself halfway through my article and then it's taken me twenty minutes to get it back, but now… I feel like I'm finally whole." She flashed them a smile.

Barry was the first one to walk over to her and reached his hand to her.

"Hi, I'm Barry Allen," he introduced himself again, this time getting everything right and Cait smiled at that happily. Maybe in the end, he would finally get the chance with the girl he was crazy about, after all. Maybe everything would somehow work itself out.

Iris smiled at him brightly, amusement clear in her expression as she shook the offered hand. "Iris West. It's so nice to meet you, Barry. Actually, if I recall correctly, you've been wanting to meet me for quite some time."

"Um…" Barry's face immediately flashed crimson and he made a step back, bringing his hand to his head and scratching nervously. "Yeah… about that… listen… I wanted to say something back in the Jitters…"

"I remember you, you know?" she cut in just then. "You were one of my regulars."

"You do?" He seemed surprised by that. "Well… that's… that's… great… I guess… I guess I was too slow."

"Why don't I make you a deal," she suggested. "How about…?" Only she was stopped by the computer she just left beeping, indicating she got mail. "Just give me a sec!" She ran to the station and then squealed with excitement. "My boss is reaching out! He wants to know where I've been… God, I need to head down to the office! I just… I have no idea what I'm going to tell him!"

Barry's smile faded away as he realized that something else stole Iris's entire attention. Yet, he still suggested, "You might've been hit with the explosion and wandering around with no memories?"

"That!" She pointed her finger at him. "I can work with that!"

"I can produce some medical papers for you if you like," Caitlin immediately offered, "saying you were here this whole time, in the Labs, maybe in a coma like dr. Wells or maybe just not remembering anything?"

"And you, guys, haven't managed to identify me?" Iris frowned. "I'm afraid this won't hold water."

"Hey, you were a brand new reporter and we might have not seen you on that webpage nor read that day's newspaper when they announced your disappearance… We will figure something up! No worries!" Cisco tried calming her down. "Or we may say you were being kept in quarantine and couldn't contact the outside world!"

"Thanks, guys! You're the best! I'll roll with something once I get there and then I'll call for the medical papers! Bye!" And just like that, Iris West was gone.

"Well… that went well," Barry sighed when scratching his head again.

"Barry, don't worry. There's clearly something there and we could all see it," Caitlin comforted him when letting go of Harry and walking over to her friend to touch his shoulder briefly. "You just need to give her some time. Her whole world just turned upside down. She'll be fine and then you'll be able to make a move."

Barry nodded, yet, he still seemed unconvinced. Caitlin thought she really needed to work on his confidence because like for such a great guy, he had none.

"Now," Harry then spoke in a hesitant voice, "before you all head home for the well-deserved rest, there's something I have to tell you. I can't keep it a secret any longer."

Caitlin turned back to him and then simply made her way to his side and took his hand again, lacing her fingers through his, giving him the needed support. He nodded at her briefly before turning his head back to now very interested in what he was going to say Cisco and Barry.

"What is it?" Cisco asked. "Wait! Don't tell me you suddenly don't want to be the Flash again, because dude…"

"No," he denied, "I actually _need_ to be the Flash, because there's so much I need to fix and repent for."

"Ok, dude," Cisco seemed confused. "Now you totally lost me."

"Yes, Wells," Barry agreed. "What is it?"

Harrison sighed, exchanging another look with Caitlin and she just nodded, encouraging him, taking his arm and pressing herself into his side.

"There is something you don't know," he started then when clearing his throat. "Something I was afraid to tell you. It's the same thing that kept me from… well, getting closer to Snow," he glanced at her briefly. "I'm surprised that once she found out the truth she still wanted to be with me, but… well, it's her choice, I suppose and I'm not going to deny her that."

"Ok, now you got me _reallyyy_ confused," Cisco decided. "What is it?"

Harrison took a deep breath before finally confessing, "I knew there was a risk of the particle accelerator exploding before I launched it. I knew it and yet, I stood by my decision. I thought nothing would happen, that the percentage of the risk was too small, but…" his voice trailed off and his eyes bored into the floor.

There was sudden silence as the two guys were processing that information and Caitlin simply stood there, being the support for Harry and hoping with all of her heart that her friends wouldn't think she'd already chosen a side in this before they even asked her to; her fingers tracing random patters over the skin of the man's hand.

Barry was the first to react and it was no surprise, really as he always had a strong moral code.

"You _knew_ and you didn't say anything?" he was shocked, looking at Harry as though he saw him for the very first time. "How could you not say anything?!" He put his hands on his head, running them through his hair, his face wearing a look of pure shock. "All those people! Good people! They were all turned into metahumans! Iris… Iris has spent _months_ wandering around those halls, thinking she was dead! Caitlin!" He then faced his best friend before shifting his eyes back to the culprit. "Do you have _any idea_ _what she's been through_?! She's been… she is… so in love you, you idiot and you just either kept hurting her or pushing her away and _now_ that you're _finally_ willing to tell the truth, she's _still_ by your side! Don't you see what you've done?! I… I can't!" His hands dropped to his sides as he directed himself to the exit.

"Barry…" Caitlin tried stopping him, but in the same time she refused to let go of Harry.

"Not now!" he just threw her way. "I need some time!"

Once she lifted her eyes to see Harrison's face, his own were closed, lines appearing on his forehead, his expression so terribly haunted.

"Nice work," Cisco finally spoke, his voice strangely calm, but it was so disappointed that it might've been even worse than Barry's reaction. "I thought we were something more than just co-workers," he said when moving from behind the console. "I thought we were _friends. Family_ , even. I just… Ah, I can't believe you didn't trust me enough to tell me the truth." After that, he simply left in the direction of his own lab.

"That went well," Harrison finally commented in a heavy voice.

All that Caitlin could do now was to turn to him and put her arms around him, feeling him giving into her embrace with a heavy sigh. He didn't deserve this, he thought when burying his face in her hair and breathing her wonderful scent in. He didn't deserve her or his friends – if he could still call them friends. Maybe all he deserved was his entire life of work ruined.

"Give them time," Snow said quietly straight into his ear just then.


	7. Chapter 7

Caitlin actually dreaded to face the team the next morning and she was right in her assumptions because barely had she walked into the cortex, she saw Cisco throwing a newspaper across his desk.

"And I actually thought once I'm gonna see that, I'll be thrilled," he murmured under his breath, folding his arms over his chest as he leaned back in his chair.

"Hey, guys," Cait chose that moment to say her greetings and she walked on wobbly feet to her own desk when hugging a copy of the same paper to her chest. She couldn't be happier about Iris's article that was released with the speed of light and titled _In a Flash_. The city officially had its own superhero, which only meant that the team would be busy. Quite frankly, as much as she was happy for Harry finally taking upon the suit and his new calling, she wasn't sure the timing was right, because what if she would be left all alone in the cortex whereas he was out there, helping people? She wouldn't be enough of a support for him, she wouldn't be able to coordinate everything by herself, would she? Then she froze, realizing she made the decision without even thinking about it because the fact that she would stay by the side of the man she was in love with no matter what and despite everything and anything that might still happen, seemed to be a given. So much for holding on to her _friends_ … Then again, they were still there, weren't they?

"Um… how are you today?" she raised her head from the article to look at them. Cisco was still sitting in his chair whereas Barry was slowly pacing along the room.

"How do you think we are?" he just asked. "Something like that…" He shook his head. "Caitlin, we can't just get over it in one night."

She nodded, biting on her lip. "I understand. I really do… it's just…"

They were interrupted by Harrison Wells walking straight into cortex and then coming to a stop, actually surprised to actually see them all there. Though the fact about which Caitlin was surprised was that he was wearing a suit and whereas usually seeing him all dressed up would evoke very positive feelings in her, now she just felt this inexplicable dread inside that she couldn't quite place. Only then she realized it was because of the last time she'd seen him like this – it was just before she found him unconscious and barely alive.

"What's with the get up?" Apparently, Cisco couldn't stop himself from asking that much despite him still being angry with his boss.

Before answering, Harrison made a beeline for Caitlin, placing his hand on her shoulder and leaning forward to kiss her good morning. He was aiming at her cheek, but she turned her head in the last moment and met his lips, just needing to feel him by her side alive and well, her hand going up to his arm and resting there briefly.

"What's wrong?" he immediately followed with as he pulled away and she just shook her head.

"Nothing. It's stupid. I'm just glad you're here," she told him, but he still frowned, so she added with a sigh. "It's the suit, Harry. It doesn't actually bring good memories."

"Oh," he seemed to guess as he straightened up. "Sorry. Let's change that, then."

"I'm sorry… what is going on here?" Barry wanted to know, his voice, yet, bleak and rid of any emotions.

"I have called for a press conference," Harrison informed, standing by Caitlin's desk, his hands in the pockets of his suit.

"What for?" Cisco frowned, not following, but Cait already felt her throat going dry as she seemed to know exactly what the older man was going to say.

"I'm going to tell the whole world the truth. This is the only way if we ever want to keep working together," Wells simply informed. "This is also the only way for me to clear my conscience, though…" he followed with a sigh as he looked away for the moment, "honestly, I don't think I can ever fully repent for what I've done."

"What if they arrest you?!" Caitlin suddenly exclaimed when raising to her feet, her hands braced against the counter of her desk. "Harrison, I can't lose you. Not like this, not again and as hell not when we're finally together!"

He risked a glance in her direction before assuring her, "Why would they? I made a scientific mistake and people got hurt, but I didn't point a gun and kill anyone. I didn't put any innocent person into a lab and experimented on them so they would become metahumans."

"No, you just pointed the gun in the right direction and made us pull the trigger," Barry said bitterly and Cait just couldn't believe she heard that right.

"What? Isn't that the truth?" he just asked when she looked at him.

She swallowed, but in the end refrained herself from saying anything.

"They won't arrest him," Cisco surprisingly backed Harry up when raising from his seat. "This isn't worth building a case against him. He's not a criminal."

There was surprised silence as they realized Cisco actually stood by Harry's side.

"What?" he asked then. "I agree you should tell them the truth, but the truth is that despite the risk you knew about when bringing the accelerator online, you believed it wouldn't happen, am I right? The risk itself must've been small."

"It was," Harrison admitted in a strangely quiet voice.

"Exactly. Besides, the moment it happened, you marched straight into danger to shut it down and you did. Well, technically Ronnie did, but…"

There was sudden silence as they remembered of _that_ particular problem.

"We're gonna have to talk about this, guys," Barry said. "About Ronnie. We can't let him harm innocent people."

"I agree," Harry nodded, "and we will all continue our search for him. In the meantime…" He turned to Caitlin. "Will you stand by my side?" he asked.

Her lips parted and eyes opened wider as she heard that and spotted him reaching a hand to her, suddenly overcame with a powerful feeling of déjà vu. Well, except that the last time they hadn't held hands, that was.

In the end, she just nodded, swallowing over a gulp forming in her throat and she took the offered hand, immediately feeling comfort washing over her at the touch.

"Oh, wait…" Harry then hesitated when she was just about ready to jump into fire for him or, in this case, march straight to the main atrium to stand by his side while he would be telling the world the whole truth. "On second thoughts… your career is already damaged enough, so maybe… maybe I should do it alone."

"Not a chance," she told him in confidence, reaching her second hand to his and for a moment keeping it in her grasp. "We're doing this together because we're in this together. We always have been," she turned to Barry and Cisco, but they just stood there, stupefied and then watched her following Harry out of the cortex.

"Maybe we should…" Cisco eventually suggested.

"Yeah. But just because Iris's probably already there," Barry pointed out. "I don't want her to freak out."

* * *

Caitlin was proud of her man.

She couldn't have put it into any other words. She truly was proud.

She was proud because he didn't run, didn't bury himself in work, didn't hide his face from the world. Instead, he walked straight into the atrium bravely, though his hand still had a strong hold on hers; and faced the cameras just like that fateful day.

What he said was short, simple and the point.

"As you all know, my name is Harrison Wells and the last three months I have spent in a coma, fighting for my life as I got injured the memorable day in S.T.A.R. Labs when the particle accelerator going online caused a major explosion. Me and one of my colleagues, got hurt trying to shut it down, but fortunately we managed. Now, I wish I could tell you all that was the end of the story and everything is all right now, but we all know that's not true. We all know that what happened that day affected an entire city and the people living in it, especially those in the close proximity to this building." He stopped for a moment, looking at his audience, Snow's calming touch reassuring over his hand that she never let go of, just standing there with him, arm in arm. He couldn't even begin to express how much that meant to him. "What I am here today to tell you, won't be easy, but it needs to be said. After everything that happened I owe you the whole truth and the truth is that I knew beforehand that there might be a small chance of the accelerator exploding," he finally confessed and came to another stop as gasps of shock filled the room. "The risk was miniscule and I was convinced it was nothing," he then continued, "yet, I was wrong. For that I am sincerely sorry and I hope I could be of some assistance to you in the future. From this point onward, I just want to help this city."

The moment he finished, the atrium was suddenly filled with people shouting various questions at him, everyone wanted to know something. From what Caitlin managed to gather people were mostly ostracizing Harrison or either asking whether he would rebuild the Labs, how he would even find funding and what kind of people would want to work for him; some questions were also directed at her and what she was doing there by the side of a pariah.

"There will be no questions answered today," Harry said to her surprise, but she was grateful for it, truly. She didn't know whether she would be able to handle him doing that.

He gave her hand a little squeeze and then he moved towards the exit and she followed, on her way actually catching Iris's expression as the girl was standing in the crowd, frozen. Caitlin thought maybe she was desperately fighting off the urge to just disappear, to turn invisible and couldn't in front of so many people. She was pleased to find out Barry was already on his way to her.

* * *

"Well, that went well," Cisco deemed the moment he with Harry and Caitlin were back in the cortex; Barry probably out with Iris, trying to calm the woman down. It must've been a major shock to her to find out the man who was the Flash she'd written about in her article was also the pariah who'd ruined so many lives. Like two sides of a coin, a hero and a... _human,_ Caitlin actually decided because just because he'd made a bad call, having all the best intentions and actually believing the risk itself was just too small to be taken seriously – that didn't make him a bad person!

"I won't blame you all if you leave. After all, I just buried myself completely, that conference being the proverbial last nail to my coffin," Harry turned to Cisco. "Be sure to pass my gratitude to Barry for working alongside me."

"Wait, what?" Caitlin asked, just staring at him in shock. "We're not leaving."

"Snow, your feelings for me are clouding your judgment. Are you absolutely sure this is where you want to work?" he just asked her, spreading his arms open. "There is no future for you here."

"You know," she started just then, not even getting angry at him because she understood him. He cared too much for the three remaining people in his team to just let them ruin their lives like he'd done with his own. "Maybe I used to think that career was the most important, but it won't warm you up during a cold night, so… _you_ are my future, Harrison and you're here." His lips parted when he heard that and she just now realized what she implied by evoking that night metaphor. They hadn't exactly slept together just yet, but it seemed inevitable. "Harrison, I found _family_ in these walls. I found you and Cisco… and… oh, I really hope Barry doesn't leave, but if it's what he wants to do, then we gotta let him go. We all know he stayed behind for me."

"But I am this city's newest pariah," Harry still argued, clearly fighting the emotions that threatened to show on his face.

"Then I'm right here with you. I'm not going anywhere. This is my decision. As the Flash… you can actually do so much good here, Harry. And I want to be here to share that with you. I want to help you as much as possible."

"You and me both," Cisco surprisingly backed her up when walking over to the couple.

Harrison shot him a shocked look.

"Ramon, I…"

"Don't say anything, man. I'm always with you." After that Cisco actually pulled the older man into a hug and when he let him go, he said, "I'm gonna go find Barry and see where he's standing."

"Maybe I should do that," Caitlin offered and Cisco nodded after a brief moment of hesitation.

"You're right. He's like your brother. Go, talk some sense into that guy."

"No," she denied. "I won't do that. I'll be fine with whatever decision he makes."

Both Harrison and Cisco agreed in the end and after Caitlin placed a brief kiss on Harry's mouth, she left, texting Barry to meet her at Jitters.

* * *

"Hi," said Cait when she finally located Barry and sat by his table. "How's Iris?"

"Hanging on there," Barry answered with a sigh and then he met his friend's eyes. "Cait, listen…"

"Barry, please don't ask me to choose," she suddenly said and he blinked in surprise.

"What are you talking about?"

She took a deep breath and just said it because she'd been keeping this in for way too long and couldn't do it anymore. "Don't ask me to choose," she repeated, "between you and the team, I mean. Barry, we're… we're family, right? And Harrison is the man I love. I cannot possibly be put in this position."

"Cait… I… I would never make you choose," Barry assured her to her surprise.

"But you are disappointed in me, aren't you?" she followed with.

He hesitated for a moment when looking aside and then he ran a hand though his hair.

"No, Cait, I could never be," he answered honestly when meeting her eyes and then he reached his hand over the table to take her own. "You could never disappoint me. I out of all the people understand how it is to love someone and finally be able to get closer to them."

"So I take it it's going well with Iris?" Caitlin hinted just then, sending his way a small hopeful smile.

"I don't know," he admitted when taking his hand away and then holding onto his coffee cup. "I guess so? I mean, talking to her about her powers and being there for her once she found out about the accelerator… it's bonding, right? It's good?"

Caitlin stifled the urge to laugh because Barry was just so cute and awkward. She didn't want to hurt his feelings, so she went with, "Of course it is. Build a solid ground there. It's nice. But don't wait too long," she then advised him. "You don't want to get stuck in the friend zone."

"Like you and Harry?" Barry hinted with a glint in his eye.

"No. We were never there. There have always been romantic feelings between us. He was just… being an idiot, I guess," Caitlin eventually settled for and then she giggled. "Oh, God, and I'm actually with that idiot now! Should've punished him first, right? For stringing me along?"

"For what it's worth, I don't think he was doing that," Barry disagreed. "I actually like him more for keeping his distance at first. I know it was confusing for you and it hurt you, but… just because he didn't grab what was there right away made me respect him some more."

"But you won't forgive him, will you?" she asked out of the sudden. "Now that he's finally come clean about everything, will you leave the Labs?"

"Honestly…" Barry sighed, thinking about it, "I don't know, Cait. It always wanted to work there and… there really isn't any other place I want to work in. I just… I need some more time, I guess."

"That you can definitely get," she assured him with a smile. "Take all the time you need and once you're ready, I'll be fine with whatever decision you'll make."

"Don't cross me out just yet, Cait," he told her. "I might just come around. After all, what would I do without you?" He winked at her and she smiled to him brightly, for the first time actually believing everything would be all right and they would all get past this. That in the end they would all be fine, working together, being a family.

* * *

Caitlin couldn't seem to find Harrison anywhere once she came back to the Labs and eventually, she located him in the pipeline, just sitting there, playing with his fingers while thinking.

As she approached him, she noticed he'd changed, no longer wearing a business suit for favor of his usual black attire. She liked that.

"You'll be pleased to know that Barry's coming around. He needs more time than Cisco, but he'll be fine. He's still onboard," she informed when taking a seat next to Harry.

"Good to know," he just said and then followed with a sigh.

"Hey, it's gonna be ok," Caitlin assured him when putting her arm around him and pressing herself into his side. "We're gonna get through this. We're strong when together."

He nodded with a chuckle that, yet, didn't reach his eyes when he looked at her.

"I don't know what I did to deserve you, Caitlin," he confessed then.

"This isn't about deserving. Though, you're an amazing man, Harrison, you just can't see it. But I do," she told him when turning to him and cupping his face, looking into those lovely blue eyes. "I see _everything_ in you."

He finally broke a smile.

"I'm just…" he started again when she let his face go. "I'm worried I'm not going to be able to restore S.T.A.R. Labs to its former glory."

"And this is something you want to do?" she made sure.

"I guess. Yeah…" he admitted. "It's just… It seems like such a waste, you know? So much space, so much potential for innovation and not enough people to make it happen."

"If this is what you really want, then we can manage, but in baby steps," she told him. "Why not? Though I think that first we need to figure all that Flash stuff out and once we establish a new routine, we can think outside the box. We can actually rebuild this place."

He nodded, but then he just said, "Provided someone would actually be willing to come and work for me again."

"Hey, don't lose your faith. I'm sure people will soon forget about everything. Besides, you go out there as the Flash a few more times and that's gonna be all they're gonna be talking about."

He smiled again when looking at her.

"Thank you for being here. Without you…" he came to a stop, "well, this would all be so much more difficult without you by my side."

"Always," she assured him when slipping her arms into his and resting her head on his shoulder. "You may be worried that the Labs aren't filled with scientific stars, Harry," she then followed with, "but in the night vast sky, _you_ are the only star I see."

He stilled on hearing that and then he slowly moved towards her, looking her in the eye, his own conveying too many emotions there. She gasped when she took all of that in and then his hands were on her face and he was kissing her and they couldn't seem to stop once they started. Lips and tongues dancing, arms embracing.

Eventually, he pulled away, breathing heavily as he rested his forehead against her own.

When his suddenly darkened from desire eyes opened to meet hers, he confessed, "I love you, Caitlin Snow."

Her heart sung as she heard that and her face was illuminated with a bright smile, her eyes watering.

"I love you, too, Harrison Wells," she responded, bringing her hand to his face and stroking the skin there gently. Next, she pulled him close for another kiss, just needing more of him, _always_ needing more of him.

"Are you willing to risk it and actually go on that date with me?" he then asked. "Because you know, technically people can look at me wrong now."

"I don't care how they look at you," she assured him. "All I care is how _I_ look at you. Let me just run to my place to put something nice on and we're going!" She kissed him one more time, just wishing the night was here already because she was sure she wouldn't let him go after dinner, not when she would finally get to make a proper use of his body.

* * *

As both Caitlin and Harrison were happily preparing themselves for the date and what was coming, they were oblivious to Ronnie standing in one of the Central City's streets, watching the news through a shop window and more specifically – watching Harrison Wells confessing to being guilty of the explosion. The same explosion that took Ronnie's life. Of they said it had.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, so… initially I intended for a smutty chapter, but got sidetracked again… Next one. Definitely!


	8. Chapter 8

It'd been a while since Caitlin had gone shopping, not to mention pretty dress shopping. It wasn't like she'd gone on any dates since the accelerator explosion and even before that, since she'd been too infatuated with her boss to even think about meeting other men. Besides, work always got in the way in the end, so now she could only pray that the date wouldn't get interrupted as she was perusing her closet in search of something sexy or at least nice that she could wear. Once her eyes came across a little pale blue dress she knew she hit the jackpot since she was positive she'd never worn this for any of S.T.A.R. Labs' formal occasions, therefore Harrison couldn't have seen it. It wasn't as though he minded what she wore, but she wanted to look pretty for him just because it was their official first date. In fact, she needed everything to just go perfect and she could only hope the team wouldn't interrupt when calling about some crisis. The real question right now was whether Caitlin would even fit into the dress. She hadn't been wearing it for years and her body, though thin, had become fuller as she finished college and started working. Then again, those last few months she'd lost some weight when being constantly worried about Harry's life. She could only hope it would all even itself out in the end.

"Bingo!" she called out happily when checking her reflection in the mirror. The dress was perfect, a pair of dark blue heels and matching envelope bag fitting just right. Cait wondered whether she should do something about her hair, but in the end she let it be, allowing the curls to fall down her back. She was ready just in time, the doorbell ringing, indicating Harrison impeccable punctuality.

She smiled broadly as she ran to the door and flung it open, not able to wait till he saw him. Her mouth parted open, mirroring his own reaction as she took in his usual head to toe black attire. The difference now, though, was that after a closer examination she reached a conclusion that he was actually wearing black pants with a dark grey button down shirt to break a little color – still, she could argue about that – and a black jacket over it all. There was also a small bouquet of blue hortensia in his hands.

"Hi," she said, the smile refusing to fade away from her face.

For a moment he didn't actually say anything to that, just staring and staring, shamelessly running his piercing blue eyes down her body, taking in the tight blue dress she was wearing.

"Um… Harrison?" she eventually asked, feeling rather uncomfortable because she couldn't be sure whether he was simply admiring her or deciding she didn't look all that good. And where the sudden insecurity even came from? She immediately chastised herself. She looked perfect and he must've noticed.

"Oh, sorry," he apologized sincerely, just now realizing that his staring was all too obvious. "It's just… you…" He met her eyes and sent her way a sheepish smile. "I guess I've never seen you in anything remotely causal or… or this _sexy_. You always dress up professionally for work."

"I'm not sure whether to take this as a compliment or not, but I'll run with the first," she teased him, smiling again. "You don't look so bad yourself. Although you could use a little color."

He was just about to roll his eyes at it when she added, "Good thing Cisco and Barry designed your suit. Otherwise you'd be running around all in black."

"I was actually going to talk to them about the yellow…" Harry picked up on that.

"Don't you dare! Besides, they won't change it just to spite you and you know it."

"Well, it's not like I don't deserve it." He sighed and the smile faded away from her face.

She made a step forward and looked up at him. "Harry, what happened is already in the past. Let's look into the future, ok? Is this for me?" she then asked and he blinked a few times at the sudden change of topic. Then he realized she meant the flowers he was still holding on to and actually forgot about.

"Oh, of course. I see I made the perfect choice. They go with the dress."

"Thank you. I love it!" Snow showed him her enthusiasm when she took the bouquet and then briefly disappeared back in her apartment, throwing his way that she was going to put it to water.

Harrison just stood there outside the door, his hands in his pockets as he truly wasn't sure what he should do now, whether he should maybe walk inside or… It had been a while for him since he'd been on any kind of a date or… he didn't even remember when was the last time and out of the sudden he was beyond nervous.

"Are you ok?" Caitlin asked when she appeared again, grabbing her coat on the way with her bag and then she closed the door behind her. "You look all jittery."

"Honestly, Snow…" he started and after a brief moment of hesitation, he finally confessed, "it's been a while since… I mean…"

"I haven't been on a date since forever, too," she admitted just then and his eyes flickered back to hers. "In fact, the last one was when I was still at college. Great, hah? Maybe I shouldn't even be telling you that."

"Honestly, you're no better than I am. Or… on second thoughts… at least _you_ remember your last serious date."

"Oh," she picked up on that, sending his way a coquettish smile as she slip her arm though his and they started off down the corridor, "so it's _serious_ , then."

"I remember already confessing my love for you, so I can't imagine it wouldn't be," he responded.

"I'm just messing with you, you know?"

"Oh, I do. And I'm just playing along, dr. Snow."

"I think we'll be just fine, dr. Wells. Lead the way."

* * *

Snow didn't know why, but she was anxious the whole drive to the restaurant as she kept on waiting for the other shoe to drop, for the team to call them in, to tell them there was a crisis, that there was a new metahuman in town causing some rampage or maybe Ronnie making an appearance.

Harrison picked up on that and he reached his hand to take hers and squeezing gently.

"It's going to be fine. The city can handle one night without the Flash."

"Are you sure about it?" she still asked, squeezing his hand right back.

"It's been fine so far, right? My powers are a rather new development, after all."

"True," she admitted with a nod, by now playing with his fingers. "We've had enough of bad luck, so this night should go well for a change."

"How well exactly?" he suddenly asked, his voice growing hoarse and she knew well what he was implying. In fact, she leaned towards him just then, careful not to obscure his view of the street ahead and then she placed a soft kiss on the side of his lips.

" _Very well_ ," she answered him and he actually groaned at that.

"Are you sure you want to go to dinner?" he eventually asked and she laughed.

"Of course I am," she told him on purpose, just to see him squirm. "I'm starving, so better drive fast. I need my stamina."

"Oh, I see," he nodded. "So dinner you shall get."

They heard the police sirens and Snow looked out the window in worry, but Harry calmed her down, saying that he didn't have to go out there every time something like this happened. It was the police's job to react first, not his.

When she settled back into her seat, relieved there was no call from the team, she marveled at how privileged normal couples were to be able to go to dinner without having to worry about any possible crisis. Then again, this was the life she'd chosen and she wouldn't make any other choice even if she could. This was where she belonged, by the side of Harrison Wells for better and worse and no matter if he was a hero or a scientist. To her he was and would always be the same man. The man she'd fallen in love with.

* * *

In overall, the date went great, Caitlin thought as she and Harrison were making an exit, heading to his car and then… she blushed at very thought of it, actually having been aching inside all the way through dinner, not able to rid of images of his body or maybe as much of it as she'd seen so far. She couldn't wait to explore it further, to feel his lips on her and his hands everywhere. She wanted to go all the way and she wanted it _now_. They'd been waiting for their happy ending for way too long to just take it slow. Still, she enjoyed the conversation they were having during their meal and the wine they drunk. And if she was scared that people might be looking at him the wrong way or even try and approach him after seeing that press conference, she could rest her mind. Ok, technically, the usher that led them to their table did send them a strange look so Caitlin thought that he must've definitely seen the news, but it was a very exclusive restaurant and no one dared insult dr. Wells for fear of losing their job. The waiter that was tending to them was almost invisible, so good he was at his job, so added to that the lack of any calls for help, the dinner was a tremendous success.

"So…?" Caitlin finally asked, all jittery and nervous out of the sudden as they walked the path to the street and waited for Harrison's car to be brought over by the valet.

"So," Harry responded, smiling to her knowingly.

"You're not making it easy on me, are you?"

"Well, you were the one who insisted on having dinner," he pointed out.

"And I was right! It was delicious! And that wine!"

"I hope it didn't get to your head."

"No. But you most certainly did," she told him and he was just opening his mouth, a smoldering look in his eyes when the valet brought the car, so all he could do was to give the man a tip and open the door for Caitlin to hop in before taking the passenger seat and driving away.

"Would you maybe like to come over?" Harry eventually broke the pregnant silence, seeing that soon they would approach the intersection and he would be forced to make a turn. It was either taking her to his place or driving back to hers.

"Yes," she answered, her voice not wavering even once. She was overly flushed and felt herself growing wet in anticipation. And he barely even did anything! Oh, boy, she thought just then, heat striking her even more. It had been so long since she'd fallen for this man, since she'd started to desire him that she couldn't even contain herself. One thing she knew for sure, it would take much more than one love making session to satisfy her current cravings.

The rest of the way they spent in silence and just as Harrison opened the front door of his house to let her in, he asked, "Would you maybe want something to dri…?" He didn't even manage to finish his sentence because she was suddenly kissing him. She didn't even know how it happened. One moment she was walking inside and the next her lips searched his and never intended to let them go again.

His hands immediately cupped her face as he kicked the door close and turned them around, her back meeting the wall as he deepened the kiss, perusing her mouth until they were both breathless, his hands resting on her ass now, squeezing the buttocks there and then going up to cup her breasts through that crazily tight dress.

He sucked her lower lip inside his mouth before finally releasing it and resting his forehead against her own, his hot breath coming out in pants as he said, "I'm sorry. That was too much too fast."

"Don't ever be sorry," she told him before burying her hands in his hair and bringing him closer once again, never wanting to stop kissing those beautiful and skilful lips of his. Her hands ran down his chest, pulling the shirt out of his pants and disappearing underneath it, running up his chest, enjoying the taunt muscles there before they went back down to rest at his belt.

Harry groaned deeply in his throat and he pushed his body against her, allowing her to feel how hard and ready he already was for her, causing her to release a whimper in response as she thrust her body forward, wanting to feel more of him. His hands were back to her breasts and then went to pull the zipper down and he finally slid the blue fabric off of her body, leaving her only in matching blue underwear. He kissed her again, tracing a path from her lips to her neck to suck on the pulse there for a moment before kissing the moulds of her breasts and gently biting on her nipple through the fabric of her bra that actually caused her to scream in pleasure and press his head harder into her body. He didn't linger, though, going lower and lower until he was crouching in front of her, his lips now tracing a path up her bare leg until they reached her panties. He pulled them down immediately, throwing the lacy fabric away and then he could finally taste her, finding her already so wet for him that he felt his erection nagging at him rather painfully. He chose to ignore it, dipping his tongue inside her and inhaling her scent, using his lips to prod and lick. Her hands were now resting on his shoulders, squeezing rather hard, her whole body trying to hold still as it wasn't entirely able to. He decided to surprise her with something and he vibrated his tongue and mouth against her, immediately feeling her trash, coming hard and screaming his name.

By the time he raised back to his feat, she was leaning against the wall, breathless, trying to regain her composure. His strong hand soon held her up and then rid of the bra she was still wearing.

"Ok?" he asked when finally able to take in her whole beauty, finding her body so tempting, so tantalizing.

"Hell, yeah. Or wait… no," she then corrected with a frown and he was suddenly taken aback. What could she…? "This has to go _now_ ," she decided and opened his shirt, buttons scattering the floor before she took it off of him.

"Hey! I could've easily torn your underwear apart and I haven't!" he protested, looking after his now destroyed shirt.

"Yeah, but _you_ can certainly afford another shirt. My salary is quite smaller than yours," she responded when reaching for him and putting her arms around his neck, bringing him closer again, kissing him deeply. He soon must've forgotten about the shirt because he didn't bring it up again. Well, truth be told, he forgot about everything, including his own name, because her hands were now working on his belt and then the button and the zipper and she finally slid the pants down his legs along with the boxers. He was finally free from the tight confine and able to feel more comfortable. Until she grasped him, that was. That was actually torturous.

"Wait…" he stopped her just then, putting his hands over her own that were closed around his length, a fine sheen of sweat breaking on his forehead as he met her eyes. "It's too much," he told her. "In fact…" She squealed when she suddenly felt herself being swooped away and in the next second she was lying in his bed with him hovering above her, a self-satisfying smirk on his face.

"Are you proud of yourself now, mister?" she asked. "So you got powers. It's not like we couldn't have sex in the hall."

"We could," he admitted, "and at some point we probably will, but I want our first time together to be special."

Snow stilled, not able to believe she actually heard those kind of words coming from this man.

"Damn it! Don't repeat any of this to Ramon," Harry then told her. "I don't want the team to think I'm suddenly sentimental."

"Are you?" she asked him teasingly.

"No. In fact…" He rested now between her legs, his hard abdomen slowly moving along her soaked core, causing her to squirm with desire.

"Harry…" she gasped. "I think it's enough of… of foreplay…"

"Told you. I'm not vanilla," he said when closing her mouth with a dirty kiss.

She cupped his face, kissing him back and then running her hands down his back to cup his buttocks, earning herself a groan when she actually dared go further than that and grabbed his balls from behind.

"Dirty move, dr. Snow," he informed her, barely keeping his voice straight, sweat breaking all over his body as he couldn't stand this torturous anticipation anymore.

"I never liked vanilla anyway," she said when meeting his darkened eyes and then she immediately whimpered again, her mouth hanging open as she felt him finally sliding inside her in a one powerful, yet slow stroke. "Oh, God, Harry! Yes!" she screamed, holding onto his arms with both of her own as he finally started making love to her, moving out almost all the way before hitting right back inside, burying himself there to the hilt.

God, that man was so good at what he was doing, Caitlin decided, not even able to think anymore, just feel. And this was too much. In fact, there had been too much tension between them for the last few months. She truly felt like she was going to explode so powerfully that she would die. She knew that it was ridiculous from a scientific point of view, but it was how she felt. This man would truly be her undoing.

And he was. He so was since as he felt her being so, so close to reaching her peak, he groaned deeply in his throat, holding on to the rest of control he had and he actually managed to use his powers, vibrating his entire body and just then feeling and _hearing_ her come so powerfully he just had to let go as well, releasing himself inside of her.

When he recovered, his face was buried in her hair, his body still on hers, him still inside of her, both of them breathing heavily and so, so hot that it started to feel feverish. Yet, he didn't move. He didn't even think he could. Holding on for so long and using his powers on top of it all depleted him completely. He felt stinging on his back and he vaguely remembered Snow digging her nails into the skin there, scratching widely. It was all right, actually since he could already feel it heal thanks to his powers.

Eventually, he managed to slip out of her and fall into the pillows right next to her, still panting, his heart still raging like crazy.

"That was…" she was the one to speak first. "That was… I have no words… I… My God!... Harry, I'm… I'm pretty sure you killed me!"

"Really? Because I can still hear you talk," he joked and then laughed when she smacked him.

"It's official," she then followed with, "you have ruined me for other men! There is no way I'm ever leaving you _now_ that you showed me _this_."

"What other men?!" he immediately picked up on that and sat up in bed despite his exhaustion, looking at her, stunned. "Are you kidding me?!"

"Actually, yes," she admitted, very proud of herself.

"So you're just sticking with me for the sex, then," he followed with, pursing his lips. "Because I can actually become a human vibrator? Is that it?"

"You know it's not true," she put his mind to rest. "It's just a bonus. In fact, you don't have to do it if you don't want to. I'll be fine with being with you any other way. I love _you_ and when you love someone, sex becomes more like giving yourself to the person you love, like… giving the pleasure to _them_ , thinking about them above yourself."

"And the best part is that it goes both ways," Harry said, smiling to her.

"Oh, yes. It is."

"I love you, too," he told her before leaning forward and kissing her again.

"You're kidding me!" she called out a few minutes later when she actually felt him hard and ready again, his erection poking into her thigh.

"I've been wanting you for a very long time," he just said in response, fitting in between her legs. "I have to warn you, though," he said when entering her once more, both of them groaning at the sensation and their already sensitive nerve ends, "no vibrating this time. I'm too tired."

"I told you I'd love it either way… oh, yeah…" she voiced her appreciation as he started moving, this time slower, making sweet love to her, his eyes never leaving hers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh… um… yeah… that happened. Enjoy. I wanted to give you an incredibly steamy and hot chapter just because it may be my last before vacations. I have two other stories to update and two videos to make Wednesday before I'm off. I will still be online and in touch in case you want to chat, provided the hotel Wi-Fi works fine, but I don't see why it wouldn't (someone's got to see the Flash finale, right?!), but the next update will be in more than a week. Sorry.


	9. Chapter 9

Once Caitlin finally woke up the next morning she didn't really care what time it was. Did it matter anyway? She thought when moaning quietly in pleasure on feeling a warm pair of arms enveloping her and an equally hot body pressed against her own. Once having heard the sound she made, Harry tightened his hold on her, bringing her even closer and then pressing his face into the back of her neck to kiss her there. She was so perfectly happy in that moment that she wanted to prolong it as long as possible, having no care in the world for anything but this – waking up in the arms of the man she loved, feeling so blissful, so light. It was all she truly needed, she thought, moving against him slowly, feeling skin grazing against skin until…

"You gotta be kidding me!" she finally spoke, teasing him when she clearly felt his hard length pressing against her side. " _Again_?"

"You had no complains the night before," he reminded her, shifting his head slightly and biting gently on her earlobe as his hand slid along her stomach and then lower to cup her.

Truly, after the amount of sex they'd already had she should be rendered useless, but somehow she felt the need for him again, deep and visceral. She couldn't even think clearly, so desperate she was to feel him move inside her. They were truly making up for the lost time. And they were so in love with each other. In fact, she doubted there would ever come a day when she would have enough of this infuriating and in the same time amazing man.

Her legs spread open all on their own as he began stroking her gently before moving his hand up to pay some attention to her breasts. His need for her was way too obvious as she could feel him involuntarily pushing his pelvis against her, needing some friction.

That was it, she eventually decided, all wet and restless and craving his body again, so she turned and straddled him as she pushed him to his back, his length sliding along her core, causing her to whimper. After the night they'd had she was supersensitive and now she was simply dying to have him.

So she didn't waste any time. She grasped him and guided inside when lowering her body onto him, watching his face contorted in pleasure as he felt her channel closing around him, taking him in all the way to the hilt. She braced herself on his chest then and began riding him slowly, enjoying every inch of him moving in her, grazing against her inner walls, driving her crazy.

His hands went up to cup and play with her breasts for a moment before he reached higher, taking her face and pulling towards his own, needing to kiss her. As she did so, he suddenly sat up, surprising her by changing the angle of the penetration and it earned him another uncontrolled whimper. He put his arms around her, moving rhythmically with her, hitting just the right spot and when he saw that she was so, so close to coming, he slightly vibrated his entire body, pushing her over the edge as she froze and then frantically started riding her orgasm off.

When they fell into the bed again, they were both breathless.

"We just got up," Harry eventually said, panting, "but I feel like going back to sleep."

"We didn't exactly do much of sleeping," Caitlin reminded him when glancing at him from aside, admiring his powerful and such beautiful body, now shining with perspiration in the sunlight coming from the window. "What time is it anyway?"

"Late."

"Should we maybe get up, take a shower and head to work?" she eventually suggested and in that moment Harry's cell phone rang.

"Snow, what on earth did you just do?" he asked her in complaint. "You jinxed it!"

"I can't believe you out of all people believe in jinxing!"

"I don't. But in my mind I already had us in the shower."

"Oh, my, you really _are_ insatiable. Is this because of your powers or it's just you?"

"I think it's _you_ ," he corrected her, finally forcing himself to get up and search for his phone, knowing well that Caitlin watched every move he made, admiring his body. Well, it kind of worked well for his self-esteem, so he didn't protest. And then he actually came to a stop, pressing his hand to his head.

"Are you all right?" she immediately asked in concern when sitting up on the bed.

"A little light-headed, but I'll be ok," he assured her.

"Well, you are a speedster now, so you need to consume more calories. We did burn a lot and you did use your powers with me…"

"Ok, ok, that's enough, doctor. I think I got it," he stopped her right there, his expression, yet, amused. "It's West."

"What?" Caitlin frowned, not following and then she noticed him pointing to his phone.

"Iris West called. I take it she might want to expose me." There was a hint of worry in his voice. "She knows who or maybe rather _what_ I am now and she knows that the particle accelerator explosion was my fault."

"No," Caitlin denied right away, getting up as well while grabbing the sheet from the bed and putting it around herself. Somehow she didn't feel right when standing in front of him naked while having a normal conversation. She also didn't want him distracted. "Iris wouldn't do that. Barry talked to her. Besides, she actually _likes_ her powers."

"Well, that doesn't change the fact that she's been through three months worth of hell because of me."

"Call her back. Let's see what she really wants. I'll head for the shower while you do that."

He sent her a disappointed look.

"None of that now, Harry! Focus!" Snow berated him when pointing her finger at him.

"Spoilsport," he murmured under his breath.

"We got time!" she threw his way before disappearing in his master bathroom.

* * *

Just as Caitlin predicted, Iris did not want to expose Harrison. Yet, she did use their acquaintance to ask him for an exclusive interview about the particle accelerator. In the end, both Snow and Wells decided it was a win, win since he had to give a private interview at some point and Iris being on the receiving end of it was their best chance. She didn't want to expose him as she actually promised to keep his identity as the Flash a secret. What she wanted was just his version of what happened. In the end, Caitlin even thought that it might do him some good and maybe restore his reputation at least a little. Especially if he shared his dream of rebuilding the Labs one day.

"So…?" Barry prompted when Harrison and Iris disappeared in the man's office and Caitlin just took her usual seat in the cortex.

"So, what?" she asked, looking at her friend questioningly. She did not comment on the fact that he showed up for work that day, just happy to have him back, happy that he and Harry seemed to be on the right track again.

"Oh, come on!"

"Barry, seriously…"

"He means to ask how it was to spend the night with Harry," Cisco provided from his desk. "Not that I really want to know the details! God, no!" he quickly followed with. "But we do want to know _something_ and I think Barry here is just too polite to ask."

Caitlin didn't know whether to laugh or be angry at the boys. In the end, she just raised her eyebrows high. "Excuse me?" She blushed at the very memory of Harry making love to her.

"Was it _that_ good?! God, girl!" Cisco raised his voice. "I can see the crimson on your face from over here!"

"Ok," Barry stopped him when raising his hand, "that's enough. We got all we need to know now. I'm just happy you're happy, Cait," he then turned back to his best friend.

In that moment, an idea came to her mind.

Since Cisco was mean enough to actually prompt such private things… "It was fantastic," she said, "and you know what's special about Harry? He can vibrate any part of his body thanks to his powers."

There it was! Both the boys opened their eyes widely and then winced, unwanted images entering their minds and Caitlin simply burst out laughing while clapping her hands.

"Girl!" Cisco called out immediately. "That's so not cool! That's… that's _too much_! Didn't I mention before that I _didn't_ want too much information?!"

Cait only shrugged, looking all innocent. "But those weren't specific _details_."

"Oh, God, no! No! No!" Cisco kept on saying when shaking his head and now even Barry started to laugh.

Their moment was broken by an alarm sounding and they were immediately on alert, Cisco rushing to the main console to check what that was all about.

"Bank robbery in progress," he provided the info. "I think we gotta interrupt the interview…"

"No need," they heard Harry's voice as he just sped into the cortex. He must've heard the alarm as well. "Where do you need me?" he queried when joining his friend at the console. "I need the practice."

He changed into his suit in no time, but before heading off to the bank, he did stop in front of Caitlin and placed a brief, yet fierce kiss on her lips.

"I love you," he told her and was gone.

Cisco whistled.

"Will you just focus on helping him?!" Caitlin got angry, placing her hands on her hips when she faced her friend. Though inside she was all jittery and happy. She just couldn't help it.

Cisco grinned at her before finally shifting his eyes to the screen and then Barry, who was already there, asked, "What's that? Another speed signature?"

"That's…" Cisco swallowed hard, the smile disappearing from his face in an instant. "I'm pretty sure that's Ronnie. Crap!" He grabbed the comms, but it was already too late. The moment Harry reached the person who was robbing the bank, Ronnie got him from behind. "Watch out!" It was a few seconds too late. "Damn it, he didn't see that coming!"

"What's happening?!" they heard panicked Iris who just ran to the cortex all the way from Harry's office. And it couldn't have been easy on heels. "What's wrong?"

"Ronnie, our evil speedster, just grabbed Harry from behind and…"

"Where is he taking him?" Catlin asked in panic, watching the small dot on the map indicating that Harry was moving.

"Beats me. Maybe he just wants to rattle… Crap!" Cisco cursed again when another alarm sounded, this time one indicating that Harry's vitals were all over the place, his body undergoing a physical trauma.

"Harry! Harrison, can you hear me?!" Caitlin grabbed the comms and called him since that was the only thing that came to her mind at the moment. The only thing she could do. "Forget fighting! Just focus on running away, ok?! Run, Harry, _run_! Run back to me!"

"Snow!" he only managed to scream when the dot started moving even faster, away from the other one indicating his enemy.

And then, there was a whoosh of air as Harry ran into the cortex, falling down and crashing into the wall, the impact knocking him out.

* * *

When he came to, a moan was immediately released from his lips as it hurt everywhere.

He could vaguely hear voices around him, but he couldn't make them out, the trauma to his head being too much for the moment.

"What did Ronnie do to him?" Cisco was just asking Caitlin, his hands on his head, indicating his hopelessness.

"My guess is that he ran him into a building wall. Multiple times," Snow answered, her voice shaky as she truly didn't know what injury to take care of first. "He grabbed him from behind and supersped with him. Poor Harry had no chance of orienting himself about what was happening as he crashed into a wall again and again."

Finally, Harrison managed to focus on the one voice that mattered, the one that belonged to _her_.

"Snow," he said not without difficulty and she was immediately there, hovering above him, her hands put on each side of his face and even this seemingly innocent touch caused him pain.

"Just stay still, ok? Oh, God… you have at least five broken bones and the bruising… and swelling… I don't know what to take care of first…" she started panicking and he could feel he was losing her. "I don't want to have to break it all over again so it would set properly… I…"

"Caitlin!" Barry called her name as he walked straight to her, placing his hands on her shoulders from behind. "Caitlin, it's all right. He's alive. He's going to survive, ok?" he started telling her in a soothing voice whereas Cisco and Iris just stood there, watching the scene helplessly. "Just take a deep breath for me, ok? Harrison is going to be just _fine_."

Caitlin listened, actually managing to relax a little under her best friend's touch. She closed her eyes for a second, taking a deep ragged breath and then another one and another, steadying herself, focusing on the feel of Harry's face beneath her hands and the warm touch of Barry on her shoulders.

And then something strange happened.

She wanted nothing more than to make Harrison feel better, to take all of his pain away and somehow she felt pain as well.

She cried out when something seemed to snap inside of her.

"Caitlin?" Barry asked in a worried voice, letting go of her to circle her and look at her face. "Cait? What's wrong?"

"It's… I…" She staggered and he caught her, preventing her from falling. "Make it stop… It hurts!"

"What hurts?" Barry asked, now actually terrified. "Caitlin?!"

Only in that moment it felt like she was hit straight in the guts, the air escaping her lungs and she passed out.

* * *

It was strange that just a few moments ago she was the one watching Harrison regaining his consciousness on her lab bed and now she was opening her eyes to the world, registering they somehow switched places and she was lying down with him, Barry, Cisco and Iris hovering all above her.

She blinked a few times and then frowned, not understanding how she even got here in the first place.

"Guys?" she asked and then she focused only on Harry.

Something was wrong, she knew that much, but it took her a few more seconds to register what exactly.

"How…?" she gasped, sitting up immediately and feeling both his and Barry's hands on her, trying to keep her still. "How are you healed already?" she asked Harrison, ignoring the concern the men were just showing her.

"Well, that would be a good question, wouldn't be?" Harry just asked, letting go of her and folding his arms over his chest, looking at her expectantly. He seemed to be angry with her, but she couldn't tell why that was exactly.

"I don't understand," she admitted, shifting her eyes to Barry and then to Cisco. "What happened?"

"So you had no idea?" Harry asked in surprise.

"About what?"

"That you have powers, too, Caitlin."

"Wait… _what_?!" she asked, both her eyes and mouth opening widely. "No! That's ridiculous! I don't!" Denial being her first natural response.

"How else can you explain you taking my pain along with all of my injuries away before passing out and waking up completely fine?" Harrison followed with.

She was truly rendered speechless and then she brought her hands up and looked at them as though she could find the answer there.

"I… I _healed_ you?" she gasped, looking into his concerned blues.

He nodded.

"I don't ever want you to scare me like this again, Caitlin, do you understand? _Ever_ ," he emphasized.

"But… But… You know I'd do it all over again! I love you and you were hurting!"

"And you just had to take that pain away so you could be the one hurting?!" he argued. "Caitlin, watching you suffer and then fall down… that was… it was just _awful_."

"And how do you think I felt when you came back all bruised and bloody and broken?!" she reacted when raising her voice to match his.

"Guys! Guys!" Barry had to cut in. "Seriously! You two are the worst! We shouldn't be focusing on who wants to suffer for whom right now! Shouldn't we get to the bottom of those powers instead? How on earth did Cait even develop them? Why now?" he asked the perfect question.

Harrison's mouth parted open in a gasp before he said, "I assume she was close to the explosion. You came back _for me_ , Caitlin. You must've been affected by the accelerator as well."

"But why now?" She was still shocked.

"Ronnie and Harry were the closest when it happened," Cisco guessed. "We can only assume Iris was somewhere in the close vicinity as well, maybe on the side of the accelerator and then… you came back for Harrison and… and then, there was _you_ , Barry."

"Wait… what?" Barry seemed taken aback. "I don't have any powers!"

"Not yet," Cisco said with a huge smile forming on his face.

"This isn't funny. And this is all my fault! _Again!_ " Harrison said in anger just then and he turned around, hiding his face in his hands. "Yet once again I hurt those I love!"

"Hey!" Caitlin got out of bed and reached him, facing him. She took his hands away from his face and forced him to look at her. "This isn't your fault! _I_ made the choice to come back for you! And _I_ was the one who would _always_ save you no matter what! No matter the pain it would cause me!"

"And it did, didn't it?" he just asked, a haunted look in his eyes. "So what that you can apparently heal people if you have to suffer through the pain while doing so?"

"I guess nothing comes without a price," she said in a calm voice and then shrugged. "Harry, the important part is that those powers… they're _good_. And they helped _you_. You know it goes both ways. You know it's killing me that you have to put yourself in danger every day and now, now I finally have the chance to help you! To keep you all right!"

"For what cost?!"

"Whatever the cost is, I don't care."

He pressed his lips tightly together and looked aside, taking into all that new information, trying to deal with it the best way possible.

"What's gonna happen to Allen if he's next?" he then asked, a helpless note in his voice. "I… I never wanted any of this to happen!"

"I know," it was Barry who said that, surprising them all. "But it happened. We all make mistakes, but they don't define us, Harrison. What does is what we do with them. And you are definitely raising up to the call."

There was silence and finally, Harry nodded, not able to say another word, so touched and rattled he was. Caitlin pressed herself into him, desperate to make him feel better and he understood in that moment that love, indeed, went both ways. He couldn't hold it against her that she was willing to risk herself to save him because he would do the same thing for her without hesitation.

"Wait a sec…" Cisco then said, thinking hard when raising his finger, "you and Ronnie," he turned to Harry, "you were both rushing to the accelerator, right?"

"Your point being?"

"And Cait… Cait only wanted to save you and Iris… she was reporting… Can't you see? You and Ronnie get superspeed, Caitlin can heal people and Iris turns invisible so she could be a better reporter!"

There was sudden silence as they realized the importance of that discovery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, surprised much? : )


	10. Chapter 10

Once the news about Caitlin's powers sunk in, both Cisco and Barry decided to call it a night, the latter actually having a date with Iris that he really did not want to cancel. Snow, on the other hand, still felt the need to run some additional tests on Harrison, so they stayed behind, needing to be sure everything was all right.

"I see nothing out of the ordinary," she finally informed when looking over his tests results on the screen of her computer whereas he was impatiently sitting on the lab bed. "Well, your speed aside, that is," she corrected when turning around in her swiveling chair to face him.

"Great, so now we can finally take care of you," he said when standing up and grabbing a fresh syringe from her worktable.

"Um… What are you doing?"

"Testing your blood. Come on, Snow, you have powers now so we have to know everything there is to know about them, don't we?" he asked when preparing the needle.

"Um… I can heal people. I don't think we need to test it."

"Snow, come on, are you actually afraid?" He raised his eyebrow at that silly excuse. It was as though it would be enough for him to say _I just superspeed_ to avoid testing. He knew there was no way in hell she would buy it.

"Nooo…" she hesitated just then, eying the needle warily.

"Seriously, what is it?" he prompted in confusion. "If it were me, you'd already be doing all the tests and you know it. That's why you have to understand why this is so important for me now. I need to know that everything is all right with you, too. You did take all of my injuries on yourself, after all."

Caitlin only sighed, rubbing on her forehead. "Harry, the truth is…" And just then he understood.

"I know," he assured her immediately when putting the syringe away, walking over to her and placing his hands on her shoulders. "I know that you don't want me to tell you that you shouldn't use your powers when there's so many people in this world that need saving, but the truth is that you couldn't possibly save them all even if you wanted to. We need to know how this works, Caitlin. _I_ need to know whether these abilities of yours can take a strain on your health. What if every time you heal someone, it eats away at you in ways we can't even imagine?"

She looked aside when biting on her lip before she eventually nodded in agreement.

"You're just not gonna let me sleep tonight, are you?" she asked with a sigh.

He ran his hands up and down her arms, his touch soothing. "Nope. And trust me, I'd rather we spent this sleepless night doing far more pleasurable things than blood tests," he teased her and she finally smiled at him, leaning forward and snuggling up to his chest.

"So, shall we?" he eventually prompted when letting go of her.

"And here I thought I'd somehow manage to convince you that maybe we _should_ be doing far more pleasurable things."

"None of that, dr. Snow! At least not until we're done testing you!"

* * *

It was already past midnight when Caitlin and Harry settled themselves in front of her computer, checking the results. The latter didn't really understand much of it while not having any medical training, but Snow patiently explained it all.

"That's interesting," she eventually murmured under her breath, her attention now completely focused on the diagrams and various numbers on the screen.

"What is? Talk to me!" Harry got impatient, clearly nervous about whatever conclusion she might've just reached.

"Um… Sorry," she apologized quickly, realizing he was taking this far worse than she did, so she hurried up with another explanation, "It seems that I take the injury on myself because my body needs to experience it all first in order for my cells to generate the necessary energy to cure it. It's all completely new to medical science, obviously, but as I just now exposed a sample of my blood to a virus, it first attacked the cells and then the dark matter that is there reacted, neutralizing it."

"So… basically you have to _be_ hurt first so your cells would fight everything off? That's just wrong. Unacceptable!"

"Harry… this is beautiful!" she argued.

"Oh, really? What if someone fell from a building and broke every bone in their body? Would you like to feel it all then in order to heal them?! And what if someone was dying in a fire or…"

"Ok. Stop!" she raised her voice, horrified by the images he was conveying in her mind and the pain that they would ensue.

"I'm sorry," his voice softened as he realized what he'd done, his hand going up to ruffle his hair. "It's just… I know that you're a doctor and you'd love to heal the whole world, but in this case… Caitlin, this just isn't possible. You can't wander off to every hospital and take upon yourself all the diseases known to mankind. What kind of a life would that be?"

"You know me all too well," she sighed when leaning back in her chair. "But I never said anything about _that_."

"I know you were thinking it anyway. You're the best person I know, but this… this isn't the way."

"Isn't it selfish, though? Having the ability to help quite literally within my grasp but do nothing about it?"

"Wait… unless…" Harry gasped just then. "Unless you simply begin new research study. What if you research your own blood? Maybe there's a safe way to create some kind of a vaccine or a cure?"

Caitlin's eyes lit up as she smiled to him brightly.

"That's a brilliant idea, dr. Wells!"

"I will do anything in my power to restore this place to what it once was, Snow; and once I do that, you'll be one of the first to receive a grant for this. I'd love to say that you should just go somewhere else so you could begin your study for real sooner, but I'm afraid once other people find out about your powers…"

"I know," she agreed, saddening, "I have to keep them a secret, otherwise I risk being exploited."

"I will never let that happen," he assured her when taking her hand into his and meeting her eyes.

She sent him a sad smile. "I know, Harry, I know. And just so _you_ know, I'd never go to work anywhere else even if that helped me figure all of this out sooner."

The expression she saw on his face once he heard that was too much for the both of them. He was never touchy-feely, so emotions this powerful were a completely new thing to him and she understood he didn't know quite yet how to handle them. In the end, she simply cupped his face and pressed her lips against his, done with work for the day – or maybe rather night.

"You know," she then spoke against his mouth as the kiss slowly came to a stop, "there's still plenty of the night left, so we can try those far more pleasurable things out."

"Can we now, dr. Snow?" he hummed. "What a great idea! In fact, we have a perfectly fine bed right here." She squealed when he suddenly lifted her up into his arms and carried there.

"It's for examination!" she protested.

"Correct. And we're gonna do some serious examination, indeed!" he informed seriously and she burst out laughing which quickly died out in her throat as he began kissing her.

"Harry, seriously, this bed was barely made for one…" she complained as she almost fell from it.

"No problem. Let me rectify the situation," he responded quickly and she suddenly found herself straddling him whereas he was lying on his back. Added to that, they were both completely naked. "Better?" he asked.

"Oh, yes. Your powers always come quite handy," she voiced her appreciation when leaning forward on his chest and kissing him as she began rocking her body into his, working him up into an arousal, though he was already half-way there…

* * *

Caitlin didn't really have the time to get back to her place to grab a fresh change of clothes the next morning and she was still angry with Harry that he'd run to his house and was back in no time, already showered and dressed. Couldn't he at least think of her as well and make a stop at her apartment? Then again, it wasn't like she would hold it against him for long, just settling for a shower in the Labs and for a company sweatshirt. They had more important things on their minds than this. He did make fun of her, though, when she chastised him for it.

"All right! Snow, it's no problem! I'll run there right now!"

"Oh, don't bother! I'm fine now!" she responded angrily, pointing her newest acquisition with a S.T.A.R. Labs logo on it.

"Well, you can definitely pull off anything, so…" he started just then and they were interrupted by Cisco arriving. Barry was already there, all smiley as his date with Iris had gone really well.

"Guys, I have a brilliant idea!" Cisco called out, but he didn't even manage to share it as an alarm went off. "Oh, crap," he cursed when rushing to the console and checking the problem. "Ronnie. Go, figure!" He sighed theatrically. "He made another appearance in the city."

"Great. I need to deal with him once and for all," Harry said when speeding into his suit. "Any tips?"

"Actually, that's the fantastic idea I have," Cisco followed with. "Judging by the energy you create around yourself while running, I think you are capable of also creating a lightning bolt and actually throwing it at your opponent. If you succeed in doing this, you might be able to knock Ronnie out for long enough to bring him here and throw into the pipeline."

"Pipeline?" Caitlin picked up on that with a frown.

"Yeah, you see, I figured we could use it as an impromptu prison before we can maybe make a deal with the police and… Hey, where did he go?" Cisco looked around in confusion, not seeing Harry anywhere.

"Oh, I don't know, pal, maybe he got bored with you talking all the time," Barry joked when patting his friend on the back.

"Did he at least hear the part where I…?" Cisco wanted to know and they all heard Harry's voice coming from the comms.

"Yeah, Ramon. Loud and clear. Can we maybe proceed to actually stopping this guy before he makes some serious damage?"

"Um... too late, I guess," Cisco said, swallowing hard while looking at the monitors. "Some civilians already got hurt."

On hearing that, Caitlin really wanted to help, but she knew there was no way she could get there fast enough with Harry being busy. Besides, she couldn't risk being seen while taking upon herself all the injuries of the people in the street in a bright day.

"I'm gonna have to run them all to the hospital first," they heard Harry's voice and saw on the screen the moving dot that was him, the GPS hidden in his suit. "Ok, all done. What now?"

"I'm thinking," Cisco simply said when running calculations in his head.

"I'm sorry, Ramon, you're _thinking_? Haven't you already figured this out?!"

"Um… give me a moment! I need to run some numbers, man! Stall him!"

"Stall…" Harry was already parroting, but then he just shook his head. _Useless_ , he thought when facing Ronnie. The guy looked terrible, his clothes all torn and dirty, his hair in a desperate need of a hairdresser.

"You just had to go and take everything from me, didn't you?" Raymond asked him, approaching him slowly, temporarily keeping his powers at bay.

"Now, now," Wells just sighed, settling for listening to Ramon through the comms and playing along, "what on earth are you talking about? I didn't take anything from you. All I have, I worked hard to achieve!"

"Oh, I'm not talking about work and your precious S.T.A.R. Labs! In fact, how's that going, by the way, hah? The explosion was meant to take everything from you and yet, you still ended up with more than I could ever have!"

"Wait… What did you just say?" Harrison frowned on hearing that. "You… You didn't try to stop the explosion," he gasped in sudden realization. "You _made_ it happen! There might've been danger, but I managed to account for that and you…" He brought a hand to his head, but then he quickly discovered his hair was hidden underneath the mask so he couldn't possibly run it through it in a gesture that he always made when nervous. " _You_ caused the particle accelerator explosion! _Why_?"

Ronnie only laughed whereas there was sudden silence back in the cortex, Cisco even stopped running calculations, so shocked he was himself.

"He did… _what_?" Cait gasped.

"To ruin _you_ ," Ronnie answered Harrison. "To take _everything_ away from you just as you did from me!"

"I never took anything from you!"

"Oh, really? What about Caitlin? You already had everything, doctor! You had your Labs, the career of your dreams and yet, you just had to have her, too!"

Harry shook his head, actually laughing at that insinuation, "You know what? Here's the biggest irony, Raymond, because I actually tried to _push_ her in your direction! I never believed I was the right man for her, but now… you just proved to me how wrong I was about that. I _am_ the right man for her, age difference aside, I love her and she loves me and that's it. That's all we need. So you haven't ruined me, you actually pushed me in the right direction, in the direction I was always meant to go. I finally started to be honest with myself and the team. I stopped trying to prevent myself from being happy. I might've been hiding behind the age gap before, but that was never the real reason. I was simply afraid I wouldn't be good enough, Snow," he spoke directly into his comms now, making sure she heard him. And she did. With tears in her eyes. "I am finally embracing who I am and that is a hero. All thanks to you. So in the end you failed _again_ ," he looked Raymond straight in the eye when saying that.

"You think so, hah?" Ronnie just asked. "So here's one more thing you need to know. I traveled a lot before coming to work for you. I discovered some ancient legends about this thing called the speedforce. I came back to Central City, I got that job, engineering the accelerator and I made sure it would explode despite every precaution you took. It's all thanks to me that you have those powers. I figured out how to open the speedforce, how to imbue myself with it. You were just an accident."

"Really? That doesn't change the fact that you're a villain whereas I am a hero," Harrison said calmly, though inside he was kind of intrigued.

"Matter of semantics. You see, I quite enjoyed being remembered as a fallen hero who shut down the accelerator. I didn't even try to tell people the truth. And now, once I get rid of you, I may become that hero again. Playing it is kind of fun."

Cisco just now finished relaying all the information he'd come up with to Harry through the comms, so the older man just said, "You're delusional," and then disappeared, doing everything Ramon had told him to in order to charge himself with enough energy to create the lightning bolt and eventually throw it at Ronnie.

Raymond must've not seen it coming and then it was too late. The bolt already hit him straight in the chest and… At first it threw him up into the air and backwards, but then… the man screamed, fisting his hands and…

"Guys, I think it didn't work quite the way we thought it would," Harry relayed to the team, watching as his opponent quite literally froze in the air, the charge being absorbed by his body.

He then was back on the ground and he ripped his jacket open, showing Wells some device he had stripped to his chest.

"Thank you. It was just what I needed to complete my plan."

Next thing Harry knew, Raymond was gone.

"What just happened?" he heard Cisco's voice in the comms. "I don't get it… It's like he _wanted_ us to do that. What…?"

Wells was just about to come back to the Labs when everything suddenly froze around him.

"Flash," he heard a very familiar voice coming from behind him and he turned, shocked on seeing Snow, but in the same time it wasn't her.

This woman, though sharing the same looks, didn't seem like the one he loved. For starters, her face seemed to glow slightly, rid of any make up and seeming younger than he ever remembered Snow being.

"I am not Caitlin Snow. That guess is correct," the apparition confirmed his suspicions, a strange portal shimmering behind her. "I am the speedforce and I come to you in this familiar form so we could talk."


	11. Chapter 11

Harrison was speechless once he heard the _speedforce's_ words. This was exactly what Ronnie had talked about, he realized, the source of their power. He looked around briefly, seeing everything standing perfectly still as though time itself had stopped.

"We're moving so fast that everything else seems to be frozen," 'Caitlin' spoke as though reading his mind.

"Why all of this?" he finally asked, shifting his eyes back to her. She did look like a slightly younger version of the woman he loved, yes, but at that the similarities ended. She seemed stiff, definitely not human. And she wasn't. Not really. This appearance was only for him to be able to talk her or possibly trust her, but if she asked him his opinion, he'd tell her it didn't exactly work that way.

"By letting Ronald Raymond charge himself like this, you imbued him with more power. He is able to run back in time now, dr. Wells. He's doing that as we speak."

"Come again?" Harrison thought he heard it wrong. Time travel? Really? Only then he ran the calculations in his head and nearly sucked in his breath, too busy recently with trying to be a hero and dealing with Snow's newly discovered abilities to have time to understand his own more. Yes, provided that he had enough speed and protection from the friction that his powers were already providing for him, it was possible for him to time travel. The realization nearly leveled him down because the implications were obvious. He could run back in time and make an accidental mistake. He could even potentially erase himself from existence, the movie _Back to the Future_ Ramon had made him watch once, a testament to that.

"I take it I don't have to ask what Raymond is going to do," Harry sighed just then, the worst possible scenario seeming to also be the most plausible one in this situation.

"He's going to try and kill you, dr. Wells."

Harrison needed to pull himself back together before he spoke again since he was afraid his voice might come out shaky. It was just his luck, apparently, that when he seemed to finally have everything – well, ruined Labs excluded, but it wasn't like _that_ was what mattered the most – a tragedy was bound to happen and take it all away from him. _Again_.

"How can I stop him?" he asked. "This has to be the reason to your sudden visit, right? You want me to stop him."

Speedforce in the person of Snow nodded.

"You have been given extraordinary powers, dr. Wells and not by accident. We have chosen you. It was Raymond that was the by-product, not you. And as you must know, with great powers comes great responsibility and he is abusing his. What is unfortunate here is that _you_ yourself have given him more, _you_ have made him able to travel back in time."

"I was trying to stop him!" Harry got angry, shifting from one foot to the other in his impatience. "You can't hold me accountable for that! I was trying to do the right thing!" And it blew straight into his face _as always,_ the ever-present bitter taste of defeat in his mouth.

"We know, but it doesn't change the fact that what is done is done. The time cannot be changed, the implications being all too grand. The speedforce will help you, dr. Wells, but before we do that, there is something you need to see so you will never _ever_ try something like this yourself. You have to remember that you're not only playing with your life and the lives of those closest to you, you in fact play with the fate of the whole world and every single person in it."

"Why are you telling me this?" He frowned.

"Because life deals us with all different kinds of cards, dr. Wells. Something may or may not happen to you or those you love, but eventually everyone dies. And whatever happens, you absolutely cannot go back and undo it. _Look_."

The world around Harry spun, yet he seemed to be standing still, grounded in place, only able to see but not act.

He saw Ronnie arriving at his destination in the Labs and speeding into his own office without hesitation, sticking a vibrating hand right through the past Harrison's chest. It was all over in a flash, the bitter irony not lost on Harry. For a moment he even panicked, thinking this was happening for real, that he, indeed, was just killed and the time altered, but then he remembered what the speedforce told him, so he forced himself to calm down. Yet, it wasn't easy.

Because this one death spurred a whole string of accidents and that must've been exactly what the speedforce was trying to warn him about.

One death. One small change. One life out of billions ended too soon.

It all prompted an avalanche impossible to stop.

The first image he saw wasn't all that bad as Ronnie was just in the Jitters, rid of his powers since his actions made it impossible for the particle accelerator to ever be built and therefore it never exploded. The door opened and Caitlin walked in, causing something in Harry's chest to twist.

He was bracing himself for the blow, sure she was there to meet Raymond and that the man got everything he wanted. He caused the particle accelerator explosion so he could get powers in order to get back in time and kill Wells so he could get the girl.

The blood started to boil in Harrison and he wanted nothing more than to move, grab Snow and speed off with her, but that was impossible. He told himself one more time that it wasn't real. That this wasn't really happening. It was just a projection of a possible outcome showed to him.

Still, it didn't seem to make the whole situation any better.

Though he did feel relieved once Raymond made his way to the table by which Cait sat and was actually shot down.

"Is this seat taken?" he asked, showing her the brightest of his smiles, his intentions clear from the start.

To Harry's surprise, she sent him an apologetic smile when saying, "Sorry, but I'm waiting for my boyfriend."

Once he heard that, Wells felt a pang of jealousy. It was a strange occurrence, indeed, that first he was afraid Raymond was the date, then happy that Snow turned him down and now he was displeased again because she was already taken. He wondered who the lucky guy might be since he himself was obviously dead in this timeline and then… The worst thought hit him because what if this life could've actually been _better_ for her? Maybe she did deserve better than him. In fact, she deserved all that was best. He only wanted her to be happy and yet, every single day she assured him that she was, that she wanted this life by his side because she loved him.

His jaw dropped open as he saw a familiar person entering the Jitters.

When Barry Allen spotted Snow, his face illuminated in the brightest of his smiles and it was clear to Harry that he was head over heels for her. Only wait… in his timeline Allen was in love with Iris and he'd never let anyone believe there was more to his relationship with Caitlin, though it was always special. Like _brother_ and _sister_ , Wells reminded himself, feeling sick as he watched the younger man going over to Caitlin and placing a kiss on her lips before sitting down at the chair Ronnie had asked about earlier.

Wells's head started to spin as he raked his mind over the issue. Could Allen actually have _feelings_ for Snow that went beyond those of friends or siblings? He felt sick. He wanted to leave, to go anywhere but here, but he was unable to.

Then his attention was attracted by the news that played on the TV. Iris West, the youngest reporter to receive a Pulitzer, was killed on her way back to Central City after four years of travelling over the world.

Harrison guessed this was his answer.

And then he noticed Ronnie sitting in the corner, watching the couple talking with a murderous expression on his face.

Harry's emotions kept on changing like in a kaleidoscope sine now he was angry that Raymond would try and hurt Allen for being with Snow.

Everything started becoming very blurry just then and soon there was nothing around him but a whirlwind of colors and the speedforce in the person of Caitlin.

"He's gonna hurt Allen, isn't he?" he asked her. "Caitlin is happy and he's…"

"Are you sure?"

"What? Of course I am! Did you see the way Raymond looked at them?!"

"I meant the happy part," speedforce corrected. "How can you be sure she is?"

"Wha…? How can she not… I mean… She certainly _seemed_ happy."

"And you got that from a brief glimpse? You should know that appearances can deceiving. The answer is no, dr. Wells, she is most certainly _not_ happy. The truth is that there is no real passion between her and Mr. Allen. They're best friends that decided to try and become something more. It might be working for now when it's still new, but it won't last. Their relationship is rather tepid, lacking passion that you always read about in books. Caitlin Snow stopped believing in that kind of love a long time ago and she doesn't even realize that was her grand mistake. Because love like this exists. Just not between _them_."

"Are you seriously trying to tell me that it's between me and her?"

"You should know it by now, dr. Wells, that love simply is where it is. Age, nationalities, skin color… it all disappears when it comes to real love. It just so happened that you two found it together."

That information left Harry speechless and quite frankly, he had no idea what to even think of that fact. It kind of felt liberating, like a huge relief, a burden taken off his shoulders since despite his powerful affections for Snow, he knew the age difference between them was always going to be on his mind, troubling him, not to mention that he'd also ruined her career.

Now he knew he should stop this thinking altogether and just accept what they both felt for what it was – _real love_ that knew no obstacles. It was educational, actually. In the end, he knew he would be glad to have had the speedforce relay all of that to him even if now he still wasn't quite over witnessing that kiss Caitlin shared with Barry. That one he wished to erase from his memories since it still made him sick with jealously.

"Where's Cisco?" he found himself asking then, remembering his best friend and immediately worrying he might be dead just like Iris was.

The speedforce Caitlin only smiled before she disappeared and everything spun around him once again, the colors finally sharpening enough to present shapes and he eventually discovered he was in one of the Labs' rooms.

Cisco was there, standing before a strange metal construction with another whirlwind inside before… Harrison frowned on seeing a figure emerge from there and then gasped when he recognized… himself. But that couldn't be right. He was dead, wasn't he? And he was also pretty sure that what he just saw was definitely _not_ bringing someone back from the dead. That just wasn't possible. Period.

It all became clear when the man got to his feet, raising his hands up into the air, introducing himself as dr. Harrison Wells from another earth.

So the theory of parallel universes all existing at once was actually correct? Harry wondered, his mind spinning with all the new information, yet, once again.

Everything dissolved into nothing then and when his view sharpened…

His mouth parted open as he spotted what appeared to be an embracing couple. What more, it was himself and Caitlin.

It took Harry a minute to arrive at a conclusion that she and the Wells that appeared in front of Cisco had an affair.

"What the…?"

"Oh, yes, they wouldn't be able to help it even if they tried. This is the not-so-happy ending to Caitlin and Barry's relationship," the speedforce provided, appearing right by Harry's side. "Fate will always find a way, dr. Wells. This," she pointed the kissing couple, "will rip Caitlin's relationship with Barry apart and not only in the romantic sense. She will lose the best friend and support she'd always had. She will hurt everyone in her life because of _this_."

"So Raymond didn't kill Allen?" Harry just asked, forcing himself to tear his eyes away from the couple. This sight wasn't that bad for him. In fact, if he needed another proof that he and Caitlin were meant to be… There was truly not a version of his life without her in it and vice versa, was there? He could as well give up now, stop overthinking things, stop working himself up over the seemingly non-existent issues and just make his way back home to her.

"He thought about it, but he was afraid he'd get caught as it wouldn't be as easy as erasing _you_ from existence when leaving no evidence behind," the answer came. "He's stalking her every move, though and she's completely unaware when carrying a secret about her affair. Raymond hopes for her relationship to end since it's clear to him it lacks real passion, but once he sees this…"

Harry felt sick again, nausea hitting him twice as strong.

So this would be the tragic end to an equally tragic love story. Always in each other's orbits, always given another chance from fate to be together, but always losing it in the end because of one Ronald Raymond who couldn't get over his obsessive feelings for Caitlin.

The life that Harry had so far built was just as much in danger as the one showed to him by the speedforce. He needed to stop Raymond and he needed to do it as soon as possible.

"How can I stop him?" he voiced his thoughts aloud.

"Actually, this is my job," the speedforce informed and he shot her a look, not understanding anything anymore. "I will stop him from going back in time, but it won't come without a cost. This will take a lot of my power and I will need something in return, dr. Wells."

"Name it," Harrison encouraged, swallowing hard, bracing himself for what was to come. He was beyond afraid it would be something he wouldn't be able to give or something that would drive a wedge between him and Caitlin once and for all.

"Stopping Ronnie will take a lot of power which in result will cause a rift. The speedforce energy will start bleeding into the world, destroying it slowly and killing everyone on its way. There is, however, a way to prevent this and it's by trapping a speedster inside to seal the hole."

Harry's mouth went dry when he started thinking of the implications of what she just said, but then he heard, "Luckily for us, Raymond is a speedster, so if you manage to catch him after we prevent him from going back in time, you will need to throw him into the speedforce and it will close, trapping him inside, feeding off his energy."

"All right. All right. I can do this," Harrison said when nodding. "I _will_."

"Just remember that you don't have much time. The rift will open soon and you need to make sure Raymond is in there before it starts destroying the city. Otherwise…"

"I know. I won't fail."

"That's all I need to hear. Now go. Do your job."

* * *

Suddenly, he was back on the streets and people started moving again, the time no longer flowing slow for him. He didn't waste it, picking up running and arriving in the cortex, immediately throwing a direction, "Ramon! Trace Raymond's speed signature and do it _fast_!"

"Wait... Wait a minute there, buddy!" Cisco raised a hand, pointing at the older man. "What the hell was _that_? I mean… I mean… dude was supposed to stop and instead… What happened?"

"Cisco _now_! There's _no time_!" Harrison yelled and in that moment a thunder sounded outside, giving him the worst of feelings. All because it seemed to be happening _too fast_.

"Harry, are you ok?" Caitlin was right there by his side, her hands already on his suit and trying to get to the zipper in order to run her hands over his flesh in search for any potential wounds.

"I'm fine," he assured her, stopping her by taking her hands into his and looking her in the eye. He might be out of time, but for her he _always_ had to find it. "Ramon, _please_ ," he threw the younger man's way once more, noticing that his fingers stopped moving over the keyboard just briefly before picking up the pace again. Cisco must've been surprised by his boss actually _asking so nicely_. In the end, he only swallowed hard, seeming to know that whatever was happening, it must've been really _bad_. "Raymond ran back in time," Harry then confessed when shifting his attention back to Caitlin. Like _that_ , Ramon thought, even more scared now. Only then he found the guy.

"Got him! Wait… if he's running back in time…" he started, straightening up his back and scratching his head.

Harry was by the console in no time, checking the dot that was Ronnie.

"Keep me informed over the comms where he's going. He's running away."

"From what?" Caitlin frowned.

"From me. I talked to the speedforce," he relayed quickly when securing the mask over his face. "She told me she could stop Raymond, but I needed to get him ASAP and throw inside to patch up the rift from the power drain."

"What rift? And is it really a _she?_ " Cisco asked, but Harrison was already gone. Yet, when another thunder sounded outside, they all seemed to have gotten at least part of the answer. "Why do I have this feeling that everything's gonna go to hell in a handbasket?"

Caitlin only saddened, already out of her mind with worry and apparently, now it wasn't only Harry that she had to be concerned about.

* * *

Harrison was tired. He so, _so tired_.

It was understandable since he'd never before in his life run this fast and he slowly started coming to a conclusion that he was never going to catch up with Raymond. He simply wasn't going to make it, already feeling his powers depleting because of the effort he was putting in trying to run as fast as his opponent. The other speedster seemed to have more power now and Harry needed to finally admit his defeat, knowing that time was chasing him as well and that every other second spent on running after Ronnie could cost him the life of one of his friends back in Central City where the rift was open and getting out of control.

He had to come back. He knew it. Yet, he couldn't seem to accept that, because it meant… it meant… He suddenly stopped, barely managing to steady himself before he would run into a wall or worse and there was no room for even one more error. He knew what he had to do, yet he didn't want to accept this.

 _Caitlin. Caitlin. Caitlin._ Only her name echoed in his head now and he nearly bent over, opening his mouth and screaming. He was powerless to fight this, powerless to outrun Raymond. He had to take the place in the speedforce. There wasn't any other way out of the situation. Only it still didn't seem like the best solution since it meant leaving his team at the hands of a monster.

Either way he lost. Only one way it was certain that they were all going to die along with numerous people in the world.

Harrison forced himself to make one last effort and ran back home.

By the time he arrived at the front of the Labs, the three of his friends, including the woman he loved more than anything in this life, were standing by the front door, looking up at the sky, powerless to stop the lightning storm that was raging on. And it was getting closer. Soon it would affect the entire city and the people in it and Harry just couldn't let that happen.

"Harry!" she spotted him the second he appeared, bending over and trying not to vomit as he'd drained himself of so much energy by now that he felt like passing out, everything inside of him stirring, screaming _no,_ rejecting the choice he knew had to be made. "Harry," his name came out in a whisper as she gently cupped his face, lifting it up, her fingers sliding over the perspired skin. "Oh my God, you're burning up. Harry, we need…"

"No," he rasped out, barely breathing, desperately holding onto his consciousness as his body wanted nothing more than to finally give up and pass out. His eyes met hers and he drew strength from the never ending love and concern for him that he saw there. He slowly lifted his hands and rested them in the crooks of her arms since she was still holding onto his face, her eyes filling with tears as she seemed to know already what was going to happen. What _had_ to happen.

Her understanding was truly the worst, because he'd rather she hated him. Maybe then it would all be easier.

"I have to pay for my mistakes, Caitlin," he finally confessed. "I just wish you didn't have to pay that price, too."

She shook her head in denial, more tears flowing down her face, her eyes never leaving his blues, her fingers lovingly tracing the lines of his face as though she was trying to burn his image into her memory.

"No, Harrison," surprisingly, it was Barry who spoke, coming closer whereas Cisco just stood there in shock, a look of denial all over his face. "As much as I hate the fact that you didn't tell us the truth about the accelerator before, you can't do this. Besides, now we know that it wasn't _really_ your fault."

"Doesn't matter. I still could've stopped the launch."

"What will this do to Caitlin?" Barry then asked.

"Allen, I _have_ to do this," Harry told him impatiently, "if I don't, we'll all die."

"But… but… what if I don't get you back? Why are you even trying to be the hero so hard now?" Caitlin asked in a feeble voice and he locked his eyes with hers again, never wanting to stop looking at her.

"Because of you, Caitlin. _You_ made me a hero and I couldn't be more grateful that you showed me another way. A _better_ way. I wish we had more time, but…" He sighed, closing his eyes and shaking his head a little before looking at her again. The thunders were getting closer now and were also more frequent, so he knew he had to cut this short.

"I think I liked you more when you weren't trying," she complained, obviously trying to joke, but she failed miserably and Harry felt like crying, appreciating the effort anyway. Because she was so, so strong that it never ceased to amaze him. Even now, when she had every reason to fall apart, she was _strong_ for _him_ , because he _needed it_ and she _knew_ it.

"Listen, I will do _everything_ and _anything_ in my power to come back to you, do you hear me?" he suddenly promised, remembering how the speedforce made him believe once and for all that they were meant to be. That no matter what they did, how much he tried to push her away, they were always meant to end up together. It gave him hope. A feeble one, but it was hope nevertheless. "I promise you. I will never stop looking for a way back to you, but in the same time I need you to live your life, Caitlin. You have to let me go for now." He stumbled just then, his energy running out. He knew he had to use the last remnants of it to run into the speedforce. Otherwise they were all dead. Yet, he didn't seem to be able to move. "Caitlin, you're my lightning rod. I love you. Every road was always going to lead me to _you_." After saying that, seeing what his words did to her, he pressed his lips against hers, kissing her with all of his might and then he was suddenly gone, speeding off and into the speedforce, her arms hanging loosely at her sides as she nearly lost her balance since he wasn't there anymore.

In the end, she didn't really want to fight her body's reactions and she let her knees hit the ground as she screamed, not even registering that the lightning storm ceased, suddenly leaving the sky strangely quiet.

She felt so terribly alone that she couldn't breathe, her chest clenching painfully, causing her heart to be squeezed in an impossible way, the pain becoming too much.

And then there was suddenly a warm pair of arms around her and she gave in to Barry's embrace as he got down to the ground. "I'm here. It's going to be all right, Cait. I'm here. You'll be just fine. I'm sure we will get him back eventually. We _will._ We _have to_ ," he kept on whispering into her ear while she was crying into his shirt.

None of them noticed Iris approaching, watching the scene from a distance as she was making her way to the Labs, knowing that the strange lightning storm had to do something with the known to her speedster.

She used her powers when she was close by and yet, before that, none of the remaining people noticed her, Cisco busy staring into the sky with a very guilty and anguished expression on his face and Barry cuddling Caitlin on the ground, not registering anything around but the woman in his arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All I can do is to apologize for the long wait and thank you for not giving up on me. You know who you are! I hope I did bring on the all-too-familiar anguish, drama and tension of this story. More soon!


	12. Chapter 12

Caitlin had no idea how she suddenly found herself in her apartment. She could've sworn she'd just seen Harry disappear into the speedforce and now she registered sitting on her couch, staring at the offered cup of tea that Barry was just handing to her.

_Oh, right_ , she reminded herself when forcing her body to move, to accept the cup and take a sip despite her not even being able to taste it. It just felt like a hot liquid burning its way down her throat.

"Wow! Careful there, Cait," Barry suddenly warned her. "It _is_ hot. I've just brewed a fresh pot."

She nodded absentmindedly, putting the cup on the table ahead of her and kept on staring at nothing in particular.

"Listen… I know it's hard for you, but I'm here, ok? Besides, you heard him. He _will_ do anything in his power to make his way back to you, ok? And we won't give up either! We'll do everything we can from our side, too. Caitlin, he's not dead. He's just gone for a while."

_Not dead_ , those words finally registered in her brain long enough for her to be able to fight off the drowsiness that overcame her, that numbness. Because feeling nothing seemed to be better than feeling the pain. Yet, Barry was right. She couldn't give up. She had to go on living and believing and she had to do everything in her power to get Harry back. Not to mention that they still hadn't dealt with Ronnie.

And it could've gone so well…

"Why every single time I get closer to him, he leaves?" she suddenly asked, meeting Barry's eyes. "He's finally accepted that he's not the wrong choice for me. We were finally happy and… for how long, Barry? I've just lost him _again_."

"Not for long," her friend assured her when sitting next to her and pulling her into a hug, his hand stroking her hair. "Not for long, ok? He'll be back."

"That's what you said when he fell into a coma. I just… I just don't know for how long I can do this before I break completely," she confessed and tears started to flow from her eyes. "The worst part is that we're not even safe! What if Ronnie…"

"He won't," Barry quickly cut in, still running his hand over her hair. "I won't let him get to you."

"I'm sorry, Barry, but what can you do, really?" she asked him in between her sobs and in that moment he thought that yes, she was right. What could he do?

He stayed with her until she fell asleep from all the exhaustion and crying, his heart breaking at the sight as he watched her with her head rested on the pillow and her legs still on his laps. He continued absent-mindedly running his hand over them, maintaining physical contact, letting her know he was there for her, that her best friend was there. Although it was the first time he actually doubted it was enough. She didn't need him by her side at all times. She needed the man she'd given her heart to and he was gone for now with no means of getting back to her.

Just then, Barry realized he was supposed to meet Iris and had probably already missed their date, not even calling to postpone. _Great,_ he thought, scratching his head and retrieving his phone from his pocket. He'd pretty much stood her up.

"Iris? I'm so sorry for tonight!" he immediately said when she picked up, trying to keep his voice quiet and in the same time show her how sorry he, indeed, was.

"Don't worry about it, Barry. I saw what happened," he heard her say and he frowned in surprise before remembering that the strange lightning storm had been seen all over the city and Iris knew enough about the things happening in S.T.A.R. Labs and speedsters to put two and two together. She wasn't a reporter for nothing. "Is dr. Wells all right?"

"Actually… he's gone," Barry answered, keeping his voice low and glancing at Cait, making sure she was still sleeping. She needed it, after all. "Not _gone_ gone," he added quickly when hearing Iris gasp. "Just… for a while. Until we can bring him back. It was supposed to be Ronnie, but… well, he couldn't get to him in time."

"That's… that's just awful. Are we all ok? Can we even feel safe here now, Barry?"

"I guess. I don't really know. We'll start fresh in the Labs in the morning with Cisco and Cait and we'll see whether we can track the guy."

"How is Caitlin by the way? She must be devastated."

"It's… it's not easy," Barry hesitated again, not knowing how to even begin describing what Caitlin was going through. "This isn't the first time she lost him and now it seems even worse because they're finally together."

"I know. It must be so hard for her! So, when can I see you again? Maybe I should drop by the Labs soon? What do you think?"

There was sudden silence on his side as Barry was thinking hard about it, adding dating Iris to the whole pile of things needing his attention and shooting Cait one more glance. She needed him. He couldn't possibly be going on dates _now_ …

"Iris, listen, I…"

"It's ok," she immediately dismissed what was coming.

"No, it's ok," he argued. "I really, _really_ want to see you, I swear. It's just… I can't leave Caitlin alone now. She's devastated. I need to make sure she doesn't give up, ok? And we do need to hit the Labs early in the morning to start trying to figure out the speedforce, why Harry needed to go in there and where's Ronnie. It's just… it's too much. I'll call you as soon as I can, ok? Wait for me, please?"

Now there was silence on the other side as Iris was digesting what he just nervously relayed. In the end, she said it was, indeed, ok and she hung up. She couldn't help her voice sounding a little disappointed, though.

Next, she did something she wasn't particularly proud of, but she couldn't seem to stop herself, hating herself the moment she invaded Barry's privacy.

She was already close to Caitlin's apartment, following her boyfriend and the woman before when he'd been taking her there and hadn't left since. She was curious and jealous and honestly, she didn't know what to think, fighting herself whether to go in there or not. Eventually, her common sense lost and she found herself using her powers until she appeared in Caitlin's living room, witnessing her sleeping on the couch with her legs over Barry's laps as he was running his hand over her skin.

* * *

Nothing seemed easy in the end and it hadn't even come as a surprise.

They came up with nothing the day after the lightning storm that had taken Harry, both Cisco and Caitlin appearing in the Labs looking like ghosts. Whereas Barry knew that Cait had been suffering from a terrible headache ever since she'd woken up because of all of the crying, he had no way of knowing what was wrong with Cisco. Though he kind of guessed his friend hadn't gone to sleep. Instead he'd come back to the Labs, trying to figure the speedforce out on his own and must've ended up drinking a little too much. Barry guessed his other friend must've been feeling guilty about coming up with the device that eventually led to giving their enemy more power and forced Harrison to take his place in the speedforce.

"Cisco, it wasn't your fault, ok?" he tried one more time a few days later when they were still nowhere with their research, Cisco looking worse and worse, dark circles under his eyes. In fact, both he and Caitlin hadn't broken a smile since that fateful day with the slight different that she seemed to bury herself in work, acting like a machine, not thinking or crying anymore as she was researching the speedforce and monitoring the satellite for any speedster activity.

"It was, Barry," Cisco disagreed, running his hands through his messy hair, "but there's no point talking about it now, is there? We have to get him back. That's all we can do and the only way we can do it is by capturing Ronnie and making sure he takes Harry's place."

"No. There has be a way to get him out!" Barry got angry. "We can't even track Ronnie now, not to mention actually imprison him in the speedforce!"

"Well, then we better get down to searching for him instead of trying to come up with a way to set Harry free! It's our only option and while trying to do both, we're not doing any of those things right!" Cisco raised his voice and then he winced at the headache he had.

"Guys!" it was Caitlin who caused them to finally shut up, standing in the entrance to the cortex, looking at them with tired and teary eyes. "Please, stop. Arguing won't bring him back!"

"Fine!" Cisco yelled, raising his hands up into the air. "If anyone should decide what we should do now is her! Cait?"

Barry met his best friend's eyes, his heart clenching painfully at the sight of her being tortured like this. He knew it'd been just a few days, but she already seem thinner and more tired to him. It was as though they'd gone back in time to the first month following the particle accelerator explosion. He'd hated seeing her like this then and he was desperately doing everything in his power to stop this from going any further. If only he could take Harry's place in the speedforce, he'd do it without hesitation. He'd do anything for her.

"I think we should go with your plan, Cisco," she decided and it didn't come as a surprise to Barry. Trying to figure the speedforce out without Harry there and his connection to it seemed pointless anyway. The only way they could get to him was through Ronnie. Yet, it still seemed an impossible task as the speedster was nowhere to be found. Not to mention they still had to catch him. And they were minus their own superpowered hero.

* * *

While the team was desperately trying to bring Harry back, he seemed to be beyond time itself, drifting in the speedforce, not knowing how long he'd been there, feeling as though he was forever a part of it, yet, there was no anguish, just peace as though everything held him there and nothing was dragging him back home. That was not true, though and he knew it, doing his best to hold onto that thought, spending countless moments trying to desperately remember what he was supposed to come back to and finally… it happened. It was a female voice, a hazel gaze, a hand remembered here or the way she moved there…

_Caitlin Snow_ , the love of his life.

His eyes finally snapped open as he woke himself up from the oblivion. All he saw was a whirlwind of colors around and he himself seemed to be drifting along with them, having no purchase for his feet, yet he wasn't falling. He couldn't tell how much time had passed or whether he'd been actually asleep, depleted of his powers completely after running all over the world, trying to catch up with Ronnie and eventually passing out from exhaustion after his last effort of running into the speedforce.

Snow… Snow… Snow…

Caitlin…

He needed to make his way back to her somehow.

He tried running. He tried standing still. He tried up and down, but to no avail. He was stuck.

The speedforce seemed to have taken pity on him after he screamed in frustration, discovering he wasn't _really_ screaming, the sound just echoing in his head. He _was_ in a different dimension, probably existing beyond time and the universe itself.

"Dr. Wells, there is no way out. You already heard the terms of the deal," he heard a voice that could only belong to the speedforce, yet, he seemed to be hearing it in his head.

"Me being trapped here away from the woman I love and the people I care about wasn't the deal!" He still fought angrily. "They're all in danger and she's all alone _again_!"

"That's not of your concern anymore."

"How can you say that?! Raymond is bound to try something again!"

"We have prevented his coming back in time and he's starting to have trouble with his powers as we speak. Everything is taken care of, dr. Wells."

"Yeah, everything but _this_!" He pointed himself. "I made the sacrifice to come here! I saved he word from you bleeding into it and this is the thanks I get?!"

"Your world was never really our concern, dr. Wells. We only ever wanted you to seal the rift so we could keep existing."

"Then fuck you! And fuck you all over again! I just… I _need_ to get back there! I'm _begging_ you here!" He truly didn't know what to do or say anymore, feeling as though wrongfully thrown into prison with no way out _ever_. Well, ok, technically he _was_ guilty of some pretty heavy sins, but in his opinion, Raymond was more deserving of such a punishment if all Wells wanted to do now was to just help his city, help his friends, his _family_ and be the hero. All Ronnie wanted was destruction of the world and timeline itself.

Eventually, he grew tired of being mad, of screaming obscenities at something that didn't even care, its voice not even wavering once, just remaining this calm wave and he hated _it_ even more for that.

Then, something remarkable happened. The colors around him shifted into a scene, a memory as it seemed and Harry could only stare, hypnotized as he saw Snow, his precious _Caitlin_ kneeling on the ground right next to his immobile body, desperately trying to bring him back when calling out to him, begging him not to leave her and to hold on. Just when Allen found her and took over in his resuscitation made Harrison realized this truly happened. The night of the particle accelerator explosion.

"Dr. Wells, we know how much you care for this woman and as you can see, she does for you, too, but you _have_ to be patient. If it's any consolation, according to my knowledge, you _will_ leave this place. But it is not up to you."

"Not up to me?" He frowned. "Then up to _whom_? You? You're holding me here right now!"

"The way will be shown to you soon, dr. Wells. You just need to be patient."

"Yeah, patient. Like I don't have trouble with _that_ already!" he murmured angrily under his breath.

* * *

The door to Caitlin's apartment opened and then closed and she stuck her head out of the kitchen to see Barry walking in and falling to her couch just like every other night ever since Harry had gone into the speedforce.

"Barry?" she finally braved it out and asked, walking to the living room and sitting in the chair near the couch. She liked having him in her apartment, she really did. He made her feel like she wasn't alone and she appreciated that, but she knew it was time to let him go because this wasn't right nor fair to him and some other significant party. "Barry, I am truly grateful for what you've been doing for me recently," she picked up again, just needing to get it over with before she started to feel as though she couldn't do this just yet and maybe this was a conversation for another day. But it _had_ to be today because living like this made her feel guilty.

"Why do I feel like there's a but somewhere there coming?" he asked when meeting her eyes and that was when she finally noticed the expression he was wearing.

"Oh, God, I'm too late already, aren't I? Damn it! I knew I should've told you to leave sooner! I really appreciate having you here, Barry and I can't begin to tell you how much your support means to me, but…" yes, there it was, "but you're not single anymore. You have someone special by your side now and I know she can only be understanding for so long. You _are_ spending all of your nights in your best friend's, who happens to be a woman, apartment."

"Well, that someone special is as good as gone, I think," Barry admitted, leaning forward on his knees and hiding his face in his hands.

"Oh, God, I knew it! I knew I'd screw up!" Caitlin got worried, finally forgetting about her own problems for a moment before moving to the couch and immediately placing her hand on his shoulder. Or maybe she shouldn't be doing this? Maybe it wasn't up to her to comfort him anymore? Maybe it wasn't up to him either? Wasn't this already going too far?

She moved away, keeping a safe distance while just sitting by his side.

"You shouldn't be miserable just because I am," she said then, resting her hands on her knees. "Barry, if the short time I got to spend with Harry taught me anything, it's that you never know how much time you'll have and that once you love someone, you should just go for it. You shouldn't be wasting all this time sitting here with me. You should have been with her and I mean it."

Barry sighed and then rubbed his eyes before finally looking at Caitlin.

"Cait…" he began and then stopped, releasing another heavy sign.

"What is it?" she asked, not understanding his behavior. "Barry, just go over to her and fix this, ok? I'm sure you still can."

"She just…" he shook his head before looking her in the eye again and saying, "she said some things that made me think _again_."

"Again? About what?" Caitlin frowned.

"You know that I used to wonder whether we would make a good couple? I mean you and me," he finally confessed and she was stunned, just sitting there speechless for a moment before asking a barely audible, " _What_?"

"Don't worry. I'm not in love with you or something," he quickly assured her and she let out a breath of relief.

"Well, good, I guess… but… Where are you going with this?"

"Iris feels threatened by you. In fact, she told me she's felt that from the first moment she saw us together. That was even before Harry woke up."

"And she also saw how much I love Harry," Caitlin reminded, still not understanding.

"Yeah. But in her opinion it doesn't mean that you don't have feelings for me somewhere there, too."

"I don't, Barry. I never had… Wait… did you?" she suddenly asked.

"Maybe." He shrugged and it was as though a ton of bricks just fell on her head. "It was back in college when we met. I had such a crush on you then," he confessed and then laughed nervously when scratching his head.

"You never told me that," Caitlin said, still in shock.

"Because you never seemed interested in me that way. You kept talking other guys to me. Especially Harrison. Remember?"

"I didn't even know him back then."

"True, but you already admired him. Even then he was your hero, though obviously for an entirely different reason. Maybe somehow a part of you already _knew,_ Cait."

"Well, all that I can say, Barry, is," she started slowly, carefully as not to hurt him and God forbid destroy their friendship that she held so dear, "that I don't think there'd be any real passion between us if we dated in college. I'm glad we remained platonic, because we can have this amazing friendship now. When it comes to Harry… maybe you're right, ever since I saw him, ever since talked to him for the first time, it was like I couldn't shake him. I wanted him. Maybe a part of me always did. Sure, you and me getting together when finding this amazing connection would've be great, but life doesn't work that way. I can't help but feel such a relationship would be… tepid," she finally confessed, mindful for his reaction.

He chuckled when actually nodding.

"You're probably right. We never seemed to connect on a romantic level. At least I know that now, because I found it with Iris."

"Well, we're definitely soulmates, though," Caitlin tried for a lighter tone. "Your friendship is the best thing that has ever happened to me along my relationship with Harrison," she assured him.

"And yet you call _us_ soulmates?" Barry seemed confused.

"You know, contrary to the popular and over-romanticized belief that your one true love has to absolutely be your soulmate, it isn't true."

"But… just to know, have you ever thought of _us_?" Barry suddenly grew curious as though once the subject was touched upon, he just wanted to get all the answers that must've been troubling him for quite some time now.

"Yes," she answered to his astonishment. "Don't look at me like that! It's nearly impossible not to wonder when you meet a nice and handsome guy like yourself. But as you said, there was never any passion between us."

"They do say it passes with time anyways," he provided.

"Maybe. But what remains is just as much special and you can always work on keeping the fire alive. When it doesn't exist to begin with… there isn't much sense in it, is there?"

He nodded silently, playing with his fingers while thinking.

"I'm sorry," he eventually apologized. "I… I didn't ruin anything here between us, did I?" he finally asked, nervous as he waited for her answer, avoiding looking at her in fear he would see something in her eyes that he didn't like.

"No, of course not, Barry," she assured him to his relief and placed her hand on his shoulder, feeling like it was all right now that they got it all out into the open. "We're the same best friends we always were."

"Good." He finally met her eyes, smiling to her.

"Now, go to Iris and explain that to her, ok?" Caitlin advised, taking her hand away. "Words can't express how grateful I am to have you in my life and how much I appreciate your friendship, but the truth is that it isn't just us anymore. I found Harry and you found Iris. They need our attention. I may not have him by my side at the moment, but I won't lose my faith that we _will_ get him back."

"Good," Barry said, touching her hand, "because you shouldn't. He'll be back." He gave her hand a little squeeze and then heaved himself up, kissing her cheek as he walked to the hall.

"Go get her!" Caitlin called after him.

* * *

Harrison was speechless as he walked down the corridor of the Labs, pulled forward by Caitlin's voice. She was singing and he couldn't exactly make out the words, but it was beautiful anyway. He could listen to her forever…

_Wait,_ he then realized. He had never actually heard her sing, so was this just another trick the speedforce played on him?

Only as he emerged from around the corner, his mouth hung open as he saw his beautiful Caitlin holding a newborn.

"Isn't she beautiful, Harrison?" Caitlin stopped singing as he approached her and she looked over her shoulder.

The problem was that her eyes didn't meet his.

He turned around to see the man she was talking to, but he was nowhere to be found, just the familiar whirlwind of colors there and as he wanted to catch one more glimpse of the baby, they were both gone.

"What is this?!" he screamed. "What did I just see?!"

He wasn't sure whether it was his mind connecting the dots or _wanting_ to believe that or really the speedforce's voice in his head, but the answer was _the future_.

* * *

"Before you slam the door into my face, know that I am in love with you!" Barry blurted out the moment Iris opened. "I love _you_ , ok? I seemed to know this from the moment I saw you and I'd been looking for the right time to ask you out and I was too slow, I admit that! I shouldn't have! I should have spoken up right away! I love Caitlin, I do, but _only_ as a sister, as my best friend, ok?" He kept on going, realizing his slip-up, so he immediately explained it all whereas Iris just stood there, speechless. "There was never anything between us. _Never_. We were always just friends! She was actually the one to smack me over the head that I was still in her apartment whereas I should've been with you! I'm sorry, ok? She really needed me and I was there, because I'm always there for the people I care about, but I should've been by your side as well, because you needed me, too! I'm sorry I didn't see that before and just assumed you'd wait and be ok with it all, but…" He stopped, taking a breather as he suddenly seemed to have run out of air. By now Iris seemed amused, folding her arms over her chest, ready for more and he kind of picked up on that, because he smiled before he began again, "Take me back? I promise I'll do better!"

"You're such a lovable dork, did you know that?" she eventually just asked, reaching out and grabbing a handful of his jacket as she pulled him into her apartment.

* * *

"'Thought I'd find you here," Caitlin said when lowering herself onto a stool by the bar. "I was so busy crying after Harry and Barry was so busy taking care of me that we all forgot about you and I'm sorry for that, Cisco," she then added, watching her friend just sitting there, staring at his drink. He hadn't shaved for a while now and really, she should've seen the signs sooner.

"It's ok," he eventually said, taking a sip before placing the glass back on the bar. "You loved him. You had the right to fall apart."

"You had, too. Cisco, he's your best friend," Caitlin began again when placing her hand on the guy's shoulder and squeezing gently. "I know you love him as well and that you feel guilty for building that device, but I'm here to tell it wasn't your fault. You couldn't have predicted what would happen. Even Harry couldn't."

"He was too busy fighting Ronnie to worry about the device on top of it all. He trusted me, Cait and I let him down." Finally, Cisco met her eyes and the haunted look she saw reflected in his terrified her to the bone. How come she'd lost the sight of him? It was unacceptable. She had the right to grief and Barry had the right to comfort her, yes, but they'd been so wrapped up in their little friendship bubble for such a long time now that they forgot to extend it to the people close to them.

She reached out and pulled stunned Cisco into her arms, her hands running over his back soothingly.

"It wasn't your fault," she repeated one more time so it would sink in, "and he would tell you the same thing. Now, I _know_ we can get him back. We _will_ get him back. And I am so, so sorry I wasn't a good enough friend to you, Cisco, but I promise you this will change. Now, let's abandon drinking and head home, ok? What do you say for a series marathon? You keep telling me I should watch the Walking Dead. How about we do that for a while and then come back to work and start fresh? What do you say?"

He didn't say anything, but he did nod against her and she could've sworn she heard him releasing a silent sob as his body shook slightly.

Then she let go of him and let him pay his tap before they headed to the door.

Because this was what friends did and Barry had taught her that.


	13. Chapter 13

Barry couldn't not smile when opening his eyes and feeling a warm body still in his arms, his face so close to the dark curls that all it took for him was to shift slightly and he smelt her shampoo, eventually placing a soft kiss there.

It was just another day of his life, yet now they all felt so much more different as he finally got to know how it was to have the one person you loved most by your side. Sure, his relationship with Iris was still fresh, but he stood by the notion that once you knew, you just knew. He had to meet _the one_ in order to recognize her and once he did, he didn't even have to wonder. He just _knew_. His own crush on Caitlin all those years prior and all the times during which he'd been thinking whether they might actually be good together as more than just friends, now seemed silly. It was obvious that that wouldn't have worked, because it never felt like _this_.

In the end, he could only smile since he was sure Caitlin had that kind of love in her life already as well… and that was the moment he stilled, reminding himself that Harry was still gone, still trapped in the speedforce and so far, they hadn't been able to get him back. They figured they would have to find a way to open the rift and maybe push Ronnie in there in order for the speedforce to return Wells, but all of those ideas were so far theoretical.

"Good morning," Iris said just then when turning around to face him. "Oh, no," she immediately followed with. "I know this face. This is your worried face. What's wrong?"

"Nothing," he assured her quickly when reaching to her face and stroking her cheek. "At least nothing concerning us. I just thought how lucky I am to have found you and I thought that I finally know what the kind of a love that Caitlin and Harry always had, feels like and…"

"And you immediately felt guilty that you're enjoying yourself whereas he's still trapped," Iris guessed correctly. "But Barry, none of us forgot about him, ok? Not even me," she assured him and he loved how she always seemed to be his strength. They hadn't been together all that long, but he could swear it felt like they'd always been. And it was beyond amazing. "You will get him back, I'm sure of it," she then added when cupping his face and kissing him good morning. "If you want, I can pay an invisible visit to Mercury Labs to see if they maybe have the technology we need to open the speedforce back up."

Barry chuckled. "Nice one, Iris."

"I'm not kidding! I'm serious! I want to help Caitlin and Harry, too. I really do. I still feel awful that I suspected she might be falling for you while what she was really doing was grieving and you were only trying…"

"We got past that already," Barry interrupted his girlfriend, pressing his forehead against her own as they were still lying down facing each other. "Besides, first I think we need to figure out a way to locate Ronnie and stop him. He's still out there and it's killing us all that we can't seem to find him."

"I can help you with that, too. You basically need a device that can stop a metahuman."

"None of that, miss West!" Barry protested again. "We'll deal with it all right. Don't you worry. I don't want you to put yourself in any unnecessary danger, ok? It's enough that one perfect couple has been torn apart."

"So now we're perfect, hah?" Iris teased and he couldn't help but smile at her and then kiss her some more.

The kiss pretty much escalated into much more, especially since he'd been ready for her since the moment he'd woken up, having her in his arms already being enough to arouse him.

"Someone's got a morning call," Iris teased, suddenly straddling him, the sheet slipping from her naked body. His eyes immediately opened widely, taking in her beauty and feeling his heart swell with nothing but love. Well, technically some other part of him was swollen with desire, but weren't those two feelings always connected when love was already there?

When Iris allowed him to sink inside of her, he finally managed to forget about all the trouble he still had at work for few more precious minutes.

* * *

Caitlin and Cisco were both early at work as usual those days. Whereas it was nothing surprising when it came to the first – well, minus all the late mornings she'd had so far with Harry – it was for Cisco. Then again, they both assured Barry he shouldn't put his own life on hold just because Harry was gone and that he was more than welcomed to find the right balance. So far, he'd been doing pretty well, not being very late to work. The change happened in Cisco since before he'd almost always slept in. Now sometimes he was at the Labs even earlier than Caitlin, desperate to bring his best friend home, desperate to get him back. It was better than taking to drinking, for sure, he thought with a frown, not very proud of his lowest of moments.

Caitlin was just watching him work, thinking how much she'd missed before when only truly caring for Barry as for her best friend. Somehow along the way they'd both neglected Cisco and that was their dire mistake. Harry had known better and she smiled at the memory of him and Cisco always being so close and working so well together. In fact, she'd made a promise to herself that she would spend more time with the later and so far she was nothing but grateful for that. Cisco was an amazing friend, one worth getting to know better and to form a deeper connection with. On some level, right now she felt closer to him than to Barry since Barry had never been as attached to Harry as both she and the other guy.

_Harry_ , how much she missed him and how much she wanted him back.

She wasn't giving up. She was sure that eventually they would bring him back. It was only a matter of when.

"Damn it!" Cisco cursed, hitting his fists against the desk as he rose from his seat. "It didn't work. We have to find, yet, one more way to get the speedforce to open up."

"Honestly, I think that the only way is to get Ronnie," Caitlin voiced her opinion.

"Yeah, but it doesn't work when we have no way of knowing where he is!"

"Probably depleted of his powers somewhere," they heard coming from the entrance and they saw Barry standing there. "I mean, just think about it," he followed with when making his way to them and handing them both coffees he'd picked from Jitters after his breakfast date with Iris. "The speedforce prevented him from going back in time and wanted to imprison him. Harry had to go in instead. Now, what's stopping Ronnie from making the trip back again? He must be depleted of his powers. Maybe that's exactly why our satellite can't locate him."

"You forgot about one thing, though, Barry," Caitlin followed, slowly sipping on her coffee. "If he really didn't have his speed anymore, then Harry wouldn't have such problems catching him in the first place."

"Well, maybe it happened over time. Maybe he was running away from Harry so fast that he eventually ran out of his speed?" Barry suggested.

"The bad news would be that with no speed, it's doubtful the speedforce would even take him in Harry's place," Cisco provided nervously when running a hand through his hair.

"Not necessary. His metahuman DNA would still be unchanged. You just can't take back the evolution there," Caitlin answered.

"We're still grasping at straws here, guys," Cisco sighed. "It's all purely theoretical."

"But maybe now we can try looking for him the old-fashioned way?" Barry suggested.

* * *

Ironically, in the end it was Ronnie who found them.

Even with his powers pretty much gone, it wasn't hard for him to get inside S.T.A.R. Labs as he'd used to be an engineer there, therefore no matter the security Cisco might've put up by now, he was sure he could get through anything.

And he did. That was his fist success and he was counting for more. He needed to get down to the particle, craving more power. It'd taken him literal ages – at least for a speedster – to get back to Central City and he needed to get his speed back for all costs as well. He did, yet, chose a very early time when he was sure no one would be in the Labs, because he really didn't have the strength to defend himself if they tried to capture him. He was well-aware of the fact that he was basically arriving at the lion's den, at the very place he was supposed to avoid for all cost, but it wasn't as though he had a choice in the matter.

He didn't foresee one thing, though – that Caitlin Snow showed up at work earlier and earlier with every passing day now, not really able to sleep much.

Raymond managed to get far as he was already in the accelerator when he reached for the panel on the wall, approaching his first try at turning it back on, not even caring for all the people his actions could potentially hurt all over the city. He just needed _more_ speed. Just then, he tripped the alarm, momentarily freezing in place and then working twice as hard to reach his goal.

"Oh, no, you won't!" Caitlin truly saw red, so angry she was once the security cam feed provided her with the image of the intruder. "No speed so far, I see," she then added in satisfaction when reaching for a gun and making her way towards the accelerator. She would shoot him if she had to. Not that she would actually kill him, but she would definitely incapacitate him long enough to be able to drag him to the pipeline that was, so conveniently, right there!

"Stay where you are! Hands up!" she screamed when coming to a stop in the entrance to the accelerator and pointing the gun at the man, her hands not even shaking as she did so.

He froze for a moment, surprised to hear her voice and then he slowly stopped working on the panel and turned to her with his hands obediently up in the air. Too easy a surrender, came across her mind as she gripped the gun firmer.

"Hey, Caity."

"Don't call me that!"

"Still missing that old fool?" he asked with a smirk on his face. "I could never quite believe that you fell for him. What did you see him in him anyways?"

"What I _do_. He may be gone, but he's not dead."

"Oh, really? And how are you planning on getting him out? Even if you could get me, and I'm telling you that you won't, you can't open the speedforce."

"Why wouldn't I get you?" she asked. "If you had your powers, you've been gone already."

"Touché," he admitted with a nod, the smile still there on his face and it unsettled her, making her wonder whether he had an ace in the hole and she started to rethink her choice to go after him. Maybe she should've waited for back-up. Then again, it wasn't like she could just allow him to turn the accelerator back on, was it? "You just made one wrong assumption here, _Caity_ ," he emphasized just to spite her.

"Yeah? And what's that?" she sighed in theatrical exasperation.

"They're not entirely gone," he answered and before she could even squeeze the trigger, he tapped into the very last of his powers, a reserve he was saving for later, but he would have to use it now. He sped right past her, making sure to graze against her on his way out of the Labs, shocking her with his fading lightning.

In a flash, Ronnie was gone and Caitlin dropped to the ground, lifeless.

Soon enough, clicking sounds could be heard in the corridor, indicating that a woman in heels was running.

"Oh, my God!" Iris West called out. "Barry! Get in here! I found her!"

Barely had the man appeared in the entrance, he paled, seeing Iris on the floor right next to his unconscious best friend. He truly felt as though the ground disappeared from under his feet and when he lowered himself to his knees as well, he bruised them, having no control over his emotions or the reactions of his body.

"She's… she's not breathing!" Iris provided with the information when pressing her finger into Caitlin's neck and then looking back at Barry in horrification.

If only he'd arrived at the Labs sooner, he thought, running his hand through his hair shakily before getting down and beginning the resuscitation. If only this morning he hadn't slept in… _If only_. Though deep down inside he knew it wasn't really his fault. He didn't do anything differently that day than he'd done the past few weeks, arriving at the Labs at his usual time. It was Caitlin who was early. And Ronnie. Even with the defenses Cisco had put in place, Raymond still managed to get in. Then again, they didn't exactly anticipate him to try that as it seemed suicidal for him to show up at the Labs.

"Come back, damn it!" Barry screamed as he started on the heart massage, praying for Caitlin to wake up. "Come back! Harry needs you, ok?! He has to have someone to come home to! We all need you, Cait!" Only she still wasn't waking up.

While Barry was desperately trying to bring her back, to make her breath again, it seemed like he'd come back in time to the night of the explosion, remembering exactly that he'd done something like this already, that he'd brought Harry back. Caitlin had been right there by his side, crying and begging for the man she loved to be all right.

Just like Barry now did with her. Because he did love her. It wasn't romantic love, he knew that now, but it was love nevertheless since just like people it also came in all different sizes and shades.

"What… Oh, my God!" they heard Cisco who must've just arrived, Barry suddenly registering that the alarm stopped, so that must've been his friend doing since he himself immediately ran to Iris the moment she called him. "What happened?! Oh, God! No! Will she be all right?!"

"We don't know that, Cisco, I'm sorry," Iris answered him since Barry was too busy resuscitating Cait.

"Maybe we could switch?" Iris offered then whereas Cisco just stood there, tears in his eyes, his hands on his mouth, still not able to believe what he was just witnessing.

"No!" Barry screamed, massaging Caitlin's heart even harder before blowing the needed air into her lungs. "I can do this! Damn it, Cait! I am not losing you! Come BACK!" he practically hollered the last word and suddenly, sparks of electricity ran from his hands and Caitlin's body jumped up and down under the power of it.

Iris and Cisco froze, not able to believe their own eyes that this just happened whereas Barry took his hands away from Caitlin and looked at them in shock.

"You got… Dude, you finally manifested powers," Cisco eventually said in a low voice.

"Guys…" They all immediately looked back at Caitlin who was awake, just now supporting her upper body on her elbows as she heaved herself up, confusion clear in her eyes. "What happened? What am I…? Why am I so weak? Why am I on the floor?" she asked one question after the other.

"You're ok!" Barry called out happily and immediately pulled her close to hug her, but then he moved away just as fast and she nearly fell back to the ground.

"Barry, what the hell?"

"I… I can't… It may be dangerous for you to touch me," he admitted.

"What do you mean _dangerous_?" Caitlin asked with a frown marrying her features. "Wait… Ronnie! He was here! Did you get him?"

They all shook their heads at her.

"Damn it! I should've shot him when I had the chance!"

* * *

"I'm fine!" Caitlin had to actually scream that, because the team refused to lay off of her. Well, ok, if she were to be honest, if wasn't the _team_ per se, it was Barry. Iris was gone by now, saying something about a work thing and Cisco was simply standing in the door to her lab, his eyes not leaving Barry's figure for a second.

"Dude!" the man in question finally got tired of this. "This is making me so uncomfortable! What are you even doing?!"

"So you aren't the least bit curious about your _powers_?!" Cisco finally burst and Barry only shot him a look.

"You do realize that Caitlin was biologically dead there for a moment, do you? We need to make sure _she_ is all right and now that she claims that everything is fine, she most definitely needs _rest_ , not doing more test and this time on me! Besides, we already know what they're gonna show!"

"No, we're not!" Cisco still argued and Cait rolled her eyes at that.

"Guys, stop!" she finally said when heaving herself up from the lab bed and immediately stumbling.

Barry was by her side in no time, holding her up and once she was safely sat back on the bed, he suddenly let go of her as though her skin brunt him.

"Barry, it's ok. I don't think you can hurt me. Feel free to touch people," she encouraged him.

"But…"

"I don't heal very single wound when I touch a person and trust me, even a paper cut qualifies," she followed with in her usual scientific manner. "We all need to learn how to use our powers and control them just like Harry did…" She did wince there.

"Ok, but none of that truly matters right now," Barry still argued. "You've just…"

"I'm hungry, ok? I was to eat breakfast here, but Ronnie surprised me and I must have low blood sugar level. Can you maybe bring me something?"

"On it!" Barry immediately said and turned to leave when Cisco lift up a hand.

"None of that! I see you and I hear you, trust me," he assured his friends, "but you two have just been through something big, so let me bring the food, ok? You just wait here! Oh, and by the way," he turned in the door, "I totally call that you can electroshock people back to life just because you took over Caitlin when you were trying to resuscitate Harry. Nice one. Maybe you can make quite the healing team or… wait a sec!" He turned fully back to them, an idea sparked in his brain if the look on his face was anything to go by.

"What is it, Cisco?" Caitlin asked in curiosity.

"Lightnings… electricity… speedforce… Barry, your powers may just come in handy in opening it back up! Maybe we could use you to get to Harry!"

"That's…" Barry actually gasped. "That might actually work, but you're forgetting about one thing."

"And that being?"

"Ronnie. We need to capture him first."

"Seeing as he's human now with metahuman DNA and he won't try breaking into S.T.A.R. Labs again… that's not gonna be a problem, will it?

For the first time since she'd seen Harry disappear into the speedforce, Caitlin actually felt hopeful, her face illuminated in a real smile and she instantly forgot about her hunger or what she'd just been through. This was good. This was actually a beginning of a plan.

* * *

"Iris West, a reporter for CC Picture News, here to interview dr. McGee," the brunette introduced herself, fidgeting slightly and doing her best to hide her nervousness. "I'm sorry," she then added on seeing that the receptionist picked up on her jumpiness, "this is my first real breakthrough." She hoped that explanation would be enough.

As the receptionist directed her to the right level and another one led her to dr. McGee's office, she did her best to remember the way. She got this.

* * *

"Why isn't Iris here?" Caitlin asked while she and Barry waited for Cisco to come back with food, having already exhausted the topic of their powers and what it could mean for Harry. "Wasn't she concerned about the recent… development?"

"She was," Barry admitted, "but only for what it could mean for _me_. She wasn't scared. I think she actually understands when having come through something similar as well. I think I'm not even capable of hurting her since she can just morph right into her ghost's stage. It happened once while we…" He suddenly blushed, turning his eyes away and Caitlin opened her mouth in surprise.

"Oh, my God! Did she change during sex?!" she exclaimed.

"Come on! Cait! Lower your voice!" he immediately chastised her in embarrassment.

"Oh, but this is soooo good!" Caitlin started laughing.

"So not making _me_ feel good! Well, all right! It happened once and she did morph right back, saying she got… overwhelmed."

"Must've been a good shag," Caitlin still joked.

"Who are you, Cisco?! Just drop it, ok?! And if you say a word to him about this…"

"Oh, don't worry, friend, your secret is safe with me! It's not like Harry hadn't vibrated any particularly _useful_ part of himself."

"Hey! I so do not need a reminder of _that!_ "

Caitlin saddened at the memory of the man she loved. If truly felt like ages since she'd last seen him and all she wanted was to just sink back into his arms.

"Hey," there was care in Barry's soft voice now as he placed his hand on her own and squeezed gently. "We finally may be on the right track to getting him back."

"I know," she responded with a nod, forcing a small smile to her face. "I know, Barry."

"Good. Because we _will._ We won't stop till we do."

"Still… even despite Iris not being scared for or of you, why did she just leave? What could be more important than making sure we're all ok?"

Barry did ponder over that once hearing Caitlin's quite accurate assumption and in that moment two things happened - Cisco came back carrying breakfast and Barry's phone rang. It was Iris. And she was bearing news.

 


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can we just not talk about how this story is reposted? Forget it ever happened. I finally made the choice to continue with my writing.

"Wow, Iris! Slow down!" Barry had to yell into his phone since apparently, his better half wouldn't stop talking. "Just... go back and tell me everything again, ok? Did I get it right? Did you actually _break_ into Mercury Labs?! Iris, do you have any idea how dangerous that was?!"

"Lovers' spat?" Cisco asked Caitlin, walking inside with bags filled with food for which the woman eagerly reached out.

She really wanted to sink her teeth into her absolute favorite bagel, but she also didn't want to keep her friend hanging, so she quickly relayed what had happened after her left – minus her discovering how Iris changed into her "ghost stage" during sex with Barry, of course – and finally started eating happily, smiling at her food.iri

Or maybe it wasn't just food. Maybe all the recent developments made her more hopeful. Maybe she could actually see a light in the tunnel, Harry being just out of her reach, but already close enough for her to actually believe they could get him back soon.

By the time Barry, very pale and very angry, hung up, Caitlin managed to devour an entire bagel and was taking a sip of her coffee before reaching for another pastry. She was just so freaking hungry after everything that already happened and it was barely the beginning of their day! She wondered what still awaited them in hours to come.

Well, wasn't kept waiting to find out.

"You won't believe it, but…" Barry started when turning to them and scratching his head.

"Iris broke into Mercury Labs?" Cisco asked, having heard enough from their conversation. "You don't say! Why would your criminal girlfriend even do something like that? Has she started abusing her powers already?"

"Dude!" Barry exclaimed.

"What? I was just kidding! Or maybe not?" Cisco then risked it. "Come on, tell us everything."

"She was scheduled to interview dr. McGee of Mercury Labs and once that was over, she left, but actually came right back when using her powers. It wasn't for the article or anything, though. It was for us. For _you,_ actually." Barry turned to Caitlin and she shot him a surprised look.

"Your girlfriend broke the law for me?"

"Yeah. She heard Mercury Labs was developing some kind of a device that in theory should made it possible to operate in between dimensions and, if there are any, open up a way there."

"That's actually genius! I could kiss her! If we can take a look, we can totally free Harry!" Cisco got excited, but Caitlin could tell by the look on Barry's face that he still wasn't sure what to think of this whole situation. "Dude!" the guy then added, "all we need now is to locate and lure Ronnie into a trap so we could trade him for Harry! And with your powers, we can totally make it work!"

"Iris only got the pictures of the blueprints. I'm not sure the device is even built yet, let alone tested," Barry provided the info when scratching his head nervously.

"So? We can totally work with blueprints! I actually bet that Mercury Labs won't make it work. Thinking relative physics, to power a device so it could potentially open up a way into another dimension… that technology doesn't exist yet. Even the S.T.A.R. Labs was never able to find it and we did build the particle accelerator. That could've actually been the first step, but without it… But we got _you_ , dude!" Cisco patted Barry's shoulder. "You got the blueprints? I need to take a look right away!"

"Yeah. Iris needed to head to work and write that interview down, but she sent me an e-mail. Let me check…" Barry grabbed his phone.

"Ok, let me transfer this to our server… You two, off to work on those powers of yours, Barry, because they're definitely gonna be the key!"

* * *

The news might've made them all think it would all go easy from now on, but they were wrong. In fact, difficulties just began as Barry had been spending nearly his every wake hour in the lab, trying to get a hold on his powers while Cisco kept on studying the blueprints, building various constructions till he put them all together to make them into Mercury Labs' device. Iris popped in and out occasionally, this time not giving Barry any hard time for neglecting her as it was actually her idea in the first place. She wanted nothing more than for Caitlin to get the man she loved back, herself feeling a little guilty for being happy whereas another woman was suffering. That was also the reason to why she pushed Barry to work harder on his powers and to spend more of his time in the Labs rather than with her, though she did came in handy in his workplace as well when he was practicing. He couldn't possibly hurt her while she was using her powers, making herself either invisible or transparent enough for objects to just fly through her body. It'd actually taken Barry two days to manage to electrify anything at all and he started to think maybe this one time with Caitlin was just been a fluke, but it wasn't. It wasn't because it was Iris who got to him to finally use his powers and was working with him during the little free time she had.

Right now, though, she decided to take care of another member of the team while still feeling guilty about suspecting she had an affair with Barry. Everyone in the Labs had something to do now. Everyone was working hard. Everyone except Caitlin. She'd kept on scanning the city, looking for Ronnie and trying to come up with a way to lure him into a trap, but it was nothing in comparison to what Cisco was focusing on – now proudly informing he was able to improve the device and made it so much smaller than Mercury Labs intended for it to be – and Barry who was working on controlling his powers and using them whenever he needed. Caitlin was somehow left out and with computers and satellites doing most of the work for her, Iris could only imagine that she was slowly going out of her mind, just feeling stuck as she waited for her man to be rescued.

"How are you holding up, Cait?" Iris asked when they were already seated in Jitters over cups of their favorites. She really wanted to make the effort and get to know the woman closer as she liked her practically from the moment they'd interacted for the first time.

"I do what I can," Snow said in a feeble and tired voice as she nursed the cup of her coffee, not breaking a smile. "It's just… hard, I guess… You know, with the waiting. I've actually been trying to study my blood closer, but I can't seem to focus enough. Not without…" She bit on her lip and looked aside. "I don't even want to think about how long it's been, Iris. I miss him so much. I also don't want to think what happens if we don't…" She stopped right there, apparently not able to finish that sentence.

"Hey, we _will_ get him back, I can feel it. This is it. We got everything we need. We just need to wait a little bit longer for Barry and Cisco to figure out a way to power the device, but with Barry's powers…"

"The test results did come back very promising," Caitlin finally admitted, sending Iris's way a small smile. "But we still have to get Ronnie."

"You know, I might actually be able to help with that. Did I mention my dad's a cop?" When Caitlin shook her head, Iris continued, "I was thinking of asking him to track Ronnie down for me, pretending that I have a friend who's scared of him. He might be an abusive ex-boyfriend and someone might need to be sure he would stay clear of them."

"Do you think it could work?"

"Probably. There's nothing my dad won't do for me, especially when it comes to any woman's safety. I'll try to find something out and then, once we know where he is, we'll set a trap. Of course we don't need to involve my dad in _that_."

"Then maybe it's not such a good idea to ask him at all," Cait voiced her opinion when thinking it all through, "because what if he later on checks up on Ronnie and finds him gone? If we throw him into the speedforce… he won't come back."

"But that won't be murder," Iris argued. "He abused his powers in the worst way possible and they want him there to pay for it. Dr. Wells is the innocent party here. He did the most selfless thing when taking Ronnie's place."

A shadow passed through Caitlin's face at the memory of one of the worst days of her life. "He wasn't always like that," she then decided to inform Iris. "He was actually quite the jerk, always nice only towards me, Cisco or Barry. My falling for him wasn't rational at all because when I think of it, I consider myself a person who pays attention to those kinds of things, to people being nice to other people and Harry… Well, he was always just Harry. I couldn't put a label on him. He could be cold, closed-off and even cruel to those who seemed to deserve it, but there was also this whole other side to him. I guess I could always sense there was a soft, loving and sensitive man hiding beyond all that layers. I must have since I can't imagine falling for him otherwise."

Iris, to Caitlin's astonishment, nodded in understanding. Snow thought that none of what she said made sense, so a surprise, indeed, awaited her.

"I get it. It's not like you can choose the man you fall for. And love changes us, Caitlin. I think he always had those feelings for you as well. Though, I can't tell for sure since he was in a coma when I was a ghost roaming the S.T.A.R. Labs' halls," they both chuckled. "You two just make sense and belong to each other. And that is exactly why we need to pull him out. Also, as I think of it some more, he totally always was a good man, just hid it well. Maybe he was afraid of getting hurt. Maybe he did in the past."

Caitlin nodded. "Yeah. That would be accurate."

"Exactly. I used to have mixed feelings about him. Especially after he confessed to knowing of the risk when it came to the particle accelerator, but now I believe his personal expertise. He decided nothing would happen and it wouldn't have if it hadn't been for Ronnie."

Caitlin couldn't help it as her eyes shone with fresh tears. All that Iris just told her both made her feel better and touched her deeply.

"Now, let me try another approach," Iris suggested when reaching over the table to squeeze her friend's hand briefly. "I won't be asking my dad for help personally, but I will snoop around the precinct."

"I couldn't possibly ask you that. You already did that with Mercury Labs and Barry wasn't all too happy about it."

West just rolled her eyes in response. "Barry is too good of a boy. I bet he never broke any rule." She then winked at Cait. "What's the point of having such amazing powers if I can't use them to help my friends? I'm not robbing a bank, Cait. I'm helping you all to get a good man back." After that, Iris finished her coffee and said her goodbyes whereas Cait headed back to the Labs.

* * *

"Yatzee!" Cisco called out the next day and when Caitlin looked his way, she spotted him jumping up and down with his fist in the air.

"Is it done?" she asked in excitement that was hard to hide. Those days she always told herself to be careful and not to get ahead of herself in order to spare herself the heartache that would soon follow, but this time… She couldn't help it. Cisco looked like he finally cracked it.

"Take _that_ , M Labs!" he yelled. "My device is so much better! And it's actually gonna work!"

"Are you sure?" Caitlin queried when making her way to him and in the same moment Barry reminded, "Technically, Mercury Labs did invent it first, Cisco. You just… let's say… _improved_ their version."

"Well, dah! But I don't think they're gonna make it work! So take _that_!"

"And you were only able to do that because of the parts you took from the accelerator and the powers Barry developed, weren't you?" Caitlin backed his oldest friend up and Cisco just shot them a look.

"How about you're a genius, Cisco? What would we do without you, Cisco? You saved our asses, Cisco – or wait! – rather theass of someone you really want to get back!"

"Ok, ok, stop," Barry raised his hands up in a gesture of surrender. "We truly appreciate all of your input, Cisco."

"Better! But still not good enough!"

"Can we maybe get Harry back first? Because if this doesn't work, then we're getting ahead of ourselves," Cait said, though it was superhard for her to do. She didn't want to even acknowledge the possibility, but she had to prepare herself for it just the same, because if she let her herself fully believe this would work, she might end up being disappointed and hurt more than ever before. It was truly their _last_ hope as it seemed. The only other plausible solution would be giving Ronnie his speed back while turning the accelerator on and therefore provoking the speedforce to open up and swallow him. Still, they had no way of knowing whether it would 'spit' Harry out in the process and it would be putting everyone in the city in danger.

"Hey, it's gonna be ok, Cait," Cisco addressed her, his voice conveying a softer note. Caitlin was actually surprised that it was him who said it first and not Barry, but it was time to give him more credit since they had grown so much closer during Harry's absence. That being the only positive she could find in all of this and she knew Harry would like that. "This is gonna work. I know it."

"Of course it will!" They heard Iris making her way into the cortex. "I was trying to track Ronnie when using my dad's precinct when no one was around his office, but I think I've got a better idea! This!" She showed them the newest paper. "Mercury Labs is presenting the dimension splicer tonight. I'm pretty sure it's not gonna work," she winked Cisco's way, "but I also think Ronnie might show up. He's desperate for power and this is the only way he may have now as he won't risk sneaking into the Labs again."

"Gah!" Cisco exclaimed, suddenly appalled and they all looked at him, taken aback. "Dimension splicer? For real?! This name is terrible!"

"Oh, who cares!" Caitlin called out. "It seems like we'll only get this one chance. Let's make the best of it!"

* * *

Surprisingly, Iris proved herself to be excellent in the field and that was even without using her powers.

They decided Ronnie would most definitely recognize every one of them, but he wouldn't Iris. At least they hoped so, so the woman dolled herself up, making sure she didn't wear clothes or hair matching her usual style just in case he might connect her to Barry and therefore to the Labs as she entered the Mercury Labs presentation when using her journalist pass.

She almost thought Ronnie wouldn't come, but she finally spotted him and when gently grazing herself against him, injected him with a basically harmless toxin Caitlin had cooked in her lab earlier. The needle was hidden in Iris's new watch – courtesy of Cisco, which made them all feel like they were actually in some spy movie rather than doing whatever they had to in order to get Harrison back.

Before Raymond knew what was happening, he was collapsing, losing his consciousness and Iris immediately screamed, grabbing her phone and informing she was calling 911.

Only she didn't, obviously.

Instead, it was Barry and Cisco who eventually got in, dressed like medics and made a show before taking Ronnie out on a stretcher. The presentation started just when it got quiet again, people forgetting about the man who fainted and turning their attention to Dr. McGee on the scene.

In the meantime, Barry and Cisco with Iris's help got Ronnie to S.T.A.R. Labs' van parked on the back and after they all jumped in, Caitlin immediately drove away.

"Oh, my God! I can't believe it worked so smoothly!" She exhaled a breath a relief, yet knowing the hardest part was still ahead.

"My girl!" Barry paid Iris a compliment. "With this set of skills and in this knock-out dress, you could be the next Bond's girl!"

"Honestly, Barry, whereas I do appreciate the compliment, I'd rather be all yours, because I would never let anyone objectify me the way Bond always does women."

"Now I'm even more in love with you, honey!"

Just then Cisco made a disgusting sound, telling them to get a room once this was all over and stop for now.

They drove to the abandoned airstrip he'd found just outside the city as fast as they could, yet while making sure they didn't break any speed limits. It wouldn't do them any good if they were caught transporting an unconscious man against his will.

"What if he wakes up too soon?" Iris asked when glancing at her watch and then back at Ronnie's sleeping form.

"He won't. I took into account his speedster metabolism since we also need to remember that despite his powers being gone, his DNA remains changed. Frankly, I'd be more worried that he might _not_ wake up."

Iris shrugged. "Would serve him well," she just said, shooting the immobile man a look full of disgust. "For what he did and tried to do to us all."

Barry searched for her hand and took it, squeezing gently as he remembered about Iris being dead in the potential life Ronnie could create.

"Ok, we're here. Now it's all up to you, guys!" Caitlin informed, stopping the car and killing the engine. "Get down to work!" She was actually glad she didn't have a more important role to play here than to just drive, because she could already feel her body starting to shake in nervous, almost sickening anticipation. It could be Harry waiting for her at the end of this road, but… what if…? She swallowed hard, closing her eyes, taking a deep breath and steadying herself. She had to be strong for both him and herself. She had to believe it would be him. That she would get him back and they would never have to part ever again.

Iris gently took the device Cisco had built out of the car while the men transported Ronnie from the van onto the ground. It wasn't like he deserved a pillow.

Caitlin finally exited the vehicle when Cisco was preparing his creation. He looked her way, a silent question in his eyes and she just nodded, giving him the ok, her hand squeezing over a small syringe. She wanted Ronnie to be aware of the fact that the speedforce was taking him in, so she planned to wake him up when injecting him with the cure just before throwing him in there.

"Barry, it's your turn," Cisco said when turning the device on. It immediately flashed with blue light that seemed rather beautiful, if not a little eerie in the setting sun.

Barry took a deep breath as he rolled up his sleeves, making his way to the device whereas everyone else moved back.

"I present you with…" Cisco started, savoring the anticipation, "the breacher!"

"That's your name for it?" Iris raised her eyebrows.

"Don't pretend you don't like it! In comparison to dimension splicer, it's brilliant!"

Caitlin and Iris exchanged amused looks and it made the first feel a little bit better. Well, maybe she didn't feel like throwing up anymore, instead being just jittery, but it was a plus nevertheless.

Barry braced himself and finally used his powers, an electric current flowing from his hands straight onto the device's special battery designed by Cisco and… They all held their breaths, waiting and waiting and eventually…

Caitlin's heart sunk since she was almost sure they failed and were never…

Only just then they saw something resembling an explosion of light hung in the air, looking like a portal slowly opening, widening. I could also be called a breach, Cait thought in that minute when hope swelled in her heart and her eyes opened widely…

Then, before anyone could stop her, she ran forward, standing right next to Barry who was still powering the device and she injected Ronnie with the counter poison.

His eyes opened widely as he gasped, touching the spot on his neck where she not so gentle stubbed him. His eyes only enlarged more when he noticed her, too surprised to even think of attacking and then…

He screamed when some invisible force pulled him forward and straight into the freshly opened breach. He tried to fight it, his nails actually screeching the concrete ground as he turned to his belly, but to no avail. Soon, he was gone, sucked inside and…

It all happened way too fast.

The light suddenly disappeared along with the breach. Cisco's device blew up, sending sparks all over and they all covered their eyes, Barry actually throwing himself at Caitlin to protect her with his body as they both tumbled to the ground.

Yet, they weren't the only one.

"Holy shit!" they heard Cisco cursing loudly. Then again, Cait thought, he didn't sound disappointed. Quite the contrary.

She never in her life got up so fast, unceremoniously pushing Barry aside so she could free herself and she was right there, few feet away from the spot she landed in with her friend, getting to a very naked man lying on the ground and shaking with cold.

"Oh, my God!" both she, Barry and Iris seemed to exclaim in the same time. "Harry!" that was Caitlin alone, not at all bothered by his nakedness since she'd already seen it all. She put her hands on his shoulders and gently turned him on his back so she could look at his face and make sure it was, indeed, her Harry.

There was fresh stubble on his cheeks, indicating the time passing by and maybe his own lack of clothes meant the same. Maybe whatever power hid in the speedforce, it was too strong and eventually burnt all of his clothes off. Then again, Caitlin couldn't care less in the moment, just happy she got him back, that it was Harry in her arms now. Her eyes filled up with tears as he finally locked them with the familiar depths of his blues.

"Snow?" he asked and that was truly all she needed to burst out crying and cling to his body, holding on too him like there was no tomorrow. In fact, she vowed never to let him go ever again, the entire world be damned. "Snow. I... God, I can't believe it."

"You're here. You're home, Harry."

"But _how_?"

"Can we just skip that for now and get straight to the point in which this man is lying on the ground _completely naked_? Can we maybe give him some clothes, please?" Cisco asked and when Caitlin forced herself to let go of Harry's arms and look behind herself, she saw the three of their friends standing there rather awkwardly, trying to look everywhere but not at their older friend's flesh.

"Wait… let me…" Cait grabbed the scarf she was wearing around her neck and undid the tie.

"Um… Snow, I think you're gonna need a bigger scarf," Harry pointed out and just then Cisco covered his eyes with his hands, groaning loudly, "Oh, God, please, no! I don't want to hear or see _any more_!"

They all, minus Ramon, started laughing and Caitlin couldn't be happier. She just now got her final proof that it was Harry back safe and sound.

She quickly cupped his face and kissed him hard and straight on the lips, her tears wetting his skin as she couldn't stop crying. Though, this time it was all from joy.

"It makes me think we should've undressed Ronnie before we threw him in there. Then we would've had clothes to…" Iris started.

"So you could see, yet, _another_ man naked that is _not_ your boyfriend?" Barry actually seemed appalled. "Not on my watch, miss West!"

Iris laughed and then she just shook her head before heading to the van. "You did dress like medics and you did have a stretcher with… Eureka!" she called out when coming back with a blanket in her hands and then she threw it Harry and Caitlin's way. "Works better than the scarf." She winked at Cait when she helped Harry up as he already covered himself. He was still shaky and maybe it was also from exhaustion or lack of nourishment. Caitlin didn't even try to think right now about what had happened to him in the speedforce, whether he was hungry or whether he slept or maybe none of that was important in there. For now, taking him back to the Labs was all that mattered. That and the fact that she was never letting him out of her sight and probably the general vicinity of her hands ever again.

"That's definitely big enough, thank you, Iris, for your quick wit!" Cisco turned to the woman, so she smiled at him.

"You're welcome, Cisco."

"Too late, though. I swear, it's like his junk is burnt into my brain," he immediately complained.

"You're welcome, Ramon," Harry provided teasingly and then he chuckled on hearing his friend groan in response.

"We should've just left you in there!"

"We both know you wouldn't stop till you got me back. What was that about Raymond anyways? How did you, guys, pull it off?"

Cisco had to admit Harry right, but he didn't exactly have to say it, did he now?

 


	15. Chapter 15

On their way to the Labs no one really said anything as they were still too shocked with the recent developments and the overwhelming relief they felt that they'd finally managed to succeed in getting Harrison back. Caitlin wasn't driving anymore, by now sitting in the van with her arm slipped through his, her head resting on his shoulder, her hand in his hand, the fingers stroking the skin there gently. She refused to let him go, still finding it hard to believe that he was suddenly there by her side, that she could finally touch him. There was really no need for talking at the moment. They enjoyed each other's company and being surrounded by friends, the people who'd risked quite a lot for them. Somehow, starting as a group brought together by a sheer accident, they're grown to become friends for life, family even, made in a fire. Snow actually liked that idea.

They found themselves back in the Labs pretty fast, Cisco by the wheel already driving inside the garage and automatically closing the door behind them, the lights flipping on over their heads, welcoming them home.

Harrison wrapped himself tighter with the blanket and when the van finally stopped and the door slid open, he was relieved to find himself in such a familiar and dear to him place despite its recent history.

Soon enough, they all entered the cortex and Barry grabbed some S.T.A.R. Labs clothes to give to Wells with a smile that he should maybe get dressed. The older man nodded in gratitude, seeming a little bit speechless as he took in all the people in the room, eventually his warm and loving gaze settling on Caitlin.

"Snow…" he started hoarsely and stopped immediately, sighing heavily since he felt stupid when still standing there covered in a blanket. "I… I… I'll… go take a shower quickly and…" He waved the clothes around. "I need to get dressed."

"Sure," she said in a little too shaky voice, understanding him perfectly and after another meaningful glance, he sighed again, then almost imperceptibly shook his head and disappeared.

"So we're back to this now?" It was Cisco who asked that question and Caitlin forced herself to tear her eyes away from the spot she'd last seen the man she loved as he disappeared down the corridor of the Labs and shift it to her friend.

"What do you mean?" she asked, still feeling so surreal that she had the urge to just pinch herself to make sure she wasn't dreaming. But no, this was real. Harry was really back and he was back to stay. Suddenly, such sense of happiness hit her that she felt dizzy, nearly drunk on it, for the first time since she could remember able to dream of the future. And she could see it clearly. Her and Harry, together, working in the Labs with the people they loved, that became their family, spending all the nights and their free time together, loving, being, thriving, creating, saving the city. It was all that she could ever want and she didn't even know it until it'd happened to her. Yes, life had sometimes a way of surprising you and pushing you in a direction you'd never see yourself going, but it didn't mean it was the wrong one. Sometimes when you were patient enough you got exactly what you needed, exactly what could make you truly happy as though some higher power knew it better than you. And it probably did.

Caitlin couldn't help it. A huge smile finally formed on her face and the previous tremors that shook her body disappeared, leaving nothing but peace and blissfulness in their wake. Ronnie was gone and he couldn't hurt them anymore. They were safe – at least for now – she reminded herself when thinking of all the threats that might still be out there. Yet, despite them all, she had faith that they would overcome them all if only they worked together as they'd just done. Nothing could strike them hard then.

"What are you smiling about?" Cisco asked, gesticulating to her and then to the exit. "I mean you and Harry! It's like you guys are back to what you used to do before you got together!"

Caitlin frowned. "He really did just feel uncomfortable standing in front of you, guys, only in a blanket. And you did see… I mean…"

"I have seen nothing, man!" Cisco immediately denied, waving his hands in front of his face, his voice a little shrilly. "Can we maybe... order some food so we could all sit around and talk a little? Or maybe you'd rather take your beau home already?"

"I'll go bring some food!" Iris exclaimed in excitement. "Don't go anywhere. We really just want to be here for you two, Cait and celebrate with you that we got dr. Wells back."

"Thank you, Iris," Caitlin smiled at the woman broadly and then she made her way towards Barry and put her arms around him, hugging him tightly. "Thank you, Barry," she told him as well. "Without you, without this lucky break we got with your powers… we might never get him back and…"

"Hey, hey, don't mention it. I was only happy to help," Barry assured her, stroking her back before pulling away to look at her. "I'm sure that we would've found a way. We would _never_ give up."

This time tears shone in Caitlin's eyes.

"What? Don't I deserve a hug, too? I did help!"Cisco chose that moment to remind them about his presence and Caitlin smiled again through her tears of joy before rushing to him. Before she knew it, Barry put his arms around the both of them and they just stood there, embraced.

"I can't believe you, guys. I come back from the speedforce where I was trapped for I don't even know how long and you don't wait for me with the hug?!" they suddenly heard Harry's voice coming from the door and they all laughed when he came straight at them, dressed in the Labs sweatpants and shirt and embraced them all as well.

Caitlin somehow managed to find herself with her face pressed into his neck and she never wanted to let go of this man, just breathing him in, even enjoying the fresh stubble as he clearly didn't want to waste more time with shaving on top of showering and they just stood there like that for a very long time.

"Ok, this is getting awkward," Cisco finally complained and they all laughed.

"You're right, Ramon," Harry agreed, patting the man's back before following with, "Don't get used to this. I'm not much of a hugger."

"I hope that's not true when it comes to me," Cait teased him when immediately plastering herself to his side. His raised his arm and pulled her closer before capturing her lips in a small kiss. They so wanted more than that, but the time for it would come later. Now they both really wanted to do some celebrating with their friends.

Iris came back shortly after that and they just grabbed some chairs and sat down together, eating Big Belly Burger and drinking coffee picked from the Jitters.

"So, how did you, guys, pull it off?" Harry finally asked, nearly licking his fingers after he devoured his first burger. "God, I forgot how good it was! I'm starving!"

"Do you…?" Caitlin started with her own question before answering his, suddenly worried. "Do you remember anything from what happened in the speedforce?" she finally dared ask.

He stilled before looking her straight in the eye, noticing the concern showed there.

"It wasn't hell for me, Snow, not in the way you may think," he then slowly answered, bringing his other hand to her face and putting a strand of her hair behind her ear, anything to just be able to touch her again. And God, he could look at her forever and never get tired of the sight. "It was… it was strange. Like I was suspended, sleeping at first or unconscious for a very long time. There was no here or there, there was just this whirlwind of speedforce around me…" He thought for a moment, a complete silence surrounding him as every pair of eyes was set on him now, curious to what he was going to say next. "I guess I eventually managed to realize where I was and that I wasn't dreaming. I wanted to get out of there so desperately, but there was no way out." On hearing that, Caitlin actually shivered and he immediately took her hand, lacing his fingers through hers, giving her the much needed support and comfort. "It's ok, Snow. At first it was a struggle, but then I somehow talked to it. It assured me that it wasn't the plan to trap me there, that eventually I would be free. It just wouldn't be my doing…" He hesitated for a moment, deducing whether he should tell them about what he saw in there, but in the end he decided against it. He would probably eventually tell Caitlin, but it felt wrong to divulge all of that information to the whole team. "Which brings us here. How did you get me out? How did you get Raymond there?"

"Because of his," Barry spoke then and he reached out his hand, first making sure he wasn't touching Iris – the way those two were with each other reminded Wells of himself and Snow and he immediately knew they were a couple, yet he didn't feel the need to comment on it – and he used his powers, an electric current running over his hand.

Harry's eyes opened widely on seeing that.

"That's… that's remarkable. Did you conduct all the tests? What else can you do and how this correlates to…"

"I was able to power the device that opened the speedforce," Barry slowly explained. "It took some practice to be able to use them the right way, but I think I can manage now."

"Remarkable. And how did you find out about them?"

There was sudden silence when everyone was thinking how to gently relay the news of what had happened to Harrison. There was truly no easy way and they knew he was bound to feel guilty about having to leave.

"You _died?!"_ He raised his voice as soon as he found out, his eyes immediately focusing on Caitlin. "What? I… _Snow_ …"

"Hey, I'm ok. Barry brought me back just like he did with you. Thanks to that he discovered his powers and we could get you back, so it's a win-win," she quickly assured Harrison, but it was all for nothing. She saw the terror and guilt reflected in his eyes clearly. "Harry…"

"No." He shook his head, taking his hand away from her and running it over his mouth. "No. I should've… I should've been faster, damn it!" He raised to his feet and started pacing around the cortex. "I should've…"

"Harry, we don't hold anything against you," Caitlin immediately followed, getting to him and placing her hands on his shoulders from behind as his back was currently turned to her. "None of us is blaming you for what happened. It was painful, yes. Did we wish we'd gotten Ronnie then? Also yes. But we couldn't. What happened, happened. We can only move on."

"What if you never figured out a way to get me out? Would you just never give up till… what? Where would that end, Snow? Where it would all end for you?" He turned to look at her briefly before glancing at the team. "I never wanted that for you. I never wanted for you to have to pay for _my_ mistakes."

"Stop that, ok?" Cisco also stood up. "I think we're all past the point in which we blamed you, Harry. I mean… Ronnie confessed to what he himself did! It's not on you! We might've thought that at first, but not anymore. Even Iris and Barry don't hold anything against you now, so we all should just let it go and move on. It's all behind us now. Ronnie is gone."

Harrison just stood there, his hands on his hips, his lips pressed tightly, a slightly guilty expression still on his face, though Caitlin could see that all of their words were slowly getting through to him. He knew they were right and he didn't like that they were because he always liked to know it all. So typical of him, she almost laughed, remembering how stubborn this man could be, how infuriating! And she just had to fall for him!

In the end, she didn't dare laugh. After all, she did want to get some that night and God, she still couldn't believe that after all those lonely nights during which she felt so terribly cold and cried into her pillow more than once – not that she would admit that to anyone, even her friends since they'd had it hard enough already – she finally got to go home and smile for a change. She could finally feel warm and loved and… _happy_. She wouldn't let anyone take that from her ever again, she made a silent vow and truth be told, she was quite sure Harry already did that, too.

"Maybe we should head home," she eventually suggested, gently placing her hand on his arm and to her relief, he just nodded, still a little embarrassed, but eventually he looked at his friends.

"You're right," he said in a very low and quiet voice, but they all heard him anyway and they all smiled to him. "Well… I should just say thank you, then. I hope…" he cleared his throat. "I hope you all know how much this means to me… what you all did… Especially, you, miss West," he then looked at Iris. "You don't really know me well and you had no reason to even…"

"Oh, stop it, dr. Wells." She just waved her hand as she stood up and surprised him completely when making her way to him and hugging him. "I did it for the both of you," she then said when letting him go. The man was clearly embarrassed, not used to being hugged by strangers that West still felt like. "I couldn't just let myself be happy with Barry when I knew there was someone special who helped me a lot," she glanced at Caitlin, "and was suffering. I needed to help bring her man home."

"Well, um… thank you, miss West and I think you can just call me Harry."

"Then I'm no longer miss West to you."

"I'll… do my best to keep that in mind," he assured her and finally, after saying his goodbye to both Barry and Cisco, he took Snow's hand and they moved towards the corridor and then the exit.

* * *

Oddly enough, they didn't talk all the way to Harrison's house, just enjoying each other's company and the companionable silence. Nothing else was left to be said as Snow drove them home, choosing his place since she knew he would like to get into his own clothes or… preferably, there didn't have to be any clothes involved, she thought then when licking her lips.

She didn't have to wait long and quite frankly, she was sick of not being able to kiss him the way she wanted to, so as soon as the front door closed behind them, she did. They collided naturally, just turning to each other, taking holds of one another's faces and their lips crashed together. Harrison pushed her gently against the wall, her back colliding with it, needing purchase as they kissed, taking and giving everything they got. They had no audience this time and they were so desperate to just be together, to feel one another in ways that made them both feel the most alive. She needed proof that he was really there with her and that he wouldn't disappear the next day when she woke up and he wanted nothing more than to find his home within her body and soul after all the lonely time he'd spent in the speedforce, not able to even talk to another human being. That was truly unbearable, especially with the time perception that seemed to be a little different there.

They didn't even know how it happened that they got rid of their clothes, Harrison's sweatshirt somehow ending up on the floor along with her blouse, her bra out of the way and his hands eager to touch her and explore her body, never able to get enough of her. Before she knew it, he was trailing kisses down her neck, his stubble a little scratchy, but it felt so, so good that she couldn't care less for her skin at the moment; his hands already cupping and massaging her breasts when her hand undid the string on his sweatpants and grasped him firmly, earning a heavy and full of desire groan.

Yes, they were most definitely not going to make it to the bedroom, just having sex in the hall. Not that they minded, though it did feel a little like a déjà bu.

"Harry… Harry… I…" she could only repeat his name over and over again, never having enough of the way it sounded, never having enough of him and his hot presence right next to her, of his body moving against her own, his hands just now ridding of the skirt she was wearing until he was ready to sink into her.

And he did.

"I know," he groaned, pushing inside of her again and again, not able to slow down. He just wasn't able to. He wanted her too much and it'd been way too long and even when they'd started dating before he sacrificed himself, there had always been this looming shadow of Ronnie hanging over them. And all of that was over now, them being completely free for the moment and for the first time they could actually see their happy ending. Or maybe happy beginning, because nothing was going to end anytime soon.

Well, maybe the act of sex itself, because they couldn't possibly hold on any longer, Snow's fingernails digging into his arms as the pleasure was nearly too much to take and then, finally, she felt herself tumbling over the edge and letting go as she climaxed over him, reaching the top of her happiness and feeling so elated that everything that had happened just flew away from her head, leaving only her and Harry and nothing else. He followed soon after with a heavy and delicious to her ears groan and then they just stayed like that, embraced, breathing heavily into each other's necks.

Next, Harrison surprised her completely when whispering in a strained voice, "Snow, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"What are you apologizing for again?" she asked softly when pulling away ever so slightly just so she could cup his face and look into those amazingly blue eyes of his.

"I'm sorry I wasn't fast enough. That I… that I hurt you _again_. I never wanted to hurt you. It just… it just happened."

Caitlin sighed when closing her eyes briefly. Then she finally spoke, "Harrison, I know what I was getting myself into when entering a relationship with you and I never regretted it and I never will. There might be hundreds of other bad guys out there to stop, but no matter what happens, I will _never_ regret anything because I love you and I can't live without you." She stroked those scruffy cheeks of his, not able to refrain herself from touching him at all times.

"Still, I need you to know…"

"I know," she assured him, kissing his lips briefly.

"I would never…"

"I know," she repeated, now showering his face with small kisses.

"You probably deserve better."

"Nonsense." She found his lips again and her arms went around his neck as she pressed herself close to him yet once again. "Oh…" She gasped in surprise when she actually felt him harder again, still inside of her

"You like that?" he asked, his voice heavy.

"You know I do."

They were once again powerless to fight this. What they had was too strong and despite Harrison sometimes thinking she might be better off with someone else, someone who would take a better care of her and would never hurt her, he couldn't let her go. He was unable to. That was _it_ for him. Once she'd given herself over to him there was no coming back and they both knew it. Besides, if the person you loved didn't have the power to hurt you, then maybe it wasn't love anymore?

He used his speed and Snow squealed, a delightful sound for his ears. He immediately had her pinned under him on his bed, still being inside of her, so he just started making love to her right away, this time slow, enjoying her, savoring that he was back in her arms. He reached his hand to her own and laced his fingers through her over her head, keeping steady pace and always, _always_ kissing those lips. And he also made a vow. He knew he couldn't change the past and fix his own mistakes, keeping her away from himself for so long being one of them, but what he could do now was to make sure she would always know how much he loved her, he could put her first from now on and no matter what.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, _brokenbookaddict_ , the stubble is for you! LOL But seriously, au! It's scratchy when you have sensitive skin, girl!
> 
> Also, I do know what’s next, I have it all figured out, but I don’t know if and when I’m gonna have enough of inspiration and energy to follow up with that, so yeah, for now you can treat it as end of part one or something. Though the ideas are coming, so maybe… /grin/


End file.
